
Originally Posted by
Buster Highmen
Going out of Glendive MT, a rusted Detroit boat veered over to the shoulder, a gargantuan behemoth of a station wagon. It sat low on it's springs and blew blue. Jon and I jogged up and looked in. In the passenger seat sat a grizzled lank guy about 45 or fifty. At the helm sat an old hooker with spackled kohl and maplike eyepaint.
"We're going to Williston, then North she said. Jon and I ran back, grabbed
the stash cans, duffles and skis and loaded in andcarved off into the early night.
Ka-keeeek/chunk...ka-kreeeeeek/kachunk closed the doors. Metallic stale
cigarette smoke, faint waft of pot and piles of beer cans. Lucky lager.
Ripped vinyl seats, foam stuffing flecks, candy wrappers old newspapers.
The tank crawled back onto the freeway, wheezing and rattlings in vague
threats of failure. Masses of rusted plates clanked and the paintchips
strained at holding the car together.
Jon sat behind the driver and I sat behind the passenger.
"Thanks for the ride" said Jon in an uncharacteristically loquacious
mien. "Yeah, thanks" I echoed.
All that day, the drivers who had picked us up had mentioned how dangerous
hitchhiking had become, a few seasoning us with tales of murders, rape
and robbery. While we knew that these things were a remote possibility,
I always dismissed them to the back of my mind. Denial is such a powerful
coping mechanism.
The woman asked us where we were going. Again Jon spoke up.
"Madison" he said and then offered the driver and passenger some of our
crummy weed. I thought this was really weird for Jon, but I suspected that
he was a little uneasy, as was I. The guy in the passenger slumped and
mumbled and appreciative response, so Jon twisted up a quick reefer.
We passed the joint around, our benefactors greedily sucking on the joint.
Then for some reason, Jon again began to thank them for the ride.
"Yeah" he continues, "we got a lot of flack about how dangerous this is
and stuff...so thanks for picking us up. We're not any trouble..."
At those words, the passenger whipped around and pointed a .45 handgun
about and inch from my face.
"Trouble?" he uttered, "we're ready for trouble..."
Never in my entire life had my cerebellum and my cerebrum been at such odds. The smooth muscles of my sphincter and the gorge of my
throat clenched in a frenzied effort to expel all matter from their respective caches.
Meanwhile, what little shred of presence of my mind remained desperately
clung to the old fashioned notion that soiling the car with shit and vomit
would not be well received.
Then the guy gave me a toothy smile and put the gun down chuckling.
I looked at Jon who now had a goggle eyed look of abject terror. I mouthed
"Shut the fuck up" at him. Of course, I was at a complete loss for what to do.
The old guy handed me the joint. I told him my name. He told me his name was Mike. Then he offered us beers.
My hands were shaking uncontrollably. I still thought I was going to puke.
I took the beer as calmly as I could fake, ripped it open and chugged down
as much as I could. I have never been a beer drinker, but I thought if I
could make my throat consume something, it would lose the notion of purging.
And so began a long sling into the night. I figured honesty was the best
policy, so I told the old whore and Mike that we were headed to Madison to
try to score some good hash.
In reciprocity, Mike told us that he had killed a guy in Michigan and had
been hiding out in Wyoming for a couple of years and was nearly arrested,
but shot the officer trying to cuff him. They were now on the run to North
Dakota where they could hide out for a while.
My attempt at honesty made me feel a little better for a while. I couldn't
figure out if they were just pulling my leg or if they were really telling
the truth.
In any case, for hours in that backseat I would be randomly seized with an
overwhelming panic that at any moment, we were going down some side road and someone would find our bleached bones years from this night of stupidity.
Fatigue and fear kept me awake as the four of us shared pot, beer and
cigarettes into the American night.
It was a long ride that night, both literally and
figuratively. Looking down the wrong end of a large
handgun has had a lasting effect. Since that night,
playing honestly, looking directly into the moment
became a maxim and a goal.
Mike and the old hooker, who never did tell us her
name, dropped us off in Williston and motored off. I
can't say if I'd ever been more relieved.
Sticking to I-94 was part of the strategy, but figured
we could find a place to crash somewhere at the UND
Williston campus since we did get a decent ride.
Little did we realize how different a world this was.
We dragged our duffles and the skis a couple of miles
over to the campus. To our surprise, the place was
locked up tight. Every student we saw, when
approached, ran off and hid, pulling curtains and
closing doors in their wake.
Exhausted isn't a sufficient word for the way I felt:
hung with weight, depressed, confused and leaden.
Exasperated, Jon and I wandered into a field near the
dorms and collapsed. We each pulled out the blankets
Doc had given to us and rolled up in it
out in the field. I passed out.
Then something woke me up. I didn't really understand
it at the time and I was so dog tired, I just wanted
to sleep some more, but something wasn't right. I
listened. Nothing. I couldn't see anything unusual and
my mind bounced back and forth between
going back to sleep and trying to figure out what the
matter was. I thought that maybe I had to piss or
something, so I sat up.
Then I fell over.
I sat up again and again toppled over, scraping my
face on the brush and rocks. I began to realize what
was going on. My arms were useless, limp and numb. My
legs were numb.
At that moment, I knew that I had to get up or I was
going to freeze to death. I felt warm and tired and
just ached to lay back down and forget about it. But I
knew if I did, I'd die.
So I began to flop. I thrashed. I raked my face
several times across the scrub and stones in the
field. I flapped my arms for aeons and finally they
came back with that wretched electric tingling. Then I
could at least sit up
and use my arms to steady myself while I kicked the
blood back into my legs. That also took an eternity,
but finally I was able to stand up and stagger over to
where Jon lay.
I toed Jon several times, eliciting a stream of dopey
verbal abuse. "Get up" I said "get up, Jon, we're
freezing to death".
Jon sat up about to give me the what for and promptly
fell over. The next time I saw his face, I could see
the terror on it. I watched him thrash and buck the
blood back into his system until he could get up.
We didn't talk much, but with the temperatures in the
teens, we knew we had to get inside. So dragging our
stuff, we sluffed into the town looking for a place to
get warm.
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