Older parents-WWYD?

[Harry]

Very sad to read this liv2ski. Best wishes for your family.


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[PNWbrit]

Thanks all. She went peacefully in about 20 minutes after drinking that potion. I hope per her beliefs, that she is in a much better place now with her mom and my sister.
So happy to be home with my wife, 2 doggies and 3 kitties.

That we might all go so peacefully when we decide.

[liv2ski]

Nope, the bullshit she had to go through to get there was untenable. I am buying a 9mm next week to end it. No fuckin way will I deal with what she had to.

[SumJongGuy]

Vibes. I had mixed thoughts during and after going through similar with my mom 2 years ago. Guilty feelings for being glad it was finally over for her.... and me.. latter part was where the guilt was coming from. Then I realized she was likely also glad it was over for everyone.. with my dad, rest of her family, pets that crossed the rainbow bridge over the years.. etc.. Be glad for the good life she had before it got shitty. +1 to the exit strategy for an uncurable and debilitating condition.. I do NOT want to be a burden on others..

[KQ]

6 Uncomfortable But Necessary Questions To Ask Your Older Parents

[up an down]

Good luck to all with the end of life journeys of your parents!!!.. I had one parent who was lucky to die at home at 97....another was less fortunate and died in a nursing home after a stay of a few years.....I am lucky enough that my parents, my 3 siblings and I, agreed on how to deal with the issues.

[house]

I think a couple tanks of helium and some exit bags are a good option for anyone nearing death.

A 9mm is certainly easy to obtain but I think adds to the burden on those you leave behind.

My 80 y/o dad has maybe one or two friends left. The last friend of his who died used a handgun shortly after a cancer diagnosis, not wanting to be “sick” after a lifetime of excellent health. I get it, but I think knowing how he went out makes it sting more for my dad.


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[gravitylover]

My dad has chosen to just let himself fade away. He decided that he's sick of spending 2 weeks at a time laying around hospital ERs dealing with UTIs. He gets one a few times a year and he's so antibiotic resistant that they have to give him some crazy super juices intravenously, it takes 10 days to get the culture back then at least a few days for them to confirm it's working before they'll release him so it 14-16 days at a time in the hospital. Where he lives the places are so busy he doesn't even get a room just a bed in a hallway or recess along with dozens of other seniors and he's sick of it. Tired of docs that suck, tired of always being sick and weak, tired of not being able to leave medical caregivers for more than a few hours... He's giving up. He signed up with hospice and stopped taking his meds other than insulin and painkillers, he got a wheelchair so he doesn't even have to get up other than to get on and off the fukn toilet. It's just a matter of time now

[Meadow Skipper]

A 9mm is certainly easy to obtain but I think adds to the burden on those you leave behind.

Yeah, I want narcotics, lots of narcotics and float out on a cloud.

[KQ]

My dad has chosen to just let himself fade away. He decided that he's sick of spending 2 weeks at a time laying around hospital ERs dealing with UTIs. He gets one a few times a year and he's so antibiotic resistant that they have to give him some crazy super juices intravenously, it takes 10 days to get the culture back then at least a few days for them to confirm it's working before they'll release him so it 14-16 days at a time in the hospital. Where he lives the places are so busy he doesn't even get a room just a bed in a hallway or recess along with dozens of other seniors and he's sick of it. Tired of docs that suck, tired of always being sick and weak, tired of not being able to leave medical caregivers for more than a few hours... He's giving up. He signed up with hospice and stopped taking his meds other than insulin and painkillers, he got a wheelchair so he doesn't even have to get up other than to get on and off the fukn toilet. It's just a matter of time now

I'm so sorry for both of you.

There is a hospice nurse who does tictoks (I see them on FB reels) I'll see if I can find her link. She is wonderful and so uplifting. I find it reassuring and helpful, maybe you all will also.

Found her - here is one of her reels:

https://www.facebook.com/reel/2118233058521667

[JohnF]

Very sorry.

I went through this and my Mother finally passed earlier this year.

It's been hard to grieve the loss with all of the "have to do 's" regarding the estate afterwards.

[mcski]

Yeah, I want narcotics, lots of narcotics and float out on a cloud.

Too much insulin ain’t a bad way to go out either if you happen to be diabetic

My dad lived to 89 and had significant medical issues the last 10 years or so and was a frequent flyer at the hospital, but he said the worst thing was outliving all his friends

[KQ]

Very sorry.

I went through this and my Mother finally passed earlier this year.

It's been hard to grieve the loss with all of the "have to do 's" regarding the estate afterwards.

Yeah the after stuff is almost worse. My mother is still alive but in rehab. When she gets out she will go to assisted living. I'm supposed to be cleaning out her apartment but it's hard. What to keep, what to throw out.....decisions I don't want to make.

Too much insulin ain’t a bad way to go out either if you happen to be diabetic

My dad lived to 89 and had significant medical issues the last 10 years or so and was a frequent flyer at the hospital, but he said the worst thing was outliving all his friends

My grandmother lived to be 102 and said the same thing.

[old goat]

Too much insulin ain’t a bad way to go out either if you happen to be diabetic

My dad lived to 89 and had significant medical issues the last 10 years or so and was a frequent flyer at the hospital, but he said the worst thing was outliving all his friends

The insulin might kill you or it might just wreck the brain.

[gravitylover]

Thanks. I'm gonna go see him tomorrow and work through some stuff before he really starts to fade. I know he's been upping the painkillers and yesterday he sounded thoroughly exhausted so, how much longer.

Damnit

[Cono Este]

Vibes liv2ski.

My mother bounces back from the dead every yr. Her aorta blew out about 5 yrs ago. This yr I thought it was good for,p good, but she made it again. She’s got a bag in-place of a stomach now. I’m keeping my life simple, because it won’t be long now.

[byates1]

Yeah, I want narcotics, lots of narcotics and float out on a cloud.

This. Fentanyl is available very cheap. Nap time ..

[TBS]

Yeah, I want narcotics, lots of narcotics and float out on a cloud.

This - kind of like when we put down our furkids.

Deep condolences liv2ski. Despite the bullshit you/she had to deal with, at least she had that choice.

My mom died of terminal cancer in 1994, three years before OR passed its Death with Dignity Act. It was a fuckin rough two years on everyone, esp my dad.

Happy for you that you got to spend those last days with her, and see her off.

[liv2ski]

Thanks again guys and sorry to hear about your mom's situation TBS. That is tough.

[Buster Highmen]

Condolences liv2ski. Lotsa good on you for seeing her through all that.

My mom slowly wasted away in a hospital bed 3200 miles away a few years ago. It sucked.

[XXX-er]

The insulin might kill you or it might just wreck the brain.

I realize that whole do no wong mantra is firmwired into your psyche

but at this stage in life what does it matter ?

[Meadow Skipper]

This. Fentanyl is available very cheap. ..

Think Medicare will cover it?

[Cisco Kid]

Think Medicare will cover it?

Wouldn't be surprised. I'd feel more comfortable in my suffering just knowing I had control about ending it. I've heard that where it is legal, about 1/2 of the people who are cleared for the dose never take it.

[riser4]

It's nice to have options.

[TBS]

Think Medicare will cover it?

Prolly not, unless that clocker on the corner is on Medicare’s Rx providers list