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Thread: The Backcountry Just Got Weird

  1. #1
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    The Backcountry Just Got Weird

    You ever see things that defy explanation in the bc?

    This last Sunday I was spending the beautiful sunny afternoon lapping some terrain on our main local hill.

    I was chilling at the top enjoying the sun and a beer, waiting for a specific aspect to corn up, when a figure comes skinning up out of one of the bowels.

    As the individual came nearer I thought:
    "Hey it's a girl, Sweetness!"
    -her profile was showing some beautiful mountain mammeries

    As this skinning vixen came closer, I began to get a better look, ...and things started to get weird.
    "Ehh Wha...? wadeaminidhere whazi-whoozie?"

    The person was no juggy bc tele girl, but a Cross Dressing Tranny Backcountry Skier!

    The "ski outfit" (sorry no pics, I was caught a bit unawares)
    -spandex short shorts, showing off the cleanly shaven legs, (I averted my eyes from the package region)
    -a day-glo yellow brassiere (no top over it), with what appeared to be newspaper stuffed double D's
    -full make-up, including; lip stick, blush, and eye liner, applied heavy-handedly
    -teleskiing on this years BD Justice

    As Terry/Kris/Pat? approached I wasn't sure how to react and simply asked how the snow was in that particular bowl, it was close to ready, so I said thanks, stifled my incredulity, gathered up my gear and let it loose down Waterfall.
    -having one of the better runs of the season as my mind was so occupied with the last few minutes that I just felt detached and let the muscle memory take over

    The backcountry just got weird.


    TIL: Trannies are pretty good tele skiers.


    You folks had any strange encounters out there?

  2. #2
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    So, you had to rub one before you could drop in?

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeathVan View Post
    . . . a figure comes skinning up out of one of the bowels.
    PM Rontele - he can tell you all about trannys in the bowels.

  4. #4
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    there's an annual mother's day jaunt in drag up mt st helens
    someone must be practicing...

  5. #5
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    Theory: It never happened, i.e., merely DV's gender-confused dream

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by flatlander#2 View Post
    So, you had to rub one before you could drop in?
    Doesn't everyone?


    Quote Originally Posted by Big Steve View Post
    Theory: It never happened, i.e., merely DV's gender-confused dream
    Definitely DID happen.

    He's the local tranny commercial fisherman.

    Every fishing town's got one...

  7. #7
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    Okay. Weirder shit has happened on Kodiak

  8. #8
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    Huh. Skiing in drag is definitely weird. Never seen anything like that out there.

    Next thing you'll be saying he was black, too.
    ...Some will fall in love with life and drink it from a fountain that is pouring like an avalanche coming down the mountain...

    "I enjoy skinny skiing, bullfights on acid..." - Lacy Underalls

    The problems we face will not be solved by the minds that created them.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Big Steve View Post
    Okay. Weirder shit has happened on Kodiak
    Beat me to it.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeathVan View Post
    Definitely DID happen.

    He's the local tranny commercial fisherman.

    Every fishing town's got one...
    So, you knew this person already? There's a Monty Python skit in here...

    [Scene: mountain top on Kodiak island. DeathVan is sitting on a rock sunning himself, when another skier crests and skins over]
    Tranny: Hey DeathVan, wassup?
    DV: not much Burt. Gorgeous day. How's the snow in the bowl?
    Tranny: hey it's getting good.
    DV: Cool. been waiting for over an hour to soften a little. Time to ride
    Tranny: I gotta take a breather and redo my makeup. When you headed out to sea again?
    DV: Friday. You?
    T: Monday. Stop by the boat on your way out.
    DV: will do. Be safe. That's a lovely ensemble btw.
    T: why thank you sweety.

  11. #11
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    Your first clue that something was weird was when this individual came:
    Quote Originally Posted by DeathVan View Post
    skinning up out of one of the bowels.

  12. #12
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    nothing wrong with it.
    b
    .

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeathVan View Post
    ... a figure comes skinning up out of one of the bowels.

    ...
    Sounds like a shitty place to ski.
    ...Some will fall in love with life and drink it from a fountain that is pouring like an avalanche coming down the mountain...

    "I enjoy skinny skiing, bullfights on acid..." - Lacy Underalls

    The problems we face will not be solved by the minds that created them.

  14. #14
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    You should have challenged her/him to a ...



    ... Drag race.


  15. #15
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    What this thread does not mention is, this was Death Van's wet dream. He now knows what he likes to see in a "woman", from deep inside his psych.

    You go get 'em sweetie~!!
    Terje was right.

    "We're all kooks to somebody else." -Shelby Menzel

  16. #16
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    akpm on spring break on Kodiak?
    I didn't believe in reincarnation when I was your age either.

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by telebobski View Post
    So, you knew this person already? There's a Monty Python skit in here...

    [Scene: mountain top on Kodiak island. DeathVan is sitting on a rock sunning himself, when another skier crests and skins over]
    Tranny: Hey DeathVan, wassup?
    DV: not much Burt. Gorgeous day. How's the snow in the bowl?
    Tranny: hey it's getting good.
    DV: Cool. been waiting for over an hour to soften a little. Time to ride
    Tranny: I gotta take a breather and redo my makeup. When you headed out to sea again?
    DV: Friday. You?
    T: Monday. Stop by the boat on your way out.
    DV: will do. Be safe. That's a lovely ensemble btw.
    T: why thank you sweety.
    Never happen. Kodiak fishermen have a phobia about leaving port on a Friday.
    Living vicariously through myself.

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeathVan View Post
    ...I averted my eyes from the package region...
    Doubtful
    Quando paramucho mi amore de felice carathon.
    Mundo paparazzi mi amore cicce verdi parasol.
    Questo abrigado tantamucho que canite carousel.


  19. #19
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    I was out mountain biking in a state park by my house on some pretty well used trails and topped a hill to see someone running in front of me. He was probably a couple blocks ahead of me. As I got closer, I could see he was running without a shirt and, even closer, could see he was carrying his running shorts in his hand, wearing only his shoes. I made some kind of noise and he ducked into the bushes. All I could do was laugh my ass off when I went by and hit the gas to get out of there. So, weirdness isn't confined to b/c.

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by GoldMember View Post
    I was out mountain biking in a state park by my house on some pretty well used trails and topped a hill to see someone running in front of me. He was probably a couple blocks ahead of me. As I got closer, I could see he was running without a shirt and, even closer, could see he was carrying his running shorts in his hand, wearing only his shoes. I made some kind of noise and he ducked into the bushes. All I could do was laugh my ass off when I went by and hit the gas to get out of there. So, weirdness isn't confined to b/c.
    i was walking my cat when a huge midget flashed me. i farted and she showed even more bush, well i tugged on my dog to get out of there. So, weirdness isn't confined to b/c, you are correct.
    b
    .

  21. #21
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    That does actually sound like a Monty Python skit, but hey, it's cool when you can combine 2 passions.
    No longer stuck.

    Quote Originally Posted by stuckathuntermtn View Post
    Just an uneducated guess.

  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by grrrr View Post
    Never happen. Kodiak fishermen have a phobia about leaving port on a Friday.
    Not just Kodiak. Most comm fishermen have that hang-up. When I was doing species trawl surveys with the ADFG (AK Department of Fish and Game), we'd contract various small trawlers to do the survey..often with Norwegian skippers/mates. The one time one of our Norwegian-captained boats DID leave on a Friday (as ordered by the regional head biologist), we left Akutan Island and lost all power on the main control panel...which shut down the whole boat, the mains and even the gennies. We were in the dark for 12 hours , bobbing around in the trough.

    The ultra-supertitious captain was at a loss, though...as he didn't know whether to blame it on leaving on Friday, the new FEMALE Chief Engineer he had just hired on, or on the furry stuffed animal she had brought aboard to her stateroom. All three are a BIG no no to a fisherman of Norwegoan ancestry!!!
    "The reason death sticks so closely to life isn't biological necessity - it's envy. Life is so beautiful that death has fallen in love with it; a jealous, possesive love that grabs at what it can." by Yann Martel from Life of Pi



    Posted by DJSapp:
    "Squirrels are rats with good PR."

  23. #23
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    not just Norwegian fisherman. Friend of mine fished all over Aust, NZ, Europe. In addition to what you mentioned, whistling was the biggest no-no (you'll whistle up the wind), also no bananas. There were probably a few more also.

  24. #24
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    to much time on the rock.... Hows the snow holding up down there?
    Its not that I suck at spelling, its that I just don't care

  25. #25
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    I was high on mushrooms once while walking a hiking trail near town (bozeman) with some friends. I stayed behind to take a piss, kinda just ended up tripping out and staring off into space with my dick in my hand for a while, till I hear a noise and look up, woman walking her dog with a look of horror on her face looking at me. Ahh, shit, took me a few seconds to realize my cock was still in my hand. I think she thought I was rubbing one out.

    Also, after climbing and skiing conundrum and castle peaks in co with addimen and doumal from here, when we finished skiing and were switching back to hiking boots, putting the skis on the pack for the walk out, I took off my ski pants. Of course, I had board shorts on underneath, so I wasn't naked. Feeling the wind on my sweaty legs, newly free of their gore tex prison, I loudly proclaimed, damn, that feels great. Doumal promptly excused himself and started heading down the trail. I looked down and realized that the last time I had taken a piss, while I remembered to zip up the fly of my ski pants (which were now off) I must of forgotten to zip up the fly of the board shorts as well, so upon taking off my ski pants, my junk was now sorta half hanging out. I had also loudly proclaimed how good it felt. Doumal ran off but me and andy laughed about it once i got my shit properly stowed.

    I guess I'm the BC wierdo.
    __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ ________________
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