Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

**DropCliffsNotBombs** · 02-01-2009, 11:00 AM

Gapers are interestingly attracted to "jumps" with crappy, bombed-out, flat landings... like moths to a porch light.

Oh yeah, they must also be within view of a chairlift or lodge, you know, for braggin' rights!

**Cyber Cop** · 02-01-2009, 05:07 PM

"Is the water safe to drink?" - Turon from NYC checking into hotel.

**paulster2626** · 02-01-2009, 05:49 PM

Just remembered this one - I was about 10 years old, skiing in NH with my parents and their friends. My dad and I were on a lift at Cannon Mtn. (I think), and my parent's friend commented on how large the moguls were that the snow-cats had made overnight. My dad called him out immediately - it was solid. We still joke about that one when we ski together.

knarshedmotatoes · 02-01-2009, 05:56 PM

today in the park, pulled a 360

"woah he did a whirlybird!"

**puhisurfer** · 02-01-2009, 07:42 PM

I have a new favorite. Not exactly overhead-gaper, but I took my GF to Maine, yesterday, and it was her 5th day ever on a board:

I'm in line, getting a beer with lunch.

GF: There's no where to sit up here.
Me: Just grab a seat downstairs, I'll be there in a minute.
GF: Where?
Me: Downstairs.
GF: Where?
Me: The seats downstairs.
GF: How do you get there?
Me: You go down the stairs.
Entire bar within earshot starts to laugh. She's walks out.

About 10 mins after lunch she broke her wrist, and not long after that she's the ex-gf. Too bad.

**karpiel** · 02-01-2009, 07:49 PM

Originally Posted by puhisurfer

I have a new favorite. Not exactly overhead-gaper, but I took my GF to Maine, yesterday, and it was her 5th day ever on a board:

I'm in line, getting a beer with lunch.

GF: There's no where to sit up here.
Me: Just grab a seat downstairs, I'll be there in a minute.
GF: Where?
Me: Downstairs.
GF: Where?
Me: The seats downstairs.
GF: How do you get there?
Me: You go down the stairs.
Entire bar within earshot starts to laugh. She's walks out.

About 10 mins after lunch she broke her wrist, and not long after that she's the ex-gf. Too bad.

I would be happy about it now being ex.

**Donkey Punch** · 02-01-2009, 08:18 PM

Originally Posted by puhisurfer

About 10 mins after lunch she broke her wrist, and not long after that she's the ex-gf. Too bad.

You have no reason not to post nekkid pics then.

**farmer** · 02-01-2009, 08:43 PM

on the chair with a couple from fernie. they were talking about back home how they would duck the ropes at night to get to the runs that didn't have lights.....

because the mountain would groom those right away, and they could hit up the fresh groomers.

who the fuck ducks the ropes for groomers?

**gatorboy** · 02-01-2009, 08:51 PM

Her story - my boyfriend acts like an ass, so I faked an injury, broke up with him, and now on my way to let his best friend fuck me....

in der pooperhuisen

**Downbound Train** · 02-01-2009, 09:40 PM

Rental Mental crashes yard sale style right under the lift I'm riding with my 6 year old daughter.

Gaper grabs his nether regions and screams, not in a funny way....AAAhhhhh my DICK. (Not AAAhhhh my balls, but AAAhhhh my Dick. )

6 year old daughter says "Dad, when that happens don't you hurt your Balls?"

**El Chupacabra** · 02-01-2009, 11:15 PM

Originally Posted by puhisurfer

About 10 mins after lunch she broke her wrist, and not long after that she's the ex-gf. Too bad.

No hand jobs = dumped?

**adam** · 02-01-2009, 11:23 PM

Originally Posted by El Chupacabra

No hand jobs = dumped?

good one!

**2nd mate** · 02-02-2009, 05:59 AM

So last night after a marathon of flights back from my honeymoon, i finally make it back to the states. The TSA "Officer" confiscates the tiny ass snow globe from my wife's pack which was meant for my goddaughter. He says, " would you like to at least keep the box?". fucking retard.

**karpiel** · 02-02-2009, 06:47 AM

Yesterday a boarder in front of me in the line waiting for the rope to drop attempts to stomp his board and ends up stomping it on my skis. He mutters something and keeps doing it. Seconds later his shitty headphones break into 3 pieces, I said something along the lines of "karma, bitch" and he takes his board off and walks away.

**harpo** · 02-02-2009, 07:43 PM

"they are a good ski; they just don't match my current desire to have a more twin-tippy touring ski."

referring to his BD megawatts

**mutineer** · 02-02-2009, 08:38 PM

BWAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!

**jwproulx** · 02-03-2009, 01:37 AM

Originally Posted by TeleHoar

Landrover in the snow = FAIL.

Similar experience: One day in May, 2003, I thought I'd go and ski Quandary Peak via the Christo Couloir. The road to the reservoir alternated between bare and snowdrifts, so I had to hike it both ways maybe 2 miles and about 500' elevation one way. The hike was a bit of a drag, but I had a good time.

About half way up, I saw an old beater truck stuck in a snowdrift (see attached photo). It looked like it had been there quite a while. Bummer. That year was really dry until an epic March blizzard, so I figured that the truck might have gotten stuck then.

...

On the hike down I heard an awful racket. After a few minutes of walking, I came around a bend and saw the truck blasting its way up through the snow. That crazy fucker really wanted to get up that road.

I'm still not sure who the gaper in the story is ... but my jaw dropped when he drove by.

**skiATL** · 02-05-2009, 01:10 PM

http://skinc.com/messageboard/showthread.php?t=9230

**schindlerpiste** · 02-05-2009, 01:31 PM

This week, I have a friend out from NY. He's 6'1" 190lbs. I lent him my 195 SuperBROs. After skiing one run (on a groomer), he saidme "Dood, these skis are waay too short and really fat."

**ljm** · 02-05-2009, 01:42 PM

last wk on the chair at Alpine... talking w/ a marginally cute snowboarder.

her: i really like Sugar Bowl on a powder day... they have great crevasses.

edit: page top!!

**buckethead** · 02-09-2009, 02:35 PM

after skiing many laps on red line at magic saturday, from the chair:
"i hope those are your rock skis"

the trail was in great shape - 10 days after the last storm no less - a few rocks here and there, but no serious trouble avoiding 'em at speed if you know how to turn/steer.

if there was a chair over the woods would he say "i hope you have your chainsaw skis?"

as for my bases, one wide and shallow scuff after 10 not-too-cautious laps

**Fat City** · 02-09-2009, 02:59 PM

The munsons riding the chair behind me talking about his new "souped" up car.
Munson #1 to munson#2: "Man you should see how siiiick my car is now. I've got it all pimped out."

Munson#2: "Nice dude, did you soup up the engine too?"

Munson#1 "Fuckin' A man. Last weekend I was doing 130mph in 3rd gear, but I didn't want to go any faster cuz it would mess up my speedometer."

Sweet Jesus. I almost fucking lost it right there. Good thing I was at the top of the lift and got the hell away from them before they could start offering me Keystone Ice.

**counterfeitfake** · 02-09-2009, 03:49 PM

Originally Posted by ljm

last wk on the chair at Alpine... talking w/ a marginally cute snowboarder.

her: i really like Sugar Bowl on a powder day... they have great crevasses.

edit: page top!!

Did she have a great crevass?

**waxman** · 02-09-2009, 05:00 PM

Originally Posted by farmer

on the chair with a couple from fernie. they were talking about back home how they would duck the ropes at night to get to the runs that didn't have lights.....
because the mountain would groom those right away, and they could hit up the fresh groomers.
who the fuck ducks the ropes for groomers?

what lights? there are no lights at fernie...