Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

**KillerMonkey** · 01-28-2009, 06:40 PM

How do you get to Chad's Gap from here? (just guess where)

**9.8m/s^2** · 01-28-2009, 07:46 PM

Heard this in the bar at kirkwood... "

we got stuck between these two rocks and all we could do was slide straight down" (referring to heelside scrapeage).

**Ted Striker** · 01-28-2009, 08:59 PM

I like that username ^^^^

**paulster2626** · 01-28-2009, 10:02 PM

My wife and I live 4km from a 240' bump with a few chairlifts on it. Since I've skied my entire life, and she basically started when we met, she takes a lesson there every Saturday morning. She's pretty good, and shows improvement every year - just needs to get some confidence to go faster and let the skis do the work in the turns, but I digress.

This particular hill is THE place to be to see people who cannot speak a word of English try to ski with their coats open while wearing soaking wet jeans. Here the Skier's Responsibility Code does not apply. At no time do you have the right of anything. I'll probably head out there next week myself, and I'll be sure to take some pics for you guys - some funny stuff to see.
Anyhow, last Saturday she comes home and begins to give me the weekly rundown of what gaper activity she witnessed that morning. As she's talking about the usual liftline-douchery, I notice something isn't right with her equipment. Ahh there it is - she's gone and taken one of her poles, and one of mine, which is a good 4" or so longer. Good thing to do on the first day of lessons to make sure you get in the "special" group.

So who's the gaper now?

**Metatron** · 01-28-2009, 10:17 PM

I don't know how gaperrific this guy was but riding up Dipper today in an epic Southern accent I overheard, "On that last run I was workin' out them re-fried beans from last night... almost shit my pants."

**paulster2626** · 01-28-2009, 10:19 PM

Originally Posted by Metatron

I don't know how gaperrific this guy was but riding up Dipper today in an epic Southern accent I overheard, "On that last run I was workin' out them re-fried beans from last night... almost shit my pants."

Is it even possible for people to shit while moving? I thought that talent was reserved for horses.

**TacocaT** · 01-28-2009, 10:23 PM

**Metatron** · 01-28-2009, 10:26 PM

Oh shit! That's nasty! haha

At least he finished the race... *dry heave*

**paulster2626** · 01-28-2009, 10:28 PM

Hahhaahah hilarious.

I stand corrected.

**mjizz** · 01-29-2009, 12:09 AM

i've never written lol on anything in my life, until i saw the above photo and nearly pissed myself.

**TeleHoar** · 01-29-2009, 11:36 AM

Please don't use the ski trails for your own personal back-road!

Apparently this tricked out dealer landrover from Boulder thought it would be good to turn up this small trail for some pictures. It is NOT a road, it's a summertime hike trail and in-town ski trail coming from Peak 9. It spills out at the Beaver Run.

Their fancy landrover got promptly stuck in the 28" of snow back there. They dug for awhile and then called in a tow truck. They were embarassed and didn't like me taking pictures.

Landrover in the snow = FAIL.

**Concussed** · 01-29-2009, 12:35 PM

Originally Posted by paulster2626

Ahh there it is - she's gone and taken one of her poles, and one of mine, which is a good 4" or so longer. Good thing to do on the first day of lessons to make sure you get in the "special" group.

So who's the gaper now?

That is just awesome.

**khakis** · 01-29-2009, 12:42 PM

Originally Posted by paulster2626

Here the Skier's Responsibility Code does not apply. At no time do you have the right of anything.

These lines just made my day

**macmahoooon** · 01-29-2009, 03:55 PM

Short, hobbit looking guy. "I'm ready for an awesome night, got my snowblades all ready with a fresh coat of candle wax last night. I hope the snow is fast!"

**frito bandito** · 01-31-2009, 09:03 PM

The Gaper next to me on the lift: So, did you buy those skis in Utah?
Me: Uh, no, I got these online.
Gaper: Well did they come out of a rental program then?
Me:Uh....
Gaper's friend: Dude, he probably put that sticker on there himself!
Apparently he thought my Alta sticker meant my skis came from Utah.

Also from today - "There goes the medical crew again" Referring to the patrollers.

**jetski** · 01-31-2009, 09:15 PM

If everyone was as cool as me I wouldn't be nearly as cool...

**MCLC** · 01-31-2009, 09:55 PM

In the lift line today:

Gaper 1. "There's this resort in Utah that's supposed to be the best place anywhere. There's like this much powder (gestures over his head) and they don't allow snowboarders [strange considering that the guy talking is a boarder]. I can't remember what it's called . . . Lake Tahoe? Is that in Utah?"
Gaper 2. "Yeah. It's on the Utah-Cali boarder." - and I think he meant it.

**BushwackerinPA** · 01-31-2009, 10:16 PM

whats the difference between a landrover and a camry driving on a ski trail?

the land rover get stuck further away from the tow truck.

**fish** · 01-31-2009, 10:19 PM

why do stupid people have so much money? i just don't get it

**HingeFootCutFace** · 01-31-2009, 10:29 PM

not a comment, but this happened. A Euro brought in his circa 1970s boots to rent a demo ski today. My bro Steve adjusted the demo binder, and snapped the boot in. Well sort of. The orange boot exploded into thousands of small pieces much the same way a bag of cheetos would if opened to exuberantly. I laughed. The guy was pissed.

**mtsprings** · 01-31-2009, 10:39 PM

Not a gaper on the mountain but,

I am not a whiskey drinker but I had some friends stopping by my house after skiing and I knew that they both liked whiskey and coke.

Montana only allows liquor to be sold in state stores and bars. The stores have bank hours so I stopped by small Montana bar to pick up a bottle on my way home from the mountain.

At this small bar, I had the choice of a bottle of Ten High and a bottle of R&R. I had not bought R&R since college because it was cheap. The Ten High, which I had never really heard of, was even cheaper so I hesitantly chose the R&R.

The long time, loyal, patron of this bar sitting next to me nodded his approval and offered this gem.

“That is what I like, I like mixing R&R with Mt. Dew”

**stuckathuntermtn** · 01-31-2009, 11:00 PM

Originally Posted by fish

why do stupid people have so much money? i just don't get it

well, in this instance, they're dealer plates.

**Nathan Explosion** · 01-31-2009, 11:01 PM

Originally Posted by mtsprings

“That is what I like, I like mixing R&R with Mt. Dew”

The last time I was in Lubbock, kids at Tech were mixing it with Gatorade.

**El Chupacabra** · 02-01-2009, 09:16 AM

On the chairlift, Mt. Rose, yesterday:

Non-helmet-wearing snowboarder (on regular soft-boot setup snowboard, not hard boot setup): I like to come up here early when the runs are icy, so I can go fast.
Snowboarder buddy of his: How fast?
NHWS: I hit 70mph this morning, easy.
SBOH: Really? Wow, man, that's fast.
NHWS: On Kit Carson, I usually cruise along about 50-60, but then it gets crowded, so I have to slow down.

Kit Carson = giant wide mellow blue run...

**skiingsamurai** · 02-01-2009, 10:47 AM

yesterday at stowe a friend of mine was going to huck the waterfall. a 25-30 footer to flat. Personally Ill never do it because I like being 5'10'', and not compressed.
My friend was at the top looking for a landing zone, and these gapers were yelling at him to do it.
Gaper1: "Do it, the landing is so soft"
Gaper2: "Yeah, I just hucked it and im fine."
Me: "The landing is flat as shit and all bombed out right now, its not OK.
Gaper1:" just aim between the bomb holes"
Me:" funny, that big one looks kinda like someone fell sideways, and didnt stomp it"
Gaper2 (helmet caked with snow)" ...Do it man, the landings good"

nothing annoys me more than morons egging a total stranger on to huck something that has a flat bombed out landing