All things gaper?

[djtnut]

anyone wanna start contributing photographic documentation? here's me with high helmet, low goggs: http://dtepper.smugmug.com/gallery/4...84519531_SyZjX

[Ted Striker]

Try again with the pic^^^^^^^^^

[mrw]

PBD- premature bar down

I get clobbered by this asshole at least once a season.

[Ted Striker]

You forgot "shaped skis", as in, "what kind of skis do you have?"

As for long straight skis, I gotta disagree. I've seen some dudes absolutely ripping on longboards at Baker, Crystal, Red, Whitewater, etc. And not for the irony either, judging by the way they dressed.

[brannen]

backscratchers kick ass buddy


is this a gaper gap.....?


the texas tuck


fartbags


and, New Yorkers who wear jerseys...

[Thrill Hammer]

never gets old

[yippeekiyayMF]

leashes rock! you must not have fun friends that would take any advantage to throw your snowboard down a slope while you are not strapped in.

i really pity you and your boring friends.

[Spartacus087]

Decent list but there are a few things that have been mentioned that make you seem like the gaper.

edit: and the gaper quote thread pretty much covers every imaginable aspect of gaperdom

[gramboh]

These one bug me:

"Powder hound"
"Powder puff" (WTF)

[buckethead]

still a few i haven't seen mentioned:

speed suits on portly middle age dudes...add points for mooseknuckle

fur or dinosaur fins on helmet

folks who can hardly stand on their skis sliding down steep double black (regularly seen on outer limits at k-mart) on their arses...add if they wear an "i skiied outer limits" shirt

custom-embroidered fartbags

water bottle holsters

shaped skis with ridiculous sidecut

folks who complain that the pow hasn't been groomed

long johns+full winter gear when it's really hot out

agree with pisteoff: i see lots of folks ripping on the straight and long...i'm always glad to see some nice vintage gear on the hill, especially if they've got nice binders on 'em...

(i prefer the term binder - as opposed to releaser - guess i'm a gaper too.)

[Gnu]

Lets not forget the gaper hats. Those big frily, colorful jester looking things. Most of the time these will be seen on kids, but if you let your grom out in one of those damn things, you my friend are a gaper!

[Jag]

I don't understand why you wouldn't have a leash on, anything can happen to your equipment when you bite-it. Why would anyone risk injuring or killing a child down hill, they are required for a reason.
Whats wrong with wearing a fanny pack if your out for the day, its better than wearing a big pack at a lifted resort, now thats gaper.
As far as straight skis go, I see allot of ass kicking straight skiers out there.

[A Random Skier]

Trying to look intelligent by hand-flexing a ski and then making a gaperish comment about the flex.

[Tunco]

apres booting/dancing in ski boots

Ever been drunk in Yurp?

frooty booty

Drop the Y, its JONGy.

blocking the lift exit slope

Yes, people who use the word 'slope' strike me as gaperish.

straight skis unless it's long board day

Man up and ski a pair.

"daffy"
"backscratcher"
"helicopter"

Wayne Wong can kick your ass.

[The word Gaper is overused]

HEY LOOK AT ME!

[powderhound100]

These one bug me:

"Powder hound"
"Powder puff" (WTF)

haha screw you.

and also for snowboarders thinking their good side slipping down double blacks,
or for teenage snowboard girls, the famous slide 2 feet, talk, slide 2 feet, talk

[djtnut]

i think we all gape from time to time...

[Deep Days]

Trying to look intelligent by hand-flexing a ski and then making a gaperish comment about the flex.

Yesssss!

At Ski Rex this past year, I was curious about the flex of a Nordica Enforcer. Some "rad dude" comes up to me (trying to sell me the skis, probably) saying, "That's a pretty burly ski, huh?" Without even thinking or considering being cordial or tactful, I blurt out, "Uh, not really. But good try."

Squatch witnessed it and thought the inadvertent assholery was slightly tittilating.

Damn I wish I had some pictures from when I was little to add to this thread. I used to ski with a HUGE inbounds pack. I kept paper and a lighter in my pack "in case I got lost [inbounds, mind you] and had to build a fire for the night". Now that's a fucking gaper! I carried a shovel inbounds every day I skied, and I also carried an avy probe, without truly knowing what it was for. No beacon either. I thought that if I got slid and buried, I could just take off my pack underneath the snow, get out the avy probe, and poke around in different directions until I found out which way was up.

So... those aren't very common attributes, but they would indeed be attributes of a gaper.

"Can you ski blacks?!"

I always get a kick out of, "Whoa, they're like WATER SKIS!" in regards to my Lotus 120s (not even full reverse-reverse). I usually reply, "obviously, you're not a golfer."

I would like to add that a common gaper tactic is to try as hard as possible not to fill the chairs, ESPECIALLY when the line is 20-minutes long. Whether thats their own faults or the fault of the lifty is up for debate, but that reeeeally pisses me off. I don't even think it's funny--just annoying.

Obviously I'm being a little hypocritical passing judgment on these people, considering my history, so I can't hate on them. I can, and do, however, get irked or get some chuckles.

[PowStompper]

I realize that the Texans do gape it up on the hill(ie. texas tuck,texas suitcase), but I'm sure that we all look like gapers in the flatness of the South land, Besides that aren't you afraid of offending this guy?

[Hover bacon]

apres booting/dancing in ski boots


Just what on earth is wrong with this hmmm? Do u go home and change ur shoes and clothes, then put your goggles back on ur head upside down to go back to the apres ski?

[karpiel]

According to google, this is a gaper

[ski3 P O]

haha, i don't ski in MA and if i did i'd definitely have to push up my helmet and lower my goggs.

......and skins in my dakine pack...

Uh, that was gay.

[ski3 P O]

so what did i miss? anyone have more of these to contribute?

How about this one:

1. Coming on to the forum and starting a thread about what a gaper is.

[Diamond Joe]

"daffy"
"backscratcher"
"helicopter"

That's like saying Hot Dogs suck. This is where the true rad lies. Shame, shame..

Seriously. Stop dissing old-school tricks

[Diamond Joe]

whoops missed this, somebody else defending the timeless appeal of a well-executed back scratcher

backscratchers kick ass buddy