Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

[Cliff Huckable]

Two snowboarders, about 21:

Boarder 1: "I hate powder."
Boarder 2: "Yeah. Except to land in."
Boarder 1: "Except to land in."

[blndbmbshll]

Was trying out a new boyfriend, was pretty psyched when he said that he skied until I asked him what he was on:

"Shaped skis!"

Not the answer I was looking for. End of relationship.

[Nathan Explosion]

New boyfriend, was pretty psyched that he said he skied until I asked him what he rode:

"Shaped skis!"

Not the answer I was looking for. End of relationship.

193 4FRNT EHP sound better?

[Arelius19]

Was trying out a new boyfriend, was pretty psyched when he said that he skied until I asked him what he was on:

"Shaped skis!"

Not the answer I was looking for. End of relationship.

excellent.

[Badgerman]

I was trying out a new girlfriend......internet thing......blackberry on the lift.......asked her if her ass fit in a fifty gallon drum.......she said "no way"

wrong answer......end of relationship

[Lev]

I was trying out a new girlfriend......internet thing......blackberry on the lift.......asked her if her ass fit in a fifty gallon drum.......she said "no way"

wrong answer......end of relationship

Better luck next time Badgerman. That sounds rough. You should touch base with Blndbmbshel

[Mgof]

had some folks ask me if the moment ruby's are racing skis, and one fella ask how do i ski powder w/ them (bump above the troll shit)

[DharmaBum]

Was that on Bobs Knob @ bogus by any chance?

Yep......

[123ski]

At least you have a good attitude. Just because you all post on the tetongravity forums doesn't make you any better than the Gaper that is out there for the first time.

I bet you all have been in a position at some point in your life where you were a newb, gaper, jong, etc.

Yes, the shit they say can and is funny, but rather than hold them out as some sort of charactitures of themselves, embrace that perhaps that they are not as all knowing or awesome as you.

Just sayin'.

Yes, but I was 5....

[gaijin]

"discuss..."

[pinto]

I am normally a mere lurker, but this made me think of this thread:

Yesterday morning at Copper, in a light snowfall, a woman with her son asked me, "Are we allowed to ski while it's snowing?

[Eleventy]

"Are we allowed to ski while it's snowing?

That just seems reckless to me.

[xXReaPaFieDXx]

i was riding up the lift with a couple and they were looking at my skis ( line invaders ) then looked at me and said "did you paint those yourself?"

[Phill]

Was wondering how the Dukes hold up over time (20+ days), in terms of torsional rigidity. I personally favor "hard mounted" bindings. I currently have the Jesters on my Gotamas and love them. I have a pr of Dukes and was considering putting them on a pair of Monster 88's. I have no intention of touring with them, but the Dukes higher stand height on my M88's sound intriguing to me since that is my ski when I'm not on the goats.

My concern: After 20 days of hard skiing on groomers/hardpack the Dukes might get "sloppy". Any thoughts or comments are appreciated.

from the home of gaper quotes

[Craven Morehead]

i was riding up the lift with a couple and they were looking at my skis ( line invaders ) then looked at me and said "did you paint those yourself?"

I paint mine.

[P_McPoser]

i was riding up the lift with a couple and they were looking at my skis ( line invaders ) then looked at me and said "did you paint those yourself?"

http://www.tetongravity.com/forums/s...=Painting+Skis

[doublediamond223]

Well, the conversation I had with one of my friends after he came back from his road trip to Utah for spring break qualifies as a whole string of quotes. At first, I was pissed that he didn't tell me that they were going, since I, too enjoy staying in SLC for free.

.... I then found out that they skied one black all week, and that was by mistake. I quickly reassessed the situation, and was quite glad they did not invite me. Skiing blues at snowbird would not have sat well with me.

The pictures really tell the story better than the rest of the conversation.

My friend's new profile picture

He is one of my best friends, and doesn't know any better, so I restrained myself. But I still felt obligated to show him what an actual tuck consists of.

However, I lost my restraint when I saw this:

"Dude, what the FUCK is Trobee doing with his skis off in the middle of a bowl?"

The response, "Oh, well his boots were cutting off circulation to his foot, so he slid down for a while."

I sat there in shock for a moment, trying to fathom how this seemed to be a logical idea, and then I saw another picture that explained the situation:



He had managed to put his left pant leg inside the boot not just once, but EVERY SINGLE DAY that they skied. No wonder he couldn't feel his foot...

[back_east]

First of all... that tuck picture posted above is beautiful.

as for gaper quote... it wasn't last weekend, but it is clear as yesterday:

parking lot at squaw, nuking snow and blowing wind. guy parked next to us looks up at the hill engulfed in a cloud and turns to his buddy "what do you think? Goggles or shades today?"

[GrassHPer]

I have been asked twice before completely earnestly whether my bindings were broken when I was standing in the lift line in tele skis.

[G]

Was trying out a new boyfriend, was pretty psyched when he said that he skied until I asked him what he was on:

"Shaped skis!"

Not the answer I was looking for. End of relationship.

Heh, I usually give the same answer.

I guess I should upgrade my response a little, I might actually get laid.

[Eleventy]

I don't know what it is about low viz that makes people want to kill themselves, but... This masterpiece of gaperdom gets off the tram today, carries her skinny-ass straight skis across her chest, and walks directly to the Moonlight sign-out shack, which, incidentally, is way out of the way. She was clearly going to click in, and ski whatever was below her.

Me: Do you know where you're going?
Her: Nope!
Me: Well, this is double-black, sign-out, scary stuff.
Her: Oh.
Me: You want Liberty Bowl.. Over there. Follow the green circles down.
Her: Wow, Thanks!

Saved another life...

[cliffhucker]

double diamon 223 -that PoleVault girl avatar, did you post that on the snowbank thread, do u even pole vault? just curious, I do, and yes she is beutiful

[leftfield]

Was trying out a new boyfriend, was pretty psyched when he said that he skied until I asked him what he was on:

"Shaped skis!"

Not the answer I was looking for. End of relationship.

Amen sister.

[Erls]

Kind of similar thing happened to me at peak 7 in Breck. Lift lines are all merging. Group in front of me goes, then the group next to me goes, then I and my wife and two kids pull out. The women in the line next to me asks why did I cut her off? I told her I didn't cut her off, I merged. As the lines come together, you are supposed to alternate. She shakes her lift ticket and me, and says nowhere on it does it say the lift lines alternate. The lifty standing there tells her she is correct, it does not say it anywhere on the lift ticket. She then smiles at me. Then the lifty goes on to tell her it says to alternate on the BIG YELLOW SIGN SHE IS STANDING RIGHT NEXT TO! I then smile and proceed to go on to the lift.

I love that type or person...

I've got a couple stories like that, but here's my favorite:

I'm leading my class down the catwalk from under Chaos Canyon to Chair 2 (Vail). While I'm stopped to wait for them all, I see this kid (not one of mine) ski up out of control and turn into the backside of a boarder (who was maybe using the far right 5 feet of the catwalk, total. The kids mother proceeds to ski up and start laying into the boarder, blaming him because her kid is now crying. After she points at me 3 or 4 times, saying that I am going to pull his pass, I get tired of the BS and head on over...

Me: Ma'am, whats the problem here?
Her: You saw this jerk ride into my kid, pull his pass!
Me: Actually, ma'am, your kid skied into him.
Her: But he flipped over my kid and hurt him. Pull his pass, he's unsafe!
Me: Actually, according to the Skier's Responsibility Code your child is the one at fault, as he was behind the snowboarder here and is supposed to ski around him.
Her: But my kid is just learning, he can't be expected to turn around people.
Me: Then I would suggest that you go up to Chair 15 and the magic carpets until he learns how to.
Her: But then he can't ski the mountain and have fun. Besides, that responsible code thing is not on my lift ticket and I was not told about it. So he can't be held accountable.
Me: Actually, he can. By buying that ticket and using the chairlifts you agree to the Code, as well as accept all liability associated with skiing. In fact, a couple years ago a young kid was sued for running into a senior citizen and injuring his shoulder. Something like 70 grand is the amount the kid is being sued over.
Her: Thats dumb, he's just a kid.
Me: That may be, but if he will not follow the code and ski responsibly, he'll get his pass pulled. If you have any questions, feel free to ask any Ski Patroller, Yellow Jacket, or any other employee.

Quote from today (Vail).

Standing at the base of the Mountain (Lionshead) before work, I overhear a family walking by:

Dad: "This snow is horrible. We come out here to have those amazing groomers and sunshine, not this horrible weather and all this bad snow."
Mom: "Lets just go inside for the day, tomorrow will be better."
Dad: "Actually, I think its supposed to snow all day and night."
Mom: "I hate this. Lets just go home, the skiing is horrible this year."

[doublediamond223]

double diamon 223 -that PoleVault girl avatar, did you post that on the snowbank thread, do u even pole vault? just curious, I do, and yes she is beutiful

No idea what thread you mean. A thread about her was posted by SuPu a while back on here. No, I don't pole vault.