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Thread: I love my wife and all, but Jesus Hercules Christ...

  1. #7176
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    Feb 2005
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    Quote Originally Posted by AK47bp View Post
    Maybe tits in the world? Math checks out.


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    Even better.

  2. #7177
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    May 2002
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    Halfway Between the Gutter and the Stars
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    Quote Originally Posted by Harry View Post
    Betty White said it first.


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    That's what I was thinking

  3. #7178
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    May 2002
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    Quote Originally Posted by plugboots View Post
    This is almost word for word Tina Fey’s stand up routine.
    Yina Fey. Fucking children in here

  4. #7179
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    Feb 2005
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    My wife and I moved to Savannah, GA a few years ago to help take care of her parents. It's been a tough few years and now my mother in law remains. She is the best and is turning 92 on Wednesday. I asked my wife, who is retired, if she wanted to go to Connecticut on 8/16 to see Dark Star Orchestra for our anniversary. Kind of a Dead themed road trip like we used to do. You know, get the hell out of the south for a few days. She told me she had to look at her schedule and we would discuss this later. What the fuck? She's retired. What's on her schedule? When she was working she would drop EVERYTHING for a Dead show or a Rat Dog show, or a Phil show, or a DSO show. The fuck?

  5. #7180
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    That simply means she couldn't think of a solid reason to say no, and will get back you when she has a good one..

  6. #7181
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    I'll have the tickets in hand and hotel booked by then. Looks like Im going to DSO solo!!

  7. #7182
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    Jan 2016
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    Greg_o
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    That's the spirit!!

  8. #7183
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    Mar 2005
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    Yonder
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    ^^^ it’s the driving. And leaving whatever is your home. I feel it more every year. Home body
    Quiet.
    Used to think nothing of driving cross country.
    Now I hate driving to the mountain. And then I get there and skiing is fun.
    No way I would drive from GA to CT for a show.

    Ps. Just noticed it’s your anniversary. You are fucked. What about a hotel getaway on the ocean?
    Kill all the telemarkers
    But they’ll put us in jail if we kill all the telemarkers
    Telemarketers! Kill the telemarketers!
    Oh we can do that. We don’t even need a reason

  9. #7184
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    Feb 2005
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    I make the trip from Savannah to NYC quite often. Sometimes I fly for a quick hit (broken drilling equipment that need to be pulled off site and replaced with a functional unit happens between 0100-0500) but for most of the time its customer visits or training crews/operators. I like to bring a road bike with me for the NYC rides with my old crew so flying becomes an issue. Im all about the fun I can have while on the road working and that requires gear of some sort. The bonus is that I can conveniently position myself almost anywhere in the country with just a little notice and this comes in handy for big dumps, good surf, steelheading, or cycling, or a show. For a DSO anniversary show I can put the Old Ball And Chain in a first class seat and pick her up in Newark. Unless Im visiting family in Maine or Nova Scotia I don't really do the beach thing. My office is in Wilmington, NC and sometimes when I go there we'll get an Air BNB on the beach. My wife will sit on a beach ALL DAY.

  10. #7185
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    Nov 2005
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    Down In A Hole, Up in the Sky
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    I have never read this thread, so I don’t know if this was covered.
    My wife is brilliant: multiple advanced degrees in engineering, accounting, finance.
    She can plan to the penny reasonable investment and tax strategies, etc.
    I’m the dummy, truly.
    HOWEVER: no matter how I try and explain it to her, she can’t fathom (or care) whether the car will be in the burning, roasting sun by the afternoon/evening. You know, how to forecast if the shade of buildings and trees will make it much more pleasant to get into the car at a later point in time.
    It baffles me to no end.
    Forum Cross Pollinator, gratuitously strident

  11. #7186
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    Feb 2005
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    2,032
    Women don't think of those things. My wife will want to park next to the front door of a store in the blazing heat while I'll park under a shady tree a little further away. she will howl about the extra thirty feet of walking.

  12. #7187
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    Sep 2005
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    Quote Originally Posted by rideit View Post
    I have never read this thread
    sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion.
    "fuck off you asshat gaper shit for brains fucktard wanker." - Jesus Christ
    "She was tossing her bean salad with the vigor of a Drunken Pop princess so I walked out of the corner and said.... "need a hand?"" - Odin
    "everybody's got their hooks into you, fuck em....forge on motherfuckers, drag all those bitches across the goal line with you." - (not so) ill-advised strategy

  13. #7188
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    Jan 2005
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    Access to Granlibakken
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  14. #7189
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    Dec 2016
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    In a van... down by the river
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    Quote Originally Posted by frorider View Post
    I'd humbly suggest if she needs to attend such a camp, perhaps her husband is not the correct choice for her...

  15. #7190
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    Dec 2012
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    I can still smell Poutine.
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    Can one of them stop screaming long enough to make me a sammich?

  16. #7191
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    Feb 2012
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    Quote Originally Posted by riser4 View Post
    Can one of them stop screaming long enough to make me a sammich?
    Name:  Image1719938494.864675.jpg
Views: 520
Size:  73.8 KB



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  17. #7192
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    Feb 2005
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    Quote Originally Posted by frorider View Post
    No man would ever be good or fulfilling enough for women who result to that. Easy answer is to divorce your husband and marry another woman. Those are some angry people in that video.

  18. #7193
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    Dec 2012
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    I can still smell Poutine.
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    Quote Originally Posted by AK47bp View Post
    Name:  Image1719938494.864675.jpg
Views: 520
Size:  73.8 KB



    Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums
    Oh, I most certainly did.

  19. #7194
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    3,313
    I believe converting CTRL-ALT-DLT to the correct syntax for women is "Calm down." Give it a try to those women in that Instagram post. Should work. If not, try reinstalling a new relationship.

  20. #7195
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    Oct 2003
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    Ogden
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    Last year we needed a new water heater. I told my wife what the price range would be, she agreed. I went and bought a water heater the next day and she lost her mind saying that I made a major decision about the house alone and that I should have consulted her. I guess she wanted to help pick specs on the replacement and fully get the details. Fine, agreed, we should operate that way.

    Fast forward to last month she said that we need to remodel the bathroom. I figure we'll have a deep discussion about costs, process, timing etc. before moving forward. Wrong....I come home from a weekend away and she has ripped half a wall out. I know that I should just bite my tongue, but I'll probably bring up the water heater discussion even though I know that this will be totally different for whatever reason. Wish me luck.

  21. #7196
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    Jan 2016
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    Greg_o
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    RIP.

  22. #7197
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    Feb 2005
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    Quote Originally Posted by zion zig zag View Post
    Last year we needed a new water heater. I told my wife what the price range would be, she agreed. I went and bought a water heater the next day and she lost her mind saying that I made a major decision about the house alone and that I should have consulted her. I guess she wanted to help pick specs on the replacement and fully get the details. Fine, agreed, we should operate that way.

    Fast forward to last month she said that we need to remodel the bathroom. I figure we'll have a deep discussion about costs, process, timing etc. before moving forward. Wrong....I come home from a weekend away and she has ripped half a wall out. I know that I should just bite my tongue, but I'll probably bring up the water heater discussion even though I know that this will be totally different for whatever reason. Wish me luck.
    If you rip a wall out in a burst of creative energy because you have been watching home remodeling shows on TV then you OWN it. She ownes that one.

  23. #7198
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    Dec 2010
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    5,079
    Quote Originally Posted by zion zig zag View Post
    Fast forward to last month she said that we need to remodel the bathroom. I figure we'll have a deep discussion about costs, process, timing etc. before moving forward. Wrong....I come home from a weekend away and she has ripped half a wall out. I know that I should just bite my tongue, but I'll probably bring up the water heater discussion even though I know that this will be totally different for whatever reason. Wish me luck.
    Is your wife someone who completes jobs in a timely fashion and cleans up well? Or will this drag on for months, and be left to you to figure out?


    Last year i came home to a part of our bedroom closet ripped out to the studs. Turns out, her grandfather had died the night before so decided to take the week off and remodel half the closet including putting in an upholstered bench. My wife is not one to complete a job in a timely fashion, and my toddler blows her away in his ability and enthusiasm when cleanup time comes. After 1 month, she finally completed the project (which was quicker than expected). And then for the next couple months after that i couldnt find this particular screwdriver with multiple driver heads. She finally sheepishly admitted that she had sewn the screwdriver into the upholstered bench the way a surgeon leaves a tool in a patient. I just walked out of the room, and bought a replacement at HD the next weekend. Not worth the hassle, on many levels.

  24. #7199
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    Oct 2003
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    Sandy
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    Quote Originally Posted by zion zig zag View Post
    I know that I should just bite my tongue, but I'll probably bring up the water heater discussion even though I know that this will be totally different for whatever reason. Wish me luck.
    You have to do it.
    It won’t end well.

  25. #7200
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    3,518
    Quote Originally Posted by zion zig zag View Post
    Last year we needed a new water heater. I told my wife what the price range would be, she agreed. I went and bought a water heater the next day and she lost her mind saying that I made a major decision about the house alone and that I should have consulted her. I guess she wanted to help pick specs on the replacement and fully get the details. Fine, agreed, we should operate that way.

    Fast forward to last month she said that we need to remodel the bathroom. I figure we'll have a deep discussion about costs, process, timing etc. before moving forward. Wrong....I come home from a weekend away and she has ripped half a wall out. I know that I should just bite my tongue, but I'll probably bring up the water heater discussion even though I know that this will be totally different for whatever reason. Wish me luck.
    Please tell me you have more than one bathroom

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