I love my wife and all, but Jesus Hercules Christ...

[Stuntmonkey]

I’m surrounded by women. No other dude in the house. Daily I’m floored by the complete lack of general awareness for surroundings by such dynamic and otherwise smart people.

Fire has gone out, pot on stove was turned on and just left, some kitchen appliance alarm beeps non stop, door wide open in 20 degree weather, every light on.

The fire thing yesterday broke the camels back and over dinner I told everyone that I’m no saint and I fuck stuff up but what I really want is for everyone to do the simple stuff. That’s it. I won’t get aggravated if you fuck up the hard stuff. Miss the diving catch in the outfield but don’t miss the cut off man.

I’m sure I’m in for a completely different experience from now on.

I feel this on a molecular level. I just want people to put their shit in the dedicated places that they asked me to build for them, and not on the fucking kitchen island. Utilities are 8x the normal cost right now due to the cogens offline, so maybe turn off the fucking lights when you leave the room?!

[nickwm21]

JFC. Got up this morning motivated to clean out our absolute disaster of a garage…. Like seriously hoarder, only fits the motorcycle, can barely walk type shit. Got started early by backing my truck up and just start throwing up shit in the bed that we haven’t looked at in years to take to the dump…. Mrs Seano comes out and has a meltdown, saying “I need to go THROUGH all of that”…. I casually say you’ve had ten years to go through all of that and here we are….Now I’m on the silent treatment list, but I did get two trips done….. Baby steps I guess.

There’s 1000 better ways for you to handle that operation. No sympathy on my end.


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[dan_pdx]

The door open thing makes me crazy. What's that all about?

[plugboots]

There’s 1000 better ways for you to handle that operation. No sympathy on my end.


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Mrs. Plug and I are on the same page with this one, we don't like clutter. That said I would never throw any of "her" shit out w/o her OK. I'd be dead.
Now she's even on a Swedish Death Cleaning kick, (https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/hom...eath-cleaning/). No surprise since she's an Estate Tax attorney, and sees estates dealing with dead folk's piles of crap, but man, I'm at the point I feel like I gotta wear that old t-shirt and make sure she sees it, or it's a gonner.

[nickwm21]

I’m amazed by the lack of acknowledgement of the correlation between the door being left open and the dog getting out…


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[BCMtnHound]

I have recently had to deal with the storage habits of the fairer sex. My loving wife is a bit of a hoarder. Sorting and releasing back to the void unnecessary clutter is a very emotional event for her. I am very much the opposite and if I hold an item, then it has a relatively immediate function and a place it is stored when no in use.

I recently just completed building a cold room in the basement for all our food storage. It was a long growing season last year and we put up more preserves than usual, such that the original space was overflowing, and not ideal for long-term storage of various dry and canned goods. So in went an insulated and temp controlled space (R10, and with the outside vents and fan I’ve got it down to a nice 6C). When I finished the shelving and was ready to fill the room, the first items she rushed to place in there was her empty jars and containers. I put a stop to that but held my cool. Took over the transfer of the food stuff, then allowed the extra food-related stuff to find home in the out-of-the-way corners. Fwd a few days and she comes back from a big shop in the city. Epsom salts were on sale so she bought a 6mo supply. Immediately she goes to store them in the cold room, despite the bottom bathroom having ample extra storage space. I might have been a little sharp when I reiterated my rule that only food and food related items may go in there. She mumbled under her breath but did as asked. We’ll see long term how it holds up.

[ötzi]

We lived in our first house 10 years. After we had lived in our second house for 10 years I decided that we weren't ever gonna need whatever was in the boxes in the basement that were still taped shut from the move 10 years before and decided to throw them out without even opening them. Just load them in the truck as is and take them to the dump. Whatever was in them we didn't need, was my view. I thought this was such an excellent plan that for some reason I told it to the wife. With predictable results.

As far as I could tell after all was said and done the only things we got rid of was the boxes that had been keeping it all contained and out of the way for 10 years.

[warthog]

I’m surrounded by women. No other dude in the house. Daily I’m floored by the complete lack of general awareness for surroundings by such dynamic and otherwise smart people.

Fire has gone out, pot on stove was turned on and just left, some kitchen appliance alarm beeps non stop, door wide open in 20 degree weather, every light on.

The fire thing yesterday broke the camels back and over dinner I told everyone that I’m no saint and I fuck stuff up but what I really want is for everyone to do the simple stuff. That’s it. I won’t get aggravated if you fuck up the hard stuff. Miss the diving catch in the outfield but don’t miss the cut off man.

I’m sure I’m in for a completely different experience from now on.


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Same.

I will add- How can you park the truck in a different position every time? Most times, there is not enough room for even the dog to get by the front of the vehicle to the other side of the garage (my side). Other times, you could drive three bikes through the space. If the garage door can go down with that much space, why pull so far in? I tried the tennis ball trick. Literally came out many times to the tennis ball and string at a 30-40 degree angle, and the car parked just as close. This is mind boggling. Drive in until the tennis ball hits the windshield. Then STOP. The end. This is a smart person. I wouldn't marry a dummy. I am baffled.

Doors wide open is just as big a problem here, but for very different reasons. Humid as hell 7-8 months a year. Door wide open, no one around. Later that evening, "Are you hot? It's hot in here."
*air gets turned down.
Also- "Oh my god, there is another palmetto bug ( FL slang for giant ass roach- oh, and they fly too) in the house. I just don't know how they keep getting in."
I get that from all 3 women in the house.
The girl dog does not seem to mind any of it though, and I am her favorite. So there is that.

[Art Shirk]

I built a new linen closet so my wife could have one of those closets you see in a pottery barn ad, with cute little baskets and hooks and neatly folded linens. Now it’s a storage bin full of random shit.

I built my wife and entire raised shelving system up in the attic to get things off the floor and organize the stuff we already have. Now it’s a place to dump new stuff we never needed.

I built my wife an entire garden center in one of the stable stalls so she could perform tasks like potting and building table centerpieces that she would see on Etsy. Now it’s full of stuff she found on the side of the road like busted pallets and broken chairs.

I built my wife an elevated reading nook and bookshelf with one of those sliding ladder. Now it has boxes of clothes in it.

I built myself an entire shelving system in the garage for garage things. Now it’s full of the Christmas stuff that was supposed to be to be in the attic.

I built out the pantry room so we could neatly organize sundries and food stuffs. It now resembles an entire Whole Foods supermarket that was destroyed by an earthquake.

I built my wife a chicken run to protect the chickens after they were getting picked off by yotes. She planted roses IN THE CHICKEN RUN and then had me cordon them off because she couldn’t believe they were being eaten.

And the coup de fucking grace, I built custom planter boxes for what I thought would be herbs and other veggies to eat. When I came back from a business trip, she had planted PUMPKINS that ended up completely overrunning the entire area, rotting and attracting the coyotes that were eating our chickens.

I’m here all week for more storage area venting stories if anyone wants to feel better about themselves.


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[ötzi]

@warthog Yeah I tried the tennis ball trick with the same results. Pretty much blew my mind. Finally I took the thing down so I wouldn't keep seeing it.

[old goat]

I built a new linen closet so my wife could have one of those closets you see in a pottery barn ad, with cute little baskets and hooks and neatly folded linens. Now it’s a storage bin full of random shit.

I built my wife and entire raised shelving system up in the attic to get things off the floor and organize the stuff we already have. Now it’s a place to dump new stuff we never needed.

I built my wife an entire garden center in one of the stable stalls so she could perform tasks like potting and building table centerpieces that she would see on Etsy. Now it’s full of stuff she found on the side of the road like busted pallets and broken chairs.

I built my wife an elevated reading nook and bookshelf with one of those sliding ladder. Now it has boxes of clothes in it.

I built myself an entire shelving system in the garage for garage things. Now it’s full of the Christmas stuff that was supposed to be to be in the attic.

I built out the pantry room so we could neatly organize sundries and food stuffs. It now resembles an entire Whole Foods supermarket that was destroyed by an earthquake.

I built my wife a chicken run to protect the chickens after they were getting picked off by yotes. She planted roses IN THE CHICKEN RUN and then had me cordon them off because she couldn’t believe they were being eaten.

And the coup de fucking grace, I built custom planter boxes for what I thought would be herbs and other veggies to eat. When I came back from a business trip, she had planted PUMPKINS that ended up completely overrunning the entire area, rotting and attracting the coyotes that were eating our chickens.

I’m here all week for more storage area venting stories if anyone wants to feel better about themselves.


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An annoying amount of storage space in our house is occupied by xmas stuff. It's a shame we lost the war on xmas. And the war on Thanksgiving. And the war on Halloween. Fortunately we don't decorate for MLK Day. Yet.

[plugboots]

Dang, goat. I never thought it was us husbands that lost the war in Xmas. Mind: 🤯

[Bunion 2020]

I built a new linen closet so my wife could have one of those closets you see in a pottery barn ad, with cute little baskets and hooks and neatly folded linens. Now it’s a storage bin full of random shit.

I built my wife and entire raised shelving system up in the attic to get things off the floor and organize the stuff we already have. Now it’s a place to dump new stuff we never needed.

I built my wife an entire garden center in one of the stable stalls so she could perform tasks like potting and building table centerpieces that she would see on Etsy. Now it’s full of stuff she found on the side of the road like busted pallets and broken chairs.

I built my wife an elevated reading nook and bookshelf with one of those sliding ladder. Now it has boxes of clothes in it.

I built myself an entire shelving system in the garage for garage things. Now it’s full of the Christmas stuff that was supposed to be to be in the attic.

I built out the pantry room so we could neatly organize sundries and food stuffs. It now resembles an entire Whole Foods supermarket that was destroyed by an earthquake.

I built my wife a chicken run to protect the chickens after they were getting picked off by yotes. She planted roses IN THE CHICKEN RUN and then had me cordon them off because she couldn’t believe they were being eaten.

And the coup de fucking grace, I built custom planter boxes for what I thought would be herbs and other veggies to eat. When I came back from a business trip, she had planted PUMPKINS that ended up completely overrunning the entire area, rotting and attracting the coyotes that were eating our chickens.

I’m here all week for more storage area venting stories if anyone wants to feel better about themselves.


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With a bit of work that could be a C&W song.

[Nobody Famous]

Email from today:

The same crazy skier hit me not once but TWICE in one week.

So, I'm up at my home mountain with my child a couple weeks ago, skiing in some of my favorite tree areas, well off the groomers.

The snow wasn't perfect, but it was pretty good. I take a little drop (maybe 4-5') and then realize I'm not gonna make the turn fast enough before hitting the tree in front of me, so I bail out and end up on my side.

I start picking myself up, and I hear a yell, and then my face SLAMS into the snow.

This crazy skier was at the top of the drop, and dropped down, and hit me in the back of my head with their ski. They apologize for a bit, and after I literally pull my face back out of the snow, and tell them it's okay. It didn't hurt that bad, but it was quite unexpected to go from thinking I'm standing up, to having a ski go up my neck and hit my in the helmet. My kiddo laughed quite a bit, thinking it was quite funny.

So, just 6 days later, I'm at the same mountain, again in the trees, this time skiing basically by myself. I found a great chunk of powder, and I'm getting ready to drop into it. Right before I can, THE SAME SKIER hits my at pretty good speed, and even put the butt of their ski pole right into the middle of my lower back and backside. This time is HURTS. I have two pretty large bruises. They actually managed to shove me into a 6ft tall tree while they're doing it.

They again apologize profusely, and I try to take it in stride. But it was cold, and it honestly hurt a lot. I don't bruise easily, and I have two 6" wide bruises on my lower back and hip.

I'm not sure if this skier is safe to be around other skiers.

So, what I'm wondering is if I should report my wife to Ski Patrol, or just let it go?

[Gcooker]

I built a new linen closet so my wife could have one of those closets you see in a pottery barn ad, with cute little baskets and hooks and neatly folded linens. Now it’s a storage bin full of random shit.

I built my wife and entire raised shelving system up in the attic to get things off the floor and organize the stuff we already have. Now it’s a place to dump new stuff we never needed.

I built my wife an entire garden center in one of the stable stalls so she could perform tasks like potting and building table centerpieces that she would see on Etsy. Now it’s full of stuff she found on the side of the road like busted pallets and broken chairs.

I built my wife an elevated reading nook and bookshelf with one of those sliding ladder. Now it has boxes of clothes in it.

I built myself an entire shelving system in the garage for garage things. Now it’s full of the Christmas stuff that was supposed to be to be in the attic.

I built out the pantry room so we could neatly organize sundries and food stuffs. It now resembles an entire Whole Foods supermarket that was destroyed by an earthquake.

I built my wife a chicken run to protect the chickens after they were getting picked off by yotes. She planted roses IN THE CHICKEN RUN and then had me cordon them off because she couldn’t believe they were being eaten.

And the coup de fucking grace, I built custom planter boxes for what I thought would be herbs and other veggies to eat. When I came back from a business trip, she had planted PUMPKINS that ended up completely overrunning the entire area, rotting and attracting the coyotes that were eating our chickens.

I’m here all week for more storage area venting stories if anyone wants to feel better about themselves.


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POTY candidate right there….

[BCMtnHound]

Damn Art. Disrepecting your efforts at beautifying her space is one thing. But taking family investments or space like the garage and coop and completely making them non-functional is another. I would have ended up in that other thread. You are a far more patient and forgiving man than I.

I feel better now. This thread is truly a support group. You all have my gratitude.

[ötzi]

Email from today:

Ha.

[Name Redacted]

Years ago, I stopped going into the crawl space unless I absolutely had to (it is 5.5' tall, you can actually walk in it not crawl, it is about 35' x 35' dirt floor) Gives me panic attacks to see all the shit stuffed down there. I hate decorations of any kind but have a particular dislike of Christmas decorations. We have a ton of them down there. Also, tires, old school books from pilot, dental, business, medical school, glassware from a million brewery events, cases of undrinkable beer aged too long, perfectly good dog begs and crates that are no longer used, paint and stain for every room in the house. You get the point.

Well, now the wife has decided that the whole crawlspace needs to be cleaned and reorganized, and we need to get radon mitigation done, which I have been saying since we bought the house and before we started stuffing shit down there. Here we go.

[skaredshtles]

it is 5.5" tall, you can actually walk in it not crawl,

What kind of tiny person are you?!?

[riser4]

What has it got in it's pocketses...

[PB]

What has it got in it's pocketses...

PERFECT!!

[old goat]

My wife has been kind enough to let me have our small garage for a woodshop. She even wired it for 110 (not enough amps though) and 220 (probably not allowed by code) for me. But maintaining the space free of stuff she wants to store there "temporarily" is an ongoing task. Which I do not complain about. Although I might mention it when she puts something wet on the cast iron table saw top.

[Name Redacted]

I bitch about the wife's crawlspace but my garage is pretty insane. Workbench alone has cause friends of mine to have to walk away due to the pile of clutter. It works for me though. Sure, maybe I have ADHD. Maaaaaybbbbeeee

[oftpiste]

I'm dying to know what the response was....

The fire thing yesterday broke the camels back and over dinner I told everyone that I’m no saint and I fuck stuff up but what I really want is for everyone to do the simple stuff. That’s it. I won’t get aggravated if you fuck up the hard stuff. Miss the diving catch in the outfield but don’t miss the cut off man.

[dan_pdx]

What has it got in it's pocketses...

😂