From the NY Times:
Mikaela Shiffrin Plans Return to World Cup Racing
March 5, 2020, 10:54 a.m. ET
In the first week of February, as Mikaela Shiffrin sat in a Colorado bedroom preparing a video tribute to her father, Jeff Shiffrin, who had died after a home accident days earlier, the surrounding mountains filled with snow.
Shiffrin had stepped away from the World Cup circuit, where she is the three-time reigning champion; the absence has stretched to six weeks as she and the family focused on their loss.
Shiffrin sifted through 112 hours of home movies, editing them into a 20-minute video to be shown at a private memorial service for Jeff, who was 65.
“Instead of me speaking, I wanted everyone to see the dad we knew — to hear his voice and to hear him laughing,” Shiffrin, a two-time Olympic ski racing champion, said in a telephone interview Tuesday night.
“But the snow kept coming down and we thought: Did my dad, who loved skiing after a big storm, send this?” Shiffrin said. “It was like he was saying, ‘Why are you spending your time on this thing about me? Get out and ski.’”
The next day, with her mother, Eileen, her older brother, Taylor, and some family friends, Shiffrin ventured onto the Vail Valley mountain trails where her parents taught her to ski.
“We did it more for Dad than anything,” Shiffrin said. “It did reset some things. We needed it.”
While she had not seriously considered whether she would return to the World Cup this season, three days after the casual ski outing with her family, Shiffrin resumed race training.
“I got to a point where I don’t think I could live with myself if I didn’t try to get back in the start gate,” said Shiffrin.
On Thursday, she plans to fly to Sweden to ready herself for three races next week in Are, the country’s leading site for Alpine skiing. The season-ending World Cup finals, where Shiffrin could race as many as five times, are scheduled for March 18 to 22 in Cortina d’Ampezzo, Italy, if organizing officials do not cancel the event because of coronavirus concerns.
“Maybe it’s something to make me feel closer to him,” Shiffrin said of returning to competition, adding that she liked to think her father would somehow be watching her performance. “Maybe it helps my mom feel closer to him. If it doesn’t, then we come back home.”
The decision to return to racing is the first concrete step Shiffrin, who will turn 25 on March 13, has taken as she contemplates her new reality. The past month has been a whirlwind.
“We really haven’t started the grieving process,” she said. “We are sort of existing.”
When Mikaela and Eileen, who has in the past acted as her daughter’s coach and traveling companion, received the news of Jeff’s accident on Feb. 1 while training in Europe, it took them several hours to arrange a flight to Denver. After driving five hours, they ended up in the Munich airport and were standing in line waiting to board when in the periphery of their vision they saw a tall man approaching them.
“Mikaela and I were holding hands, arm in arm, just in shock and shaking,” said Eileen, who feared they would be asked to talk about ski racing at an inopportune time.
The man was Bode Miller, America’s most decorated male skier, who was on the same flight. He walked up wordlessly and hugged Mikaela.
Returning from Europe, the Shiffrins, along with a host of other family and friends, were at the Denver hospital where Jeff, a leading anesthesiologist in the area, had been transported.
“He was truly surrounded by love,” Mikaela said of her father’s last moments on Feb. 2. The family has declined to reveal details of the incident; a coroner ruled it an accident and listed the cause of death as a head injury.
Once they were back in the Colorado mountains, Shiffrin said, planning for the memorial reception consumed the time after Jeff’s death, as did handling the many financial and legal details that needed to be sorted out.
“Everyone asks us if we’re OK,” Shiffrin said. “My dad’s attitude was always that you’ve got to keep going, you’ve got to keep learning and improving. That’s what we’re doing. We haven’t at all come to terms with whatever this new reality is. It still seems like an alternate reality.”
In recent days, the Shiffrins have begun enlarging photos of Jeff to 20 inches by 36 inches and positioning them around their Colorado home.
“At first, I didn’t want to look at pictures, because I didn’t want to feel the pain,” Mikaela said. “But then you get through that part, and you still feel a little sad, but the overwhelming, huge piece is that we’re so incredibly grateful that he was our dad, that he was my mom’s husband, that he was ours.
“The best way to honor someone’s memory is to be so grateful that they existed in your life.”
In the Munich airport last month, after hugging a crying Mikaela for several minutes, Miller was asked by the Shiffrins how he knew of Jeff’s accident since they had told only family and close associates. Miller, Mikaela’s ski racing hero while growing up, replied that he had not known about their loss.
“Bode said he saw us and could just tell something wasn’t right,” Eileen said. “I mean, of all people. Of all times.”
In 2018, Miller’s 19-month-old daughter, Emmy, accidentally drowned in a neighbor’s pool. Five years earlier, Miller’s younger brother, Chelone, had died of an apparent seizure.
Aware that Miller and his wife, Morgan, have since become water safety advocates and have continued to grow their family, Mikaela called the chance meeting calming, even inspirational. She saw hope when all there had been was despair.
“Just seeing Bode right then,” Shiffrin said, “and he didn’t say anything at first, but it was like: No, it’s not OK, you’re not OK. But in the same sense, it’s going to be OK.”
Bookmarks