
Originally Posted by
ill-advised strategy
It's against the ostensible rules and against any wisdom I should have from all these years of interacting with people through the internet, but seriously, this whole recent big picture of "bobby stainless" on tgr makes me genuinely depressed.
I fought off a real suicidal wave yesterday, I've been doing that here and there since around 2005 so no big news, but man, trying to figure out what's really going on and sort it out I think reading all of this has put my life and my stuff in such a hopeless light. Some of it is likely adverse effect of a steroid injection into my spine this week, they say it can affect depression. But also some of it is seeing this douche just nonstop bragging about how awesome he is and just being a dick like it's a sport.
So, if all this is completely real and honest, here's a guy who's just kind of a dick and he gets to have a dream job making a ton of money, totally sure he's the shit, really very little to worry about. Just like the president, and all of his appointees, just sociopaths with so much money they have nothing to worry about and they spend their time going out of their way to make regular people feel awful. I know on an intellectual level that's just insecurity or whatever, but still it makes them awful, and the fact that those awful people are so handsomely rewarded, and the good people I know, and me, have to struggle so much for so little. It's hopeless. These people never have to worry about the most important things: that's an amount of money that means you'll never have to worry about anything you don't choose to worry about....and they spend their time making a project out of shaming the poor and bragging about themselves.
So that's if he's real and honest...and who really knows about that. But, and this is a big thing, even if this is just a fabrication and none of the financial or logistical implications are real, there is a human on the other end of this, typing these things, posting these pictures with an intent of just making everyone feel poor and hopeless. In a way, that's almost just as bad, the thought that there's just somebody on here so intent on making ski bums feel poor and hopeless. Just making a daily project out of spreading conflict and bad feelings.
Yeah, it's all supposed to be this staredown where the first one who admits any vulnerability is the loser...and that whole world he lives in or his character embodies is a winners-and-losers mentality....I get that. I'm the loser of the who's the biggest "baller" contest. I just don't want it here. I've never had any money, but real skiers weren't supposed to care so much about that. But it matters, you guys shit on some guy here for having a hyundai sonata, which is a way nicer car than my wife's hyundai accent, which is so much nicer than my truck that's now so rusty the bed is just resting against the cab and fluttering around and shaking the whole truck above 40 mph...it's so much nicer that she won't switch with me so I can go try to scratch together some more money driving lyft with it. I had a flat on my 20 year old dryrotted tire the other day and it's getting so fucked up we're putting tubes in it just to hold air for another few months until the next flat because tires are so expensive (for me). I'd love to be able to afford a hyundai sonata so I could drive Lyft on the weekends and start covering some of the medical bills from this winter. It's not just me, not even close. A lot of my coworkers, let alone the clients, think of me as a guy who has it easy money-wise. Some of them are sharing one $500 car for mom, dad, and 3 adult kids all of whom have to get to work, and the whole day and night is just one big insane juggling act. I live in my own home, not in public housing, I'm the guy with money at my job. I own some tools and a smart phone, I'm the guy with money in my world.
The thing is, even around skiing there's always been the owner class, the high end lodging guests, etc....but you leave all that behind because you're skiing in ways they can't ski. You're there for every pow day, there's all those moments you wouldn't trade for any amount of money. That used to sustain me, there should be at least a little of that here...but it's getting eclipsed, at least for me.
I don't even know why this guy is here....is it some skier from Denver who loves pissing everyone off so he made a character to remind ski bums how poor we are? What a sick world if that's it. Is it some used car dealer in Tennessee who can't stop rubbing it in how easy it is for him to make my year's salary in a week? What a sick world that is.
Do I need to just check out of tgr....probably, but wtf. We're handing the powmag forum and "community" over to a handful of total assholes who aren't funny, aren't into our sport(s), aren't really anything except firehoses of negative energy. That whole worldview, be it real or a character, is just toxic. I can't help but wonder what life would be like with that kind of money, let alone coming from a job I didn't hate...but that's toxic thinking as a poor person. And that's what they want...it's this act of psychological hostility. It's "what bike could I get if I had $5000 to throw around" or "I bet that guy doesn't have to walk through mud to get to his front door" or whatever....and it invades everything and it's the opposite of being thankful for what I do have. Even knowing how bad, and unhealthy, and unproductive it is, it's still really hard to control. My work life is spent driving, and I see these guys with the expensive brand new cars who just drive like the most selfish, thoughtless assholes, and I think about this asshole poster on tgr and all the shit, and it sucks. It's a terrible feeling.
We're not supposed to admit to anything bothering us ever, then the troll has some kind of trollgasm and gets to claim victory....on one level I get that, on the other level--this whole thing makes it hard to come here and read and participate without incurring a bunch of really bad vibes, and I think everyone involved ought to take some note of that in the context of trying to understand how this group of people and our forum has changed over the years.
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