work bathrooms = SLAY3D

[neufox47]

I swear our bathroom at work was built to be air tight. Commercial building codes should require a certain number of air changes in bathrooms.

[riser4]

I swear our bathroom at work was built to be air tight. Commercial building codes should require a certain number of air changes in bathrooms.

Hotbox!

[goldengatestinx]

Hotbox!

And those new EPA rules prohibiting venting that noxiousism into the atmosphere.

[booner]

Taking a pretty good run at the record today

[TAFKALVS]

I had 6 scrambled eggs, bacon spam and avocado topped with too much Sriracha for dinner last night. Based on the cramping and gurgling happening in my GI tract, I can already tell that the work bathroom is going to be declared a bio-hazard zone soon.

[riser4]

I had 6 scrambled eggs, bacon spam and avocado topped with too much Sriracha for dinner last night. Based on the cramping and gurgling happening in my GI tract, I can already tell that the work bathroom is going to be declared a bio-hazard zone soon.

Thanks for the warning.

[shroom]

bacon, spam or bacon spam? if the latter, I need to find me some bacon spam musubi.

[stfu&gbtw]

Check... Mussels marinara for dinner last night. Bashar al-Assad would be jealous.

[TAFKALVS]

bacon, spam or bacon spam? if the latter, I need to find me some bacon spam musubi.

Bacon flavored Spam. It's kind of amazing.

Coming to Alpental Sunday?

[detrusor]

First day I met a good friend of mine many years ago.

Group ride waiting to leave the bike shop. He runs in, saying this will just take a minute. Up and bro the shop bath room and proceeds to just Sla3 the place loud terrible sounds, all the while screaming "why does it hurt so bad! Oh god it hurts worse when I pee!" Steps out to 20 strangers, huge smile on his face. Door open, eye watering stench following him. Introduction made.

I thought, I like this guy

[WTF is dat]

I ate a ghost pepper pizza the other day.

It was pretty good, but holy fuck I didn't know it was possible for my asshole to burn as bad as it did on the way out.


That shit seriously hurt

[NW_SKIER]

I ate a ghost pepper pizza the other day.

It was pretty good, but holy fuck I didn't know it was possible for my asshole to burn as bad as it did on the way out.


That shit seriously hurt

Vibes. I've been there, and I don't wish that on anyone

[TAFKALVS]

Vibes. I've been there, and I don't wish that on anyone

The pre-poop sweats/shakes.

[NW_SKIER]

The pre-poop sweats/shakes.

That's one step before the debilitating cramp that locks up your whole body while you pray it goes away without shitting yourself.

[sb]

ramps, just sayin

[goldengatestinx]

Damn it, now I need to read the whole thread all over again...and make my wife wonder why I'm crying laughing.

[BS720]

I work in a rather large health system in administration, one year in. I'm pretty much the only male, working with mostly 50-70 year old crochety ladies. I see a director on a regular basis, and she's the highest female I run into. Share the bathroom with about 10 admin offices. Since I work 2300-0730, I can destroy the bathroom all I want, as long as I leave it clean in the morning. One highmark, everyone knows it "must" have been the male.

One morning, I was waiting to pass on report to my co-worker. I know she's regularly 15 minutes late, so I run up and grab breakfast. As I go in, the line cook is apologizing for being late, stating they are short staffed. Eggs look like someone ran out of time to cook them, but, fuck, I've never gotten sick on eggs. Load the plate up. On second inspection, the eggs are way too watery, but I'm all in and starving. Finish around 0640, around 0655, my stomach is going haywire. Run, RUN, to the bathroom, can barely put down the toilet liner before a Hawaiian volcano erupts all over the toilet. Oh, yeah: no fan. I finish, open the door, and there's the director. I say, good morning! She gives me a shitty look. I say, hey, you may want to find another bathroom. She says, nah, it's fine, I just need to wash my hands. Me, You REALLY may want to find another bathroom. She's halfway in the door when the smell of food poisoning turns her green. Storms out to find another place to wash her hands. What, I should have let her go in??

[shroom]

asserting dominance like you should, nice.

[riser4]

Use your Jedi mind tricks. This is not the bathroom you are lucking for.

[TAFKALVS]

asserting dominance like you should, nice.

Would you say odor or streaking/splattering shows boss status better?

[riser4]

Would you say odor or streaking/splattering shows boss status better?

High mark it!

[TAFKALVS]

High mark it!

Somebody at my work keeps spackling the underside of the toilet seat with shit nuggets. It's kind of amazing, honestly.

[shroom]

if im being serious about it, nothing leaves an impact like an upper-decker

that screams promotion

[TAFKALVS]

if im being serious about it, nothing leaves an impact like an upper-decker

that screams promotion

I just looked that one up... that is so dominate it probably needs a safe word.

[riser4]

Even better than a clean bowl upper decker is a dirty bowl upper decker. Disgusted party flushes the toilet to clear it and is treated to a brown deluge instead of a cleared bowl.