Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

**miket_81** · 02-14-2012, 12:54 PM

Back in College I took a 4 day school trip to Steamboat. On the bus ride there (12hr) this one kid was bragging the whole way there how awesome he was (turned out to be awesome at going fast OOC on greens) Anyway he had a pair of old straight skis that he thought to be the most amazing thing ever.
The skis had one of those gimmicky metal things glued to the topsheet called a power dampener or something...(I know it had the name power in it.. Well one of them had came off.

One day after skiing he had followed me into a ski shop. He walks up to the salesman and explains to him his problem and and how "this ski has lost it's power" and needs the little metal sheet thing replaced and is inquiring if they have them in stock.. These are easily 10 year old skis...

The salesman looks at me like are you kidding me. I do the whole smirk throw up my shoulders thing.. I don't know how we didn't lose it right there..

**time2clmb** · 02-14-2012, 03:40 PM

At 8700' today at Lake Louise. 2 boarders after just giving it on a walking traverse one of them says "wow the air is sure thin up here".

**stuckathuntermtn** · 02-14-2012, 04:45 PM

Mr. Woolly Mammoth is fucking core. That is awesome. I bet he pwns in moguls on old 4Sks or something. Perhaps original Dynamic vr17s. bwahahaha. (I try to be positive)

**zartagen** · 02-14-2012, 05:30 PM

Today I saw a group of guys at the top of 21 at Vail. 4" reported today on top of 5" yesterday and we were traversing above some mellow blues. Vail grooms poppyfields around 10am everyday and the cats were in the middle of grooming it when we were up there. I would have ignored them, but cats were coming up the catwalk, so we were stuck there for a bit. I heard, "This is stupid! Why are they grooming all the good powder?" Now, this a huge bowl with plenty of non-groomed spots to wiggle down at 5 mph, so the grooming shouldn't be an issue. Actually, a soft groomer would be more fun than trying to get your speed up for a half decent pow turn.

Now, I don't think that in itself would be worth posting here. What really got me was on of he guys had 2 chest mount go pros, one in front, one in back. I wish I pulled out my camera, it was hilarious. The one in back was pointed at about a 45* angle down. The guy with them on started whining to his friend to point it up more so he didn't have to lean forward so far to film him, and the friend thought it was the perfect angle.

I didn't stick around to see them ski, I skated off at the first opportunity because 4" is a powder day this year.

**skioride** · 02-14-2012, 05:42 PM

The best thing about Wooly-man are the Rear entry Solomons he's sporting.

**crank54** · 02-14-2012, 05:57 PM

Originally Posted by soups818

He has such a thick wooly sweater on for what looks to be a great spring day. Also, fuck skiing in jeans it's all about the jorts

This is pure gold! Gold, Jerry!

**old goat** · 02-14-2012, 09:04 PM

Originally Posted by soups818

He has such a thick wooly sweater on for what looks to be a great spring day. Also, fuck skiing in jeans it's all about the jorts

What's this-skiers of Walmart?

**stuckathuntermtn** · 02-14-2012, 11:12 PM

Originally Posted by skioride

The best thing about Wooly-man are the Rear entry Solomons he's sporting.

SX91s are more stiffer than you can handle, brobrah.

And apparently the double gopro is too.

That is either the yeti from SkiFree or the monster from Hoth.

**~mikey b** · 02-15-2012, 12:02 AM

there is no snow anywhere in that photo

2 snowcats - check (that's some 'espensive machinery tilling the gravel)
2 people wearing goggles - check
yeti wearing something resembling ski boots - check

snow?
skis?

**Sinecure** · 02-15-2012, 10:37 AM

telemike - that pic was last July 4 at Alpine. There was more snow then than there is now.

**stuckathuntermtn** · 02-15-2012, 11:02 AM

And where/when is that? Is that somewhere in Tahoe now?
And anyone notice the background facepalm?

**old goat** · 02-15-2012, 06:47 PM

Originally Posted by skunkape

Sort of a gaper quote, but I ride at a mountain where there are lots of OLDER skiers. At the top of a run, a group of riders that is made of skiers and snowboarders. The snowboarders in the group start to strap in, while a smarmy acting skier can't wait to say "They need to invent something so you don't have to do this at the top of every run", younger snowboarder snaps back, "They need to invent something so you skiers don't look like complete retards wobbling around the lodge."

In case you haven't noticed there are a lot of us older skiers EVERYWHERE. That's because we're retired and can ski every day while the rest of you assholes have to work.

**MakersTeleMark** · 02-15-2012, 08:15 PM

A NS'er pulled up to me yesterday with a pair of poles that were literally maybe a foot and a half long. I asked him if he stole them from a midget. He said, no, it keeps them from getting hung up in the powder.

WTF?

**Son-of-Pbville** · 02-15-2012, 09:19 PM

i hope that sweater is flame retardant cuz being that core means you smoke in bed. period.

**bptempleton** · 02-15-2012, 09:52 PM

Originally Posted by old goat

In case you haven't noticed there are a lot of us older skiers EVERYWHERE. That's because we're retired and can ski every day while the rest of you assholes have to work.

I'm 24, I ski every day, and my knees work better than yours. Eat it!

**~mikey b** · 02-15-2012, 11:06 PM

I butter my knees. Keeps them supple. I haz the kneez of a 24 year old.

**john_i_am** · 02-16-2012, 03:34 AM

I used to have those SX91 "Equipes" back when I was 14 They were hand me downs from my uncle... Pretty positive I had less problems with those and my Force 9's than I do with my current boots.

**skunkape** · 02-16-2012, 11:43 AM

Originally Posted by old goat

In case you haven't noticed there are a lot of us older skiers EVERYWHERE. That's because we're retired and can ski every day while the rest of you assholes have to work.

Hey, beats hanging at the senior center..... Don't fall and can't get up !

**old goat** · 02-16-2012, 04:44 PM

For you guitar players out there--guy asked me today about my Fender skis. Guy--- IT'S A STICKER!!!. Or I also have Weber and Fulltone skis.

**old goat** · 02-16-2012, 04:49 PM

Originally Posted by bptempleton

I'm 24, I ski every day, and my knees work better than yours. Eat it!

You do realize how badly you just jinxed yourself don't you?

**jonesy** · 02-16-2012, 05:00 PM

**time2clmb** · 02-17-2012, 11:04 PM

^BWAAAAAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA....just when you think this story can't get any better BAM...there it is LMFAO. What a fucking gorbie.

**Son-of-Pbville** · 02-18-2012, 12:14 AM

oh sweet jesus...... this has reached a level i never imagined possible. if that is the same guy ...... i um ....... well ...... uuuummm ...... *phooo* ..... WOW.

I bet he has his boots on too cuz everyone knows there is a break in period and he can't be dropping AK peaks in fresh boots or dental floss hip flexors

**superstator** · 02-18-2012, 12:21 AM

So awesome. I want to meet him. He's like some kind of gaper spirit animal.

**Jethro** · 02-18-2012, 02:39 AM

One would think that some sandbags in the pack would suffice as a similar weight for training purposes. Hell, you could even double your weight and still not have to carry cumbersome skis to work.