Gapergenuity

[Bozoskier]

Goddamn gapers hit me with the bar all the time. I sit waiting for it, and usually catch the bar before it hits me, shove it back skyward, and wait for the people to ask if I am ready yet. When I say no, and start moving, they hit me again. Bastards. Today I had the best gaper thing in a while. I slid in and became the fifth person waiting for the next chair of Six Shooter at Moonlight Basin. The chair came around, and one of the people stayed put. As we were loading, the husband hollers at his wife,"You could have made it, its a six pack!!!!" She yells, "I thought he was cutting in line!!!(he means me)". Wow. You mean to tell me that if there is six slots to load a chairlift, that it fits six people? That is incredible.

-Jake

[Bring On The Snow]

i dont get it why some people are so parinoid about putting the bar down. like how fucking often do u randemly fall off ur couch ur not just gunna slide off (unless extremly intoxicated).

[GoNads]

Since I got a full face earlier this season, I have been hit with the bar upon lowering no less than 3 times. Yetis are so paranoid they're going to fall off before the first tower, and they bring it down so quickly and violently. I've been undoing my buckles before, and been smacked on the back of the head, and almost fell off the chair myself. It's just so... frustrating. At least announce that you're going to lower it, or say heads up. Its like a courtesy tap, haha.

[bklyn]

Today I had the best gaper thing in a while. I slid in and became the fifth person waiting for the next chair of Six Shooter at Moonlight Basin. The chair came around, and one of the people stayed put. As we were loading, the husband hollers at his wife,"You could have made it, its a six pack!!!!" She yells, "I thought he was cutting in line!!!(he means me)". Wow. You mean to tell me that if there is six slots to load a chairlift, that it fits six people? That is incredible.

-Jake

Don't believe her for a minute. Women do this when they're fed up with their husbands and want to get away from them for a few minutes. You presented the perfect opportunity for her escape.

[jonesy]

Some nimrod tried squeezing on a chair that already had a full load. Try sitting on some mow-mows lap instead of the chair. No more Oxygen for that idiot.

[bklyn]

Some nimrod tried squeezing on a chair that already had a full load. Try sitting on some mow-mows lap instead of the chair. No more Oxygen for that idiot.

Reminds me of something.

Picture the Mott Canyon lift at Heavenly, a double. We slide up to get on after the previous chair has cleared in front of us. There is a longer than average for this resort (not high speed or detachable) wait between chairs and a longer than average space to cover between the loading line and the waiting line.

Dumb and dumber slide up 1/2 way behind us before the chair has come to pick us up. Lifty is distracted by the two hot chicks waiting for the chair and does not see dumb and dumber the gaper gramps. Chair whips up, smacks them hard and they fall into the seat. They are unsuccessful at saying anything, getting out of the chairs, or scooping us up as they smack into us a second after we turn to spot the chair.

Ow.

We cursed them out for a month of Sundays at the top.

[nexus]

I have no objections to lowering the bar, but Euros are the worst. They crash it down on your head with out any warning, and the refuse to raise it until well after the sign reminding you to raise, and do so only at the last possible second before unloading, again bashing you in the head.

i just had my forst euro season this year and i couldn't beleive it!

just about every single lift ride some gaper austrian will smash the bar down on my head... my complaint is not that they put the bar down... that's fine, not even that they dont ask... but that when they do they have to SLAM it down as fast as possible the instant they are on the lift! its just such a geek culture, seriously, just relax and wait a few seconds till everyone is ready, then lower it SLOWLY!

i'm 6"5' (that's 195 cm's to you euro's out there) so all i have to do is be the tiniest bit forward and i get smacked.

it does however provide for excellent entertainment holding the bar up for the whole lift ride after they whack you with it, dudes just go mental when you wont let them put the bar down.


and no in 22 years i have never fallen off a lift (by accident )

[brannen]

my first seson there too, it was atrocious. i found it more of an inconsistent thing. sometimes it would be right away, and kamblamo! right to the back of the head. the next ride id be ready for it, and then, no hyperspeed bar slamming, so id relax and take in the scenery. 2 seconds after i stop paying ateention, kablooey, right in the head again. luckily, i wore my helmet more than twice this season, so most blows were taken by my trusty pro-tec. i also wore my pack and shovel a ton this year too, and getting that stuck on the wrong side of the bar blows donkey nuts, almost rips me outta the damn thing. those meltards use the windsheild on the lift if there is any precip or wind as well. what the shit is that?

[iceman]

People are scared of heights in general, if you morons get hit in the head it's your fault, the weekender or one-trip-a-year guy will ALWAYS close the bar and will NEVER think to ask if it's okay. Because they assume everyone wants the bar down.

Find something worthwhile to bitch about you assbaskets, jesus christ you smug bastards piss me the fuck off sometimes. Have some fucking empathy and stay awake, how fucking hard is that?

In this equation the people bitching = the people who suck.

Not that I haven't been bashed and been pissed, but Jesus Christ you spoiled whitebread bastards it's time for a reality check.

[jonesy]

I'm outa here before iceman gets back..........

[iceman]

I'm outa here before iceman gets back..........

Too late. Seriously, this sport needs all the people it can get and a bunch of whiny self-centered lazy clueless motherfuckers ain't helping things.

Embrace the gaper and then clue him in. Then go ski. HOW FUCKING HARD IS THAT?

[iceman]

On the bright side I think I just invented the term "assbaskets", which along with my recent invention of "shitweasel" makes me smarter than the average fucknozzle.

[FREESKIER_FIVE-0]

Do you have some sand in your vagina?

[FREESKIER_FIVE-0]

On the bright side I think I just invented the term "assbaskets", which along with my recent invention of "shitweasel" makes me smarter than the average fucknozzle.

Kudos to you. I believe you are top three in new name inventions.

[iceman]

Do you have some sand in your vagina?

No. It's the sandy-vagina shitheads I have a problem with. You couldn't follow that?

[Toby]

I'm with icemang.

I don't like taking my (bulky) pack off on lifts. As it is I'm usually balanced on the front of the seat. If the lift emergency stops I'm going flying. I like the bar down and I'm always ready for it if someone else does it.

[iceman]

I'm with icemang.

...I like the bar down

Hey now, I didn't say that. I don't care either way. What I was bitching about was spoiled people bitching about people hitting them with the bar.

[Blurred]

I haven't read this whole thread, but has anyone ever had the safety bar slammed down on their head? The next gaper that does that, I'm going to pound them in the throat with a rusty screwdriver. Who's with me? Iceman?

[Toby]

Hey now, I didn't say that. I don't care either way. What I was bitching about was spoiled people bitching about people hitting them with the bar.

Sorry, I should have made it clearer. I agree with the quit the bitching part. Then I went on to my case against their argument. 2 separate ideas in one post - I should've made the distinction clearer.

[Toby]

I haven't read this whole thread, but has anyone ever had the safety bar slammed down on their head?

Yeah, but never badly. OTOH I've done it intentionally one time with another friend and managed to get it behind the third friend's upper back. We then proceeded to use the bar to push him off the chair with about an 8' drop, about 30' after the station in front of tons of people. Holy shit that was funny . I don't think we stopped laughing until the top, then started up again when he finally joined us at the top.

[kidwoo]

People are scared of heights in general, if you morons get hit in the head it's your fault,

So lets see......someone in control of a large metal bar swinging it in the direction of other people without giving any notice or warning that said bar is coming is in the right?

Think really hard about this.

I ride with a pack pretty frequently because I'm leaving ski area boundaries and want skins and such.....rather than put it in my lap, I'll sit cockeyed......and gladly use the bar if there is one. I've NEVER hit anyone in the head with it. Not even when I lived in florida and was nothing more than a 4 trip per year tourist fucking with his boots and bindings and wanted the bar to lean on. It's not that hard to let people know.

It's annoying getting hit with the things because someone is too stupid to project the consequences of their actions. I'm with you on the weird entitlement ski culture thing but come on....


And on topic....no ingenuity but one early season day with almost no runout ramp I let the lift push my legs while I stood and knocked ice off a chair......and got pushed into the pit in front of the loading zone.......on a pow day.......having to split up a group to get in one of the next few chairs. Actually.....that part involved some ingenuity.

[iceman]

Okay, I don't like to get hit in the head either, in fact it pisses me off, I admit it.

Still, enough bitching is enough.

[Pow4Brains]

On the bright side I think I just invented the term "assbaskets", which along with my recent invention of "shitweasel" makes me smarter than the average fucknozzle.

POTD. I hate getting konked in head, but everytime I ski with my wife I understand it's part of riding the lift.

[HukIt AK]

Gapers with powder cords and race skis on groomers, always a winning combination. Maybe they just like the bright colors.

[G]

I hate these spastic bar yankers too. It pisses me off because they get away with it with no consequences for their general lack of intelligence and awareness of their surroundings. People like this shouldn't be allowed to live. They're not just dangerous retards on the lift, they're everywhere. What really gets to me is that these people are also permitted to drive two-ton SUVs on public roads. ... And vote. ...And breed more little retards.


But icey is right, pissing and moaning about something you can't control is weak. Get over it or just go on ahead and open your eyes and wake the fuck up.

I like the safety bar. I'm a faithful bar-user myself. I always lean on it to rest my mangled backbones. But I've never put a bar down without checking first. One day I was riding a hi-speed chair and the drive motor seized, causing the scariest, most abrupt stop I've ever felt. This would have surely sent me on a huge fall had the bar not already been down.

I hate these morons, when I get bonked, I just fucking yell at them. It makes me feel better, and they usually understand, apologize, and learn a lesson. If that doesn't improve my attitude, I point down to the ground and say "hey! WTF is that!" Then quickly raise the bar and smash them in the face.