Sending a big FUCK YOU to PSB.

Does anyone remember the Great Toaster Revolution, when some dude got caught lag-bolting a bunch of old toasters to the outside facade of PSB?
Funny shit.

I have always wanted to bring my own toaster oven, plug it in, and invite anyone to 'toast their own'.

And Tipp, unfortunately, due the the water/altitude/lack of humidity, the 'fresh' (warm) bagels still suck here, and have no 'bark' (crispy-ish exterior)..
The only way to simulate a real bagel is to par-toast it.

Jax was good, but still too baked, and not nearly enough boiled.

Makes sense.

I just want to chime in here by saying that a slightly undercooked (chewy) bagel is nicely improved with toasting.

A bagel with "veggie" cream cheese and tomato. WTF? Real men eat donuts.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by advres

OK, I have a few gripes about Pearl Street Bagels in Jackson.

#1 - it's called a toaster. Learn it, use it, love it. Who the hell WON'T toast a bagel except for these douches?

#2 - Get some employees that care about helping the customer instead of how cool they look with their new lip piercing.

Case in point. I walk into the Jackson shop this morning. the place is packed but no one is in line. 3 people are behind the counter not doing anything and me waiting with my thumb up my ass.

At first I thought maybe they didn't know I was there but sure as shit, one of them looks me right in the eyes turns around and walks into the back room. WTF?

So I finally am being helped and I had a super hard order for the person to remember. Onion bagel, veggie cream cheese and tomato slices. This bubble headed ditz repeated the order, I confirmed and she continued to make my bagel while another made my coffee. I get into the office and find, NO TOMATOS ON MY BAGEL. Since it isn't a normal order you would figure she would remember to put the things on considering I am the only one in line and she repeated my order to me 2 second before making the fucking thing.

I guess I shouldn't expect much from some barely over teenage girl who probably went out to the bar for thirsty thursday, then got fucked in the ass by her boyfriend for valentines day.

It was 9:30AM so maybe she was still a little sore and hungover, bitch

/rant

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I feel your pain, bro. Just the other day I was shopping for some 24k gold plated wheels for my Escalade (the black one, not the tan one) and not only did they not have them in stock, but they said the company who makes them isn't even shipping the next production run until MAY! So I had to settle for the shitty 14k wheels! Then I get home and find out that the douchebags who are installing my new granite hot tub won't be able to do it until LATE NEXT WEEK!!! Then I go to Starbux and they're all outta sprinkles for my half-caff latte!!! Last time I checked I was living in AMERICA, not some shitty third-world country like Italy! JESUS!!

Stay strong, adveres.

God damn Jer? No fucking sprinkles?!? I'd a gone postal on em, Starbuck wankers.

It's bagels you want? You should go on the Main in Montreal boychik.

She probably volcanoed the cream cheese mount too!! Goddanmit I'm really pissed now!!!

montreal has some really fucking good bagels.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by steepconcrete

montreal has some really fucking good strippers.

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That's what I read.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rideit

That's what I read.

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Much filthier in Sherbrooke.
The bagels, that is.

Who puts tomatoes on bagels anyway???

Einstein steamed bagels, what the everloving fuck. Schwag.

Oh well, I have to go 50 miles to get a bagel...and they fucking suck.

shit, three pages about a messed up bagel order?

Sounds like a problem to be taken care of by the hebrew hammer...
http://www.petercoyote.com/hebrew4x.jpg

Oh, fuck...the scene in that movie where he is telling the chick how thier relationship is going to be, in order to turn her on...



Well, that pretty much describes my marriage.

If anyone could find a you tube link...

Quote:

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Originally Posted by axebiker

Who puts tomatoes on bagels anyway???

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Well, those of us who loves us a hot, freshly boiled n' baked everything, with a pile of Lox, capers, Cream Cheese, red onions, and yes, thinly sliced, perfectly ripe tomotoes, cracked black pepper, pinch o' sea salt...well,



That's who.

1. Real bagels are made in two places: NYC and Montreal. So, there are no bagels in Jackson.
2. Bagels are eaten while fresh (a.k.a warm). Within an hour of coming out of the wood-fire oven. So, there is no toasting involved.

You are having a bun.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rideit

Well, those of us who loves us a hot, freshly boiled n' baked everything, with a pile of Lox, capers, Cream Cheese, red onions, and yes, thinly sliced, perfectly ripe tomotoes, cracked black pepper, pinch o' sea salt...well,



That's who.

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:eek: :eek: :eek:

Asiago bagel w/ BACON scallion cream cheese for me, thanks. And DARK coffee.

DARK as a nigerian sunburn goes without saying, JONG.

You ain't from da' yeast coast, are ya?;););)

(The bagel described above is a very, very traditional hebrew-re-brew, if you will...)

Asiago Bagels?

Didn't Mussolini kill a shitload of Jews?



(just sayin', I LOVES me an asiago bagel, but, PLEASE, know yo' history...)

I quit going there years ago.

I remember some wench who hadn't bathed in two weeks got snooty with me over cream cheese or an extra napkin or something...

Who cars about the toasting thing...

Their whole attitude is just rotten.

I really like when they tried to sell the place and nobody would buy, so they closed and remodeled with birds eye maple counters and asked for another million :rolleyes: Still, nobody bought. But their prices went up.

PSB always struck me as the place that you name-drop to show that you're a cool local. and then you go there and see all those pretentious stuck up fucks on both sides of the counter and you realize that only 'locals' go there because it sucks balls.

aleast you can GET a bagel you ask for a bagel here and they try and sell you a fucking baguette.........what even happened to product knowledge???????

PSB=home of the worlds smallest, hardest bagel.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bart T

they don't toast b/c that's what you do to old stale bagels to make them edible.

as for why you get rotten service, dunno what to say. maybe try going to the dentist for a cleaning?

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Toasting carmelizes sugars in the bread. That's why it tastes better, stale or not.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Toadman

You have to go to Queens, NY for a proper bagel anyway.

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Queens? We're not talking about Bangladeshi food...

http://pictopia.com/perl/get_image?p...hoto_id=467764

The Toast of New York.
H & H Bagels

Most of what passes for bagels outside of New York aren't really bagels, but bagel-shaped hard rolls of varying quality and texture, nothing like the real bagels you get in the city.

The "hole truth" is that H & H bagels are the city's best. They are baked to perfection, unmatched by any other bagel store. There are good bagel places throughout New York, leading one to believe that all bagels are created equal, but one visit to to H & H will quickly demolish that theory.

H&H boasts a delightful consistency: dense yet chewy, with a crust that is clearly distinct from the inside yet doesn't offer too much resistance. The crust crackles, not crinkles, when you bite into it, and the flavor offers a delicately balanced dance between sweet and salty with just a kiss of yeasty goodness.

Bagels from H & H will survive an overnight trip from Manhattan and arrive fresh and ready to put into the freezer. Plain or flavored, thawed one at a time and warmed slowly in a toaster-oven, with a schmear, some Nova Scotia salmon, or a little chopped liver and onion, they're as good as they are at the corner of Broadway and 80th Street.
Availability: Please Read Before Ordering: All orders are shipped direct from H&H Bakery, Monday thru Thursday, via NEXT DAY AIR. Your order must be received before 1 PM (NY time) to ship the same day; after 1 PM orders ship the following day. Orders received after 1 PM on Thursday will ship the following Monday. (Perishable orders do not move on weekends).

http://images.google.com/imgres?imgu...%3Den%26sa%3DG

I didn't even know there was such a thing as 'steamed' bagels--sounds like boiling fried chicken.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Tippster

Unfortunately you need the good Bklyn yeasts for a good boiled Bagel, since it has to rise just right before boiling...

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My panties can be shipped overnight. Quality Bklyn yeast!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by trainnvain

She probably volcanoed the cream cheese mount too!! Goddanmit I'm really pissed now!!!

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;)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Dexter Rutecki

Queens? We're not talking about Bangladeshi food...

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True!

I agree w/rideit about lox, but mealy tomatoes ruin it so I don't order it with tomatoes anymore.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by irul&ublo

Toasting carmelizes sugars in the bread. That's why it tastes better, stale or not.

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I knew there was science behind it.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by bklyn

My panties can be shipped overnight. Quality Bklyn yeast!

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Oh snap, some Japanese lurker just creamed himself.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rideit

DARK as a nigerian sunburn goes without saying, JONG.

You ain't from da' yeast coast, are ya?;););)

(The bagel described above is a very, very traditional hebrew-re-brew, if you will...)

Asiago Bagels?

Didn't Mussolini kill a shitload of Jews?



(just sayin', I LOVES me an asiago bagel, but, PLEASE, know yo' history...)

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Sorry man... Midwest Lutheran bagels. I knew you wouldn't understand. Not quite sure where the anti-semitism came into this conversation. :confused:

Actually, that was pretty much pro-semitism.

(Asiago is an Italian cheese, and I wasn't being serious)

OMG, is there anything more annoying than a bagel joint that won't toast?

(Aside from this thread I mean...);)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rideit

Actually, that was pretty much pro-semitism.

(Asiago is an Italian cheese, and I wasn't being serious)

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No worries - I wasn't taking it seriously.

Uh, Montreal?? Lot's of jews there?

Yes, and the bagels are pretty damn good. Sometimes sliced by hotties in the cool bagel shops.