I love my wife and all, but Jesus Hercules Christ...

PB · 07-20-2018, 01:49 PM

Explanation for why socket set solution isn't: YOU'RE LETTING HER TOUCH YOU'RE GODDAM TOOLS!

**The Tortoise** · 07-20-2018, 01:51 PM

Originally Posted by reckless toboggan

My wife just stopped and said, "You weren't even listening, were you?!"

I replied, "That's a pretty weird way to start a conversation."

Ha! I laughed. I will also use that.

**Timberridge** · 07-20-2018, 01:53 PM

Originally Posted by mtngirl79

She's probably doing it on purpose.

El hefe may need to borrow one of birdhunter's shock collars.

**oftpiste** · 07-20-2018, 02:41 PM

Originally Posted by hikesalot

This bugs me. She is not a child. If my husband is all passive aggressive with me i tell him to go fuck himself. Discuss it like an adult ( noting that telling him to go fuck himself is kinda harsh, but what’s with passive aggressiveness?? I can’t take it)

You really want the answer to this? Dunno about everyone else but if I ever said anything about that kind of thing - no matter how kindly - to my STBEW (who was partial to leaving jars, cracker boxes, ziplocks, cabinets, bottles etc. partially open, unlocked or unlatched so that when I'd pick it up it would spill, fall on the floor etc.) I would get the evil eye and told I was too picky or otherwise being unreasonable, and not be spoken to for hours or even days.

Usually wasn't worth the agony to point shit out. Kinda makes you lean toward passivity or passive/aggressive after a while. And it makes you wonder if you actually are being a PITA by pointing it out.

**plugboots** · 07-20-2018, 02:50 PM

Originally Posted by oftpiste

You really want the answer to this? Dunno about everyone else but if I ever said anything about that kind of thing - no matter how kindly - to my STBEW (who was partial to leaving jars, cracker boxes, ziplocks, cabinets, bottles etc. partially open, unlocked or unlatched so that when I'd pick it up it would spill, fall on the floor etc.) I would get the evil eye and told I was too picky or otherwise being unreasonable, and not be spoken to for hours or even days.

Usually wasn't worth the agony to point shit out. Kinda makes you lean toward passivity or passive/aggressive after a while. And it makes you wonder if you actually are being a PITA by pointing it out.

There's a ton of truth in this, but related to your earlier post about kinda missing the goofy shit women do, everybody's different.

My wife ALWAYS leaves a little bit of liquid in her glass. Whether it's wine, coffee, water, whatever. What the fuck is that about?
So for a while, I would just refill her glass progressively with less and less wine, (in this example), trying to find the minimum amount of wine that I could put in her glass, and have her still leave some. I never got to let's say 1 ml, but could have, probably, but she called me on what I was doing before it got to that point.

So we laughed. For some folks, (who divorce, I guess), you just can't laugh about that kinda shit any more.

**hikesalot** · 07-20-2018, 02:52 PM

I'll admit I am direct and prefer my husband to be also. But then again, I'm usually the logical one

(actually I am very left brained, he is very right brained.... go figure)

(ie, I would never leave the tools all over the place, that would drive me nuts. My husband is more likely to do that. ha)

**::: :::** · 07-20-2018, 03:02 PM

Originally Posted by plugboots

My wife ALWAYS leaves a little bit of liquid in her glass. Whether it's wine, coffee, water, whatever. What the fuck is that about?
So for a while, I would just refill her glass progressively with less and less wine, (in this example), trying to find the minimum amount of wine that I could put in her glass, and have her still leave some. I never got to let's say 1 ml, but could have, probably, but she called me on what I was doing before it got to that point.

lol

**Elkhound Odin** · 07-20-2018, 03:09 PM

Originally Posted by iceman

https://www.amazon.com/Satin-Nickel-...n%3A2804873011

https://smile.amazon.com/TOPGREENER-...otion+detector

easier to fix the problems than fix the people.

shredgnar do I have to search irrigation and light timers for you?

I know you mean well, there, Iceman, but that kind of man thinking can be hazardous. If I installed that stuff, there will be a whole lot more complaining coming at me than there is now.

My washer/dryer is in a hallway with a couple folding closet doors that she constantly pinches her fingers when closing. Therefore, she leaves them partly open. It's been 16 years and she still hasn't figured how to keep her fingers out of the way. I've been contemplating replacing with a sliding barn door. I'll either be a hero or dumb-ass.

**mtngirl79** · 07-20-2018, 03:15 PM

My ex fiance of a long long time ago use to leave tools and crap everywhere and I never put it away right or in the right spot and there were always mantrums about it so I got a big, girly basket and just put everything in the basket.

It didn't completely resolve the problem because people who leave their shit everywhere can never find it... but it helped me just walk away and not care.

**Flyoverland Captive** · 07-20-2018, 03:28 PM

My wife drops tools wherever she last used them, every time. It’s like once a screw has been turned, the screwdriver ceases to exist. It’s amazing. I refuse to pick up after her; I gave her an old gummi-stone from my ski kit so she can clean the inevitable rust off the tools she just drops in the garden. She lost the stone.

**oftpiste** · 07-20-2018, 04:09 PM

Those specific acts had nohting to do with the marriage failing other than the fact that over a very long period of time the millions of timed I'd be rejected or gaslighted for speaking my mind or expressing a concern add up. Not the acts themselves but the punishment for bringing them up and eventually giving up on saying anything bothered me or hurt. I tried bringing it up in various rounds of counseling over the years, but that, like everything else, never changed.

I probably would have and could have (however frustratedly) lived with that stuff if all the other craziness hadn't taken place.

Originally Posted by plugboots

There's a ton of truth in this, but related to your earlier post about kinda missing the goofy shit women do, everybody's different.

My wife ALWAYS leaves a little bit of liquid in her glass. Whether it's wine, coffee, water, whatever. What the fuck is that about?
So for a while, I would just refill her glass progressively with less and less wine, (in this example), trying to find the minimum amount of wine that I could put in her glass, and have her still leave some. I never got to let's say 1 ml, but could have, probably, but she called me on what I was doing before it got to that point.

So we laughed. For some folks, (who divorce, I guess), you just can't laugh about that kinda shit any more.

**JongDoe** · 07-20-2018, 04:15 PM

Originally Posted by reckless toboggan

My wife just stopped and said, "You weren't even listening, were you?!"

I replied, "That's a pretty weird way to start a conversation."

Money quote there

PB · 07-20-2018, 06:13 PM

Originally Posted by Elkhound Odin

I know you mean well, there, Iceman, but that kind of man thinking can be hazardous. If I installed that stuff, there will be a whole lot more complaining coming at me than there is now.

My washer/dryer is in a hallway with a couple folding closet doors that she constantly pinches her fingers when closing. Therefore, she leaves them partly open. It's been 16 years and she still hasn't figured how to keep her fingers out of the way. I've been contemplating replacing with a sliding barn door. I'll either be a hero or dumb-ass.

Carefull - sliding barn door-style doors can do a lot of damage too - maybe even more (mashed fingernails, dislocated/broken digits, or if you're really drunk complete removal of a joint or three - and I don't mean cleanly, either).

**flyandski365** · 07-26-2018, 05:35 PM

Our coat closet is never closed all the way. NEVER. Every time I'm near it I close it and I swear it'll be open minutes later for no apparent reason. When asked her response is along the lines of "Huh, that's weird... I always close it".

Serenity now.

**SumJongGuy** · 07-26-2018, 05:38 PM

Originally Posted by flyandski365

Our coat closet is never closed all the way. NEVER. Every time I'm near it I close it and I swear it'll be open minutes later for no apparent reason. When asked her response is along the lines of "Huh, that's weird... I always close it".

Serenity now.

Sprayer is always out of the kitchen sink holster and sitting in the middle of the sink. Makes no difference if there are dishes in the sink or not.. Sprayer is never returned to it's proper storage place..

**oftpiste** · 07-26-2018, 08:11 PM

I think it's interesting how all these men are concerned with things being put back in their place, doors/drawers closed etc. I'm the same way. In the mass culture I feel like it would be more likely that women would be perturbed with men for these offenses and not vice-versa.

**Buster Highmen** · 07-27-2018, 10:43 AM

Exception: the toilet seat.

**muted** · 07-27-2018, 11:32 AM

Organizing things is ADHD obsessive-compulsive behavior, it's your guys mental issue you force on your wives. Give them some slack every once-and-a-while, you'll be much easier to be around.

You ain't wrong by any means, but you ain't easy to live with either. You picked yer messy wives after all, ha. That's your mistake.

**SumJongGuy** · 07-27-2018, 11:37 AM

Originally Posted by Buster Highmen

Exception: the toilet seat.

They should put it back up when they finish using it

**oftpiste** · 07-27-2018, 12:03 PM

Always been a close the lid guy myself.

Living in an organized, relatively clean and neat space is far from ADHD. Far from perfect, but for me there's enough chaos in my life and the world without having to live in the midst of it.

**concretejungle** · 07-27-2018, 12:04 PM

Originally Posted by muted

Organizing things is ADHD obsessive-compulsive behavior, it's your guys mental issue you force on your wives. Give them some slack every once-and-a-while, you'll be much easier to be around.

You ain't wrong by any means, but you ain't easy to live with either. You picked yer messy wives after all, ha. That's your mistake.

And you picked one that undermines you in front of the kids so we've all got a cross to bear.

**Elkhound Odin** · 07-27-2018, 12:31 PM

Originally Posted by Buster Highmen

Exception: the toilet seat.

So here's a switch. Many years ago when first married, she was all over me not putting the lid down. We live in peaceful bathroom harmony as I obliged her request. Recently, for some unknown reason to me, she has been leaving the lids up. Not, that I care either way (fortunately the dog doesn't drink from the toilet). It's a peculiar that she is doing something she was diametrically opposed to.

Anyone else see their long time spouse just change their behavior like this?

**flyandski365** · 07-27-2018, 12:40 PM

Originally Posted by muted

Organizing things is ADHD obsessive-compulsive behavior, it's your guys mental issue you force on your wives. Give them some slack every once-and-a-while, you'll be much easier to be around.

You ain't wrong by any means, but you ain't easy to live with either. You picked yer messy wives after all, ha. That's your mistake.

TBH, if there is a messy one in the relationship it's me. There's just something about a closet that's never closed right by the front door that produces mild annoyance.

In a stroke of unintended genius last night, I was putting some things away in that very coat closet when she came through the front door and smacked right into the open closet door. It remained closed until I left for work this morning, which must be some kind of record.