Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

[spook]

This winning look still alive and well at Whistler. Thuggies, short poles, and gopros. Badass.

jesus you couldn't pay me to dress like that.

[Lamothe]

Caught this gem on the facebook page of my home resort in ontario

Someone had their skis stolen and this was the answer.

If u recorded the pin on the skis u have a better chance of finding them.
They put tracking chips in ur snowboard and skis so if u got caught in a acalanche they can find u.
So what im saying is if u know it thwy can track down ur skiis.

[BigHerm]

So straightlining on snowlerblades is super sketchy. If you're not on edge they wobble. 50 on snowlerblades has got to be terrifying. That guy is a badass.

[shafty85]

Caught this gem on the facebook page of my home resort in ontario

Someone had their skis stolen and this was the answer.

If u recorded the pin on the skis u have a better chance of finding them.
They put tracking chips in ur snowboard and skis so if u got caught in a acalanche they can find u.
So what im saying is if u know it thwy can track down ur skiis.

You didn't know that? Dude - that's all that is necessary to get in to the Dive or the West. Just let patrol know your skis have the chips in them and you're good to go!

[Lamothe]

You didn't know that? Dude - that's all that is necessary to get in to the Dive or the West. Just let patrol know your skis have the chips in them and you're good to go!

many wasted on avygear! damn!

[Shadam]

and I thought we all had a chip in the back of our neck ???

why don't they just use that to find people eh?
coz I'm sure I saw it on some american tv show
so that makes it true eh?

[Captain Awesome]

and I thought we all had a chip in the back of our neck ???

Plenty of people here have a chip on their shoulder.

(ba-dump...ching!)

[BrianH]

So straightlining on snowlerblades is super sketchy. If you're not on edge they wobble. 50 on snowlerblades has got to be terrifying. That guy is a badass.

Either that or he's totally out of control, which is a little nerve wracking if you're downslope.

One from this most recent dump, and not so much a quote:

Guy yells up as I'm riding lift 1 at Taos. "Can you see anybody up there?" (It was pretty empty).

I couldn't and tell him, but we crest a rise and I see some other guy chatting on his cell, so I yell down:

"Hey your buddy's waiting for you, and he seems a little nervous?" (he did).

Then the lift stops, so I get to keep watching.

The chat-bot waves to me and keeps talking. Then he hangs up, and makes another call, and leaves a VM. Then he takes off his skis and walks down the hill, not sure why. Then the lift started and I was gone.

[stuckathuntermtn]

Plenty of people here have a chip on their shoulder.

(ba-dump...ching!)

A chip off the old block, as it were. *rimshot*

[BrianH]

Three days in ICU, some internal injuries, but he'll be fine. That chair has a sissy bar, but I couldn't tell if it was down. He slipped when he tried to bean his pal with a snowball. No word on if he hit him.

[jonesy]

Lessoned learned. Don't fuck around moving machinery.

[plurpimpin]

Forgot to post this a few weeks ago. When the tetons got 50" of snow we kept seeing this guy skiing targhee on snowblades. He kept skiing up to the lifties and exclaiming "it's really hard to not get stuck" then he asked for directions how to get from sac over to DC. After 5 attempts he complained to that their directions of "stay right and follow the signs that say base area" were wrong

[abe froman]

"GO PRO or GO HOME"

[Mr. Multiglisse]

This isn't exactly gaperish but I had to tell the story. Maybe it should be in the Mom Gaper Thread.

Had a surreal experience night skiing last night. It had been Ladies' Day at our local bump, I assumed the event would be over by the time I got there. Oh no. There was a high population of impaired cougars partying hardy and boogying in the lodge, all decked out in 60s theme outfits. Lots of hippies, mods, flower children and, for some reason, disco outfits. The funniest thing was seeing the 12 year old park rats staring in the window trying to figure out what was going on. I, of course, was not staring in the window. Well, maybe looking a bit. What's a happily married guy to do but go skiing?

The best moment was when I was on the upper level deck of the lodge, getting organized to leave. Four very impaired women in costumes and wigs, one looking strangely very hot in a gold lamé skin tight outfit, were on the lower deck smoking a spliff. The DJ was playing Journey's "Don't Stop Believing" and there was a lot of singing along from the ladies.

The four smokers did not seem to be aware of me checking them out or the 13 year old boy standing about 8 feet away from them, gazing through the window, looking a little dazed. Maybe his mom was inside dancing up a storm.

So, just then the chorus comes around and they sing, in drunken stoned harmony, very loudly, a somewhat altered line to the refrain:

Don't stop... believing,
Don't stop... FUCKING MY BUM...

Then they realized that they had an audience.

I stopped in my tracks and watched. The kid looked very awkward and uncomfortable. The stoners tried to act like nothing was wrong. It was very entertaining.

Should have taken pics but that would have been a bit creepy.

[hatchgreenchile]

Overhead on Super Gauge at Mary Jane:

Gaper Girl: I want to do some tree skiing.
Gaper Boy: Yeah, but we've been here an hour. There's isn't any good tree skiing here.
Gaper Girl: OK, let's go back to the Winter Park side.
Gaper Boy: Yeah, how do you think they make all these moguls anyway?

[miket_81]

Overhead on Super Gauge at Mary Jane:

Gaper Girl: I want to do some tree skiing.
Gaper Boy: Yeah, but we've been here an hour. There's isn't any good tree skiing here.
Gaper Girl: OK, let's go back to the Winter Park side.
Gaper Boy: Yeah, how do you think they make all these moguls anyway?

HA!! I ski there a lot and have heard some dumb things but I've never heard "there isn't any good tree skiing here..."

[jonesy]

What el. do Hemlock turn to Aspen? Wait a minute........never mind.

[2002fxsts]

and wet too !!!

I've asked a few kids why they wear cotton and they reply that it is comfortable. ya, right.

[Cocximus]

[Shadam]

yet another of my lame gaper quotes ...

I'M THE LAME-EST GAPER ON THE MTN EH ???

so, our "challanged" friend is riding his sled and its making horrific noises.
he just keeps the throtle open hard whilst tanduming uphill ???
I can hill over to tell him something is wrong.
he starts looking over his sled and gets all pissy saying its missing a rear wheel.
I'm trying to understand his naive-ity and ask,
how many wheels are there on the rear axcel?
he sayz 3 and assumes 1 has fallen off.
errrrr ...
skidoos only have 3 wheels on the rear axcel ...

hmmm, wot else doesnt he know about his sled.

he had SAR called on him in gorman tiwce in 7 dayz.
2nd time he and some clown spent the nite while completely stuck in creeks.
he cant turn around on anything other than flat,
thus will alwayz find the lowest point,
thus a creek.

I'm talking about noodlz on here ...

[DickMerkin]

^^Wait, what??

[Flyoverland Captive]

^^Wait, what??

Shh, I think it's trying to communicate...

[KenJongIll]

Definitely not a Poster child for legalization.

[karpiel]

some stupid macslapper chick posts on ski/snobord thread about if she should ski with a bone bruise. in perfect tgr fashion she is asked for nekkedness and responds with a threat to prosecute two members for such request.
stupid fucking chick then deletes thread as she begins to get pounded.
her gaperness shined when she exclaimed that telebobski was not anonymous on the interwebz and could face serious trouble.
b

Sad I missed the result of that thread.

[sf]

Random dude on the lift asked me if I was worried about getting cancer from wearing a beacon