Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

**stoepstyle** · 03-07-2011, 01:02 AM

I was in the lift ticket office at Stevens Pass getting my rfid pass to work for this hope on the slopes event (24 hour skiing) and this guy comes in and asks "Are you guys affiliated with Snoqualmie? Like will my pass work here?" (completely different resort) and the lady behind the desk says, umm no but I guess I could take 5$ off a ticket for the day for you? And he says "ok" and stands there as she rings him up, and then he just randomly walks away.

**QuikR12** · 03-07-2011, 01:09 AM

"Can you hot wax my snowlerblades?"

Wasn't a gaper, but I walked away laughing my ass off.

**mtngirl79** · 03-07-2011, 01:10 AM

Guy in Avy class... "why do we mostly ski on North facing slopes?" Instructor explains that the snow is often better because they get less sunlight... guy asks "why?" Instructor explains about the earth's axis tilting, etc..

Don't you learn that in elementry school?

**Making a Pizza** · 03-07-2011, 09:26 AM

Originally Posted by mtngirl79

Guy in Avy class... "why do we mostly ski on North facing slopes?" Instructor explains that the snow is often better because they get less sunlight... guy asks "why?" Instructor explains about the earth's excess tilting, etc..

Don't you learn that in elementry school?

Didn't you learn the difference between AXIS and EXCESS in elementary schol?

**mtngirl79** · 03-07-2011, 09:38 AM

Originally Posted by Making a Pizza

Didn't you learn the difference between AXIS and EXCESS in elementary schol?

haha.. yes.. not sure why I typed excess.. I guess i get to share the gaperness on that one...

**MJbumper1121** · 03-07-2011, 09:43 AM

Not really a quote but in a matter of 2 runs at breck yesterday, my fiance was run into by some lady who was out of control on a catwalk, was riding up colorado super chair with some lady who managed to fall off the lift face first into the snow no less than 1 min after loading, and was run into near the "sharp shooter" sign by a snowboarder who managed to take both she and the sign out.

Needless to say, she was introduced to spring break at breck properly.

**jrbd** · 03-07-2011, 09:50 AM

Originally Posted by Wooster

I also saw three separate people manage to lose a ski while in the air on chairlifts.

About a month ago, I was on the chair behind a parent with a little kid (maybe 4 years old). It's not uncommon for new skiers to lose a ski by snagging a tip when the chair swings after loading, but this little guy managed to eject both skis, and to leave them standing vertically right in front of me. So, after loading I found myself heading toward two skis sticking straight up (fortunately, short skis). I managed to reach out and pick up the one that was heading for my crotch before it did any damage; the other one hit the chair between me and my wife. That was a new experience...

**snoqpass** · 03-07-2011, 10:39 AM

Originally Posted by stoepstyle

I was in the lift ticket office at Stevens Pass getting my rfid pass to work for this hope on the slopes event (24 hour skiing) and this guy comes in and asks "Are you guys affiliated with Snoqualmie? Like will my pass work here?" (completely different resort) and the lady behind the desk says, umm no but I guess I could take 5$ off a ticket for the day for you? And he says "ok" and stands there as she rings him up, and then he just randomly walks away.

You can get a sixer of PBR for $5, not a bad move.

The other week there was a problem with a derail sensor on one the lift towers (#8) volly patroller asks where tower 8 is, I might of got written up if I hadn't kept my mouth shut

**astralboy15** · 03-07-2011, 11:01 AM

my good friend in reference to that great day a few weeks ago at targhee when dc went down...you, it was pretty DEEP!

"waist deep powder top to bottom is cool and all....but it just gets boring after one run."

**abe froman** · 03-07-2011, 01:20 PM

Not a quote but...

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**OverTurn** · 03-07-2011, 01:48 PM

Patrollers at the top of Andesite were running a dog drill a couple weekends ago. slide path all stomped out with three holes and three patrollers inside of them. The dog and handler are out doing their thing with several patrollers standing by watching/shoveling when the dog finds someone. Dude skies by and asks a patroller (and as far as I can tell he was serious) "When did this happen?? Do you guys want help searching??"

for reference, the top of andesite is the scree cone visible here:

**XtrPickels** · 03-07-2011, 05:25 PM

Originally Posted by thisisastickup

talking to an older dude at sports den about how my new lifes are sketchy in crud.

me: yeah, they're not fun in crud, they can get super hooky. I'm going to look for another ski for mixed conditions next season.

him: yeah, you should probably try a real company.

yeah brah, surface is a myth.

Yeah brah. I think he was saying that surface skis suck and maybe you were the gaper.

**PulverSchwein** · 03-07-2011, 06:30 PM

not a quote, not worthy of a thread, but I'm sure many of you will enjoy seeing a priviledged little liftline cutting gaper get hers. This was first spin of the year for the Gem Lake chair at Big White, which most of the crowd had been there an hour or more early, only to have these connected cool cats show up 15 mins before go time. Didn't work out so well for them. The resorts resident photo-douche tough guys get schooled too at the end. The crowd was merciless and loved it!

**f2f** · 03-07-2011, 06:52 PM

Originally Posted by SweetCorn

all the gnar guys post over on tgr

i covered this on page 1 of this thread, JONG!

ps: Pulverschwein wins. thread over.

**The SnowShow** · 03-07-2011, 07:53 PM

it never fails to amaze me how many gaper tourists complain about a powder/snowy day while on the lift...you want warmth and sun? take up another sport dummies

**Anospa** · 03-07-2011, 08:42 PM

Non snow related, but holy crap the world does not lack for dumb people. Went out Mtn biking Sunday morning with some friends. One guy just got back from Cancun and had to go to the concierge desk for something. As he walked up, the lady was just getting off the phone with someone who was complaining that it was too windy.

**TurxSki** · 03-07-2011, 08:59 PM

Originally Posted by The SnowShow

...take up another sport dummies

WORD! Add to that the old guy, taking his ski-boots off: "Ahh...best part of the day..."

**paulster2626** · 03-07-2011, 11:58 PM

Originally Posted by TurxSki

WORD! Add to that the old guy, taking his ski-boots off: "Ahh...best part of the day..."

Gotta give this guy a break. The feeling of putting my shoes on after wearing ski boots all day is almost on par with getting head. Old guy prolly can't get a boner, so really, it is the best part of his day.

**caderader** · 03-08-2011, 12:00 AM

suprised this wasn't already on here...

Originally Posted by jamesrdavismd

Which is best for me? I am 170bls, 6ft, 9 skiier, who skiis west.

**skibum_jr** · 03-08-2011, 12:42 AM

Wow, pulvershwein, that's pretty good.

On a side note, I'm not sure if its actually worth waiting for an hour for the Gem to open. They usually open that chair before there is a sufficient base to cover all the shit

**thisisastickup** · 03-08-2011, 03:37 AM

Originally Posted by XtrPickels

Yeah brah. I think he was saying that surface skis suck and maybe you were the gaper.

I got that brah, sorry the skis I own aren't up to your standards. Or is it that they just don't quite go well enough with your arc'teryx suit?

God damn, go cut your head off with the edge of a dull ass park ski you elitist cunt.

Helldawg · 03-08-2011, 07:10 AM

Man, same thing happened when they ran the new single @ MRG. Some older dude and I were # 1 and 2, waiting over an hour and a half, and some "sponsors" walk up last minute. Kinda stings.

Originally Posted by PulverSchwein

not a quote, not worthy of a thread, but I'm sure many of you will enjoy seeing a priviledged little liftline cutting gaper get hers. This was first spin of the year for the Gem Lake chair at Big White, which most of the crowd had been there an hour or more early, only to have these connected cool cats show up 15 mins before go time. Didn't work out so well for them. The resorts resident photo-douche tough guys get schooled too at the end. The crowd was merciless and loved it!

**plurpimpin** · 03-08-2011, 08:14 AM

riding the shuttle from denver out to breckenridge a dude from louisiana looks out the window and goes "holy shit look at all that white stuff"

then the dude from whistler sitting in the back with me turns to the guy and says " yeah that's called snow"

**counterfeitfake** · 03-08-2011, 12:41 PM

Originally Posted by Anospa

Non snow related, but holy crap the world does not lack for dumb people. Went out Mtn biking Sunday morning with some friends. One guy just got back from Cancun and had to go to the concierge desk for something. As he walked up, the lady was just getting off the phone with someone who was complaining that it was too windy.

You were mountain biking in a hotel??

jgb@etree · 03-08-2011, 01:57 PM

Originally Posted by Helldawg

Man, same thing happened when they ran the new single @ MRG. Some older dude and I were # 1 and 2, waiting over an hour and a half, and some "sponsors" walk up last minute. Kinda stings.

You're a douche. You deserved it.

Check your spare.