Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

[F.D.V.]

Better than talking to your dumb ass JONG!

you guys that start arguments and get in fights with "idiot snowboarders" make me ashamed to be a skier.
grow up.

[kidwoo]

Was on the lift at alpine today talking about how good the snow was in estelle. Some guy tells me it's closed because of slides. So I go on about how my dick is so big it gets picked up by recco detectors.....saying I know recco stands for "Retrieval of Exceptionally Colossal Cock Occupancy". The guy goes and tells me to talk to patrol..........no clue whatsoever.

[guroo270]

"Stab you in the forehead?"

Wow, you picked possibly the least threatening place to stab someone. You'd need an axe to do damage there.


Onto the quotes guys... and try to keep enough grammar going so that you don't end up pulling a guroo270.

I apologize. That was a mix of gin, wine, ipa, chron and not being accustomed to my new iPad. I will try to be more proficient in the English language and my pursuit of gaper exposure. Would you like oxford commas added to the previous sentences, fucktard?

[DasBlunt]

Conversation on chairlift this weekend.
Future Popsicle: The snow is awesome over in Estelle.
Me: Patrol just closed it because of slides.
FP: I don't have to worry about that.
Me: Huh?
FP: I have a beacon.
Me: Are you skiing with friends who have them too?
FP: Nah, don't need to. Patrol has the thingy to find me - see, there's the sign in their window - I have the beacon in my pants. (points to RECCO)
Me: You should go into the patrol room and ask them about that thing. (knowing that the biggest dickhead patroller we have is in there at the time)

Another reason why recco sucks.

[DasBlunt]

you guys that start arguments and get in fights with "idiot snowboarders" make me ashamed to be a skier.
grow up.

Glad you said it.

someone ran into me while on skis the other day. I politely told him to watch the person downhill from you when you are merging onto a trail (which was me, down hill and ran into from behind while moving), he said thanks, and profusely said sorry. When I went to lunch, he was * surprise" in the line and bought my big feast of a lunch...classy.

[thin cover]

Heard on a SoVT gondy yesterday:
Race coach (complete with Mountain Creek Ski Team jacket full of spancership patches from various financial planning firms ) to 13 year old girl racer (in full makeup): "You can't ski Mt. Hood in February, the weather's too bad."

I have heard much worse then that on the stratton gondi, like " when are they going to shut that place magic down?"

[XtrPickels]

someone needs to dig up that old picture of the kid with snowlerblades and powdercords splayed out on the snow. anyone know where that pic is? i tried search but no luck

I could sworn it was in the steeze thread, but I didnt see it.

[telesucks]

Better than talking to your dumb ass JONG!

I imagine you are probably something like this really cool dad:

[nomedia="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjuRY4ftCoE"]YouTube - Angry skier dad tries to fight snowboarders[/nomedia]

[farmer]

you guys that start arguments and get in fights with "idiot snowboarders" make me ashamed to be a skier.
grow up.

frankly, I don't give a shit if they are snowboarders, skiers, tele, tobogganers, or douche bags sipping lattes in the lodge. Come that close to knocking over a complete begginer, especially if she is my mom, on a green run where you are clearly able to slide down snow well enough to avoid her, and I'll go get even.

[telesucks]

frankly, I don't give a shit if they are snowboarders, skiers, tele, tobogganers, or douche bags sipping lattes in the lodge. Come that close to knocking over a complete begginer, especially if she is my mom, on a green run where you are clearly able to slide down snow well enough to avoid her, and I'll go get even.

yeah, cut that out.

It's not like people go around trying to take people out on purpose.
If they're out of control yell at them to slow down.
If you're (with) a beginner stay on runs where idiots aren't flying down way too fast.
I'm not saying it's not a problem, I'm just saying that fighting about it only makes it worse.

[Altaholic]

Conversation on chairlift this weekend.
Future Popsicle: The snow is awesome over in Estelle.
Me: Patrol just closed it because of slides.
FP: I don't have to worry about that.
Me: Huh?
FP: I have a beacon.
Me: Are you skiing with friends who have them too?
FP: Nah, don't need to. Patrol has the thingy to find me - see, there's the sign in their window - I have the beacon in my pants. (points to RECCO)
Me: You should go into the patrol room and ask them about that thing. (knowing that the biggest dickhead patroller we have is in there at the time)

Priceless!!!

[legallyillegal]

frankly, I don't give a shit if they are snowboarders, skiers, tele, tobogganers, or douche bags sipping lattes in the lodge. Come that close to knocking over a complete begginer, especially if she is my mom, on a green run where you are clearly able to slide down snow well enough to avoid her, and I'll go get even.

i'll try to remember to stay on your mom's ass next time.

[DoWork]

I have heard much worse then that on the stratton gondi, like " when are they going to shut that place magic down?"

Hahahahahaha ZING!

[bushman]

yeah, cut that out.

If you're (with) a beginner stay on runs where idiots aren't flying down way too fast.

Did you not read where Farmer said "we were on the only green run on the mountain that was open at that time." Read it twice if thats what it takes fer fuck sake.

[Spyplane]

I apologize. That was a mix of gin, wine, ipa, chron and not being accustomed to my new iPad. I will try to be more proficient in the English language and my pursuit of gaper exposure. Would you like oxford commas added to the previous sentences, fucktard?

I'm not the only who pointed out your waste of space post before, so don't get your panties in all in a bunch. I read it with great anticipation only to be let down and confused, sort of like that night with your... oh nevermind.

Continue with the gaper quotes and snowboarder hatin' all because skiers NEVER get to close to beginner snowboarders I'm sure.

[f2f]

because skiers NEVER get to close to beginner snowboarders I'm sure.

i intentionally run over beginner snowboarders because they can't catch me, the flailing jongs!

[halcyon]

yeah, cut that out.

It's not like people go around trying to take people out on purpose.
If they're out of control yell at them to slow down.
If you're (with) a beginner stay on runs where idiots aren't flying down way too fast.
I'm not saying it's not a problem, I'm just saying that fighting about it only makes it worse.

But some people ride (yeah, ski and board) recklessly and need to be put in their place. Should I have have gone and called a patroller to deal with it? I was on a beginner run, just about to pass the big orange SLOW sign. Dude was in perfect control and had no excuse for cutting that close. None whatsoever.

Next time I'll give the guy a big hug so telesucks doesn't think I'm a bad person.

Leave your snowboarder vs skier shit out of this. This is about dangerous and arrogant assholes and their frequent need to cut off beginners. No one ever has to deal with consequences these days and I refuse to kowtow to anyone like you, telesucks, who thinks it has to be that way. I may have gone overboard in what I said, but that guy deserved to have his legs broken.

[halcyon]

Also, this is about gaper quotes. In my OP I said that I was probably the gaper in that situation. If some mag had overheard it, they might have repeated it here.

Let's hug it out and get this thing back on track.

[point it]

I used to work at Sport Chek as a tech and one day some guy came in asking for base lights. This in combination with the thick Asian accent made it really hard for me to figure out what he was talking about. He eventually made it clear that he had seen them on the hill and they were the lights that people mount in the base of their skis to make the snow glow different colours. At this point I barely managed to hold myself back from starting to laugh and explained that It was just the colour of the ski base that reflects off of the snow. He wasn't having any of it and started to get annoyed with me, "no! base lights, I seen them they are real"....etc at a loss as to what to do next I went with my failsafe backup... "Ooooooohh, baselights! yeah now I know what you are talking about, yeah we dont have them here. Try MEC I am pretty sure they stalk them."

Would love to have been there to see him explain that to the guys at MEC

[Johnny Deep]

Stabbing someone in the heart with a pencil would be far more threatening.

[ClarkleberryFinn]

Should ski's be heavier at the front?

I've just bought some K2 Silencers and when I lift my foot the front of the ski drops because it is heavier than the back.

I was expecting them to be fairly evenly balanced, being twin tips...

Do I need to get the bindings remounted further forwards?

Riiight...

[bcd]

In my OP I said that I was probably the gaper in that situation.

That doesn't make you a gaper. It just makes you a fuckin douchebag, Joey. There's a pretty big difference.

[minimal]

I used to work at Sport Chek as a tech and one day some guy came in asking for base lights. This in combination with the thick Asian accent made it really hard for me to figure out what he was talking about. He eventually made it clear that he had seen them on the hill and they were the lights that people mount in the base of their skis to make the snow glow different colours. At this point I barely managed to hold myself back from starting to laugh and explained that It was just the colour of the ski base that reflects off of the snow. He wasn't having any of it and started to get annoyed with me, "no! base lights, I seen them they are real"....etc at a loss as to what to do next I went with my failsafe backup... "Ooooooohh, baselights! yeah now I know what you are talking about, yeah we dont have them here. Try MEC I am pretty sure they stalk them."

Would love to have been there to see him explain that to the guys at MEC

Hate to say it, but you're wrong. Maybe. He might have only seen flouro bases which do seem like they're glowing, but you can actually buy snowboards and skis with LEDs in the base. Glowboardz

[point it]

Hate to say it, but you're wrong. Maybe. He might have only seen flouro bases which do seem like they're glowing, but you can actually buy snowboards and skis with LEDs in the base. Glowboardz

wow i cant believe I just saw that..... definitely just bumped that up to the top of my christmas wish list

[jonesy]

Gota have it. Oh wait I don't board. Stay off that glow board site it's full of malicious scripts.Gallery link and Calendar link.