Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

[carvedog]

Dipstick on a phone just stood in front of a gate to get on the chair. I shoved him through after the second chair passed. He just looked at me and kept talking. BUT he was on the chair.

FKNA awesome.

[Boonshackle]

This weekend is the end of the season in Ontario - Yesterday was glorious, slush and sun all day with temps getting up to 27ºC. A few moments I can remember:

Old lady parked beside us as she suits up: Wow, it sure is nice out
Me: Yup, gonna be a great day
Lady: Shame it's only going to stay good for 20 minutes. We're only going up for one run just to say we did it.
Me: WTF? The snow's only going to get softer all day. Why would you quit after one run?
Lady:"..."

Later, after pounding some beers by the car because the chairlift is broken
Lady: Well, I got lucky and got up their before they closed the chair, they said it might take hours to re-open.
Me: Well, I'm glad I'm drunk now. Time to go hiking!
Lady: I hope you're kidding!

Side-note: Collingwood is full of dickhead yuppies that won't give you a ride up the hill even if you're willing to sit in the bed of their big truck while they run their dentist shuttle.

Later, lunch-time, discussing swapping skis with a friend's brother
Me: I just need to find a tool bench to adjust the bindings.
Him: Isn't that... illegal?
Me:

As two of us are walking back to the car in ski boots, skis on shoulders, two separate groups of people ask, in surprised tones, if we went skiing today. No guys, those ribbons of white on the hill are just decoration for the golf course across the street.

[The SnowShow]

As he should.
People with no situational awareness of anything around them deserve to be run over. But then you lose your mo. Where is BSB?

Carry on.

Sorry, Blue Sky Basin, Vail...this douche was right near where the two catracks converge..one from China Bowl and one from BSB..one of the most crowded spots on the mtn

[skatha]

Amateurs on a cell phone are pathetic. Just like these assholes who can't drive and talk at the same time.

Nobody can talk on a cell phone and drive at the same time, a-hole. I've had a cell phone since they were 3 lbs and came in a bag and I still don't talk and drive.

See ya in my ER sometime-hopefully, you haven't killed someone on your way in.

Gaper!

[pfluffenmeister]

^^^ true that (sans the ER).

i've seen a number of studies that show that when driving, talking on a cell phone is more distracting than being intoxicated.

[Lelandjt]

You're ridiculous. It's possible to talk on the phone while driving or skiing if your concentration remains on what you're doing, rather than the conversation. Can you walk and chew gum? Can you change gears while changing lanes? Gapers.

[Shadam]

Nobody can talk on a cell phone and drive at the same time, a-hole. I've had a cell phone since they were 3 lbs and came in a bag and I still don't talk and drive.

See ya in my ER sometime-hopefully, you haven't killed someone on your way in.

My job is driving interstate prime mover and 2 trailers, 34 wheels, 156,000lb 26m long, 18 gears, 26 swithces, 4 stalks, 4 braking applications, 20+ gauges. etc etc. We all talk and change gears and wot ever at 100kph.

[old goat]

The Dutch have it down--sommuting to work on a bicycle--cell phone in one hand, open umbrella in the other (it rains a lot there).

[DasBlunt]

My job is driving interstate prime mover and 2 trailers, 34 wheels, 156,000lb 26m long, 18 gears, 26 swithces, 4 stalks, 4 braking applications, 20+ gauges. etc etc. We all talk and change gears and wot ever at 100kph.

Its geoff the mover!!!!!

dudes the bomb.

[jonesy]

My job is driving interstate prime mover and 2 trailers, 34 wheels, 156,000lb 26m long, 18 gears, 26 swithces, 4 stalks, 4 braking applications, 20+ gauges. etc etc. We all talk and change gears and wot ever at 100kph.

^Flatlander Pussy.........+90Ton off-road/+30%grades/750HP CAT/36 speeds.

[nateski]

"its gonna be EPIC up here today. we received one inch of snow overnight..."
--snow phone this morning

[carvedog]

Nobody can talk on a cell phone and drive at the same time, a-hole. I've had a cell phone since they were 3 lbs and came in a bag and I still don't talk and drive.

See ya in my ER sometime-hopefully, you haven't killed someone on your way in.

Gaper!

If you're looking for a reason to call someone asshole, you should pick something better than this.

Good thing F16 pilots landing on an aircraft carrier in the dark aren't allowed to speak or they would totally fuck up and crash.

Or police officers - who not only use radios, talk on cell phones and use the onboard computer while driving - should pull over when they need to radio in.

Just because you don't have the capacity of speech and driving simultaneously doesn't mean that all of us don't. I have driven interstate truck, taxis and buses for part time jobs since I was 18. Using radios and now phones nearly all the time while driving. Especially on the bus and taxi, not so much the truck. Last time I had an accident was in 1981 when I backed out of a parking space and a car quickly turned in behind me. Three deer strikes in 30 years of mountain driving but no phones involved in that.

While your forecasts of impending doom are touching if misguided, I suggest you take up dentistry. Dentists are nicer and have a little less holier-than-thouness, plus they seem to like to ski more.

You're ridiculous. It's possible to talk on the phone while driving or skiing if your concentration remains on what you're doing, rather than the conversation. Can you walk and chew gum? Can you change gears while changing lanes? Gapers.

Couldn't agree more. But some people are dumb enough to think that if they don't have the capacity to do something - that no one should.

[AKPogue]

Good thing F16 pilots landing on an aircraft carrier in the dark aren't allowed to speak or they would totally fuck up and crash.

F16's don't land on aircraft carriers!!

[wicked]

Actually, it doesn't matter how many years of driving you have under your belt, or how awesome you think you are at doing two things at the same time. The more difficult the two tasks are, the harder a time you are going to have doing either of them. So driving on a sunny day, with zero traffic on a straight road whilst talking about something of little importance is easy. Driving on a rainy night, on bendy roads with poor visibility while trying to solve difficult tasks on the phone is near impossible. But this could have something to do with the researchers picking our normal people and not you beastly Einstein-cloned truckdrivers. BIG TRUCK! BIG BRAINE!

[_Aaron_]

Well, this thread has gone to shit.

[karpiel]

Today I was hauling ass around the corner of the BSB catwalk

I got mine without even leaving the couch.

[bendtheski]

Well, this thread has gone to shit.

Once again!

This just texted from the cab of my semi hauling nitro on the subject of cell phone use while driving on a thread that's supposed to be reserved for gaper quotes...

[ill-advised strategy]

Nobody can talk on a cell phone and drive at the same time, a-hole.

How about this, smart guy...I'll bet you $1000 and the cell phone bill that I can drive 1000 miles in 24 hours talking on the phone without any incident.

[skew]

Not really a quote, but still say'in something quite funny. Last week at the bird.

[The SnowShow]

Overheard two guys asking each other about what kind of machine makes moguls...the third time this year I've overheard this...how fucking hard is it to understand that they are plastic bumps that are stored away during the summer?!

[Super Bass-o-Matic '76]

A lady points at Ambush (the competition mogul run that is very viewable from the Winter Park base) and asks me "Is that some kind of terrain park?"

[Shadam]

Last nite in the take away joint buddy is hitting on the check out chick (he's clearly a flatlander) asking about Fernie ski hill, asks if it has a ski school(WTF!) then asks if it will be open tomorrow (sunday, and its snowing) but what I can't translate in here is how he would ask a lame question and just as she is trying to dumb down the answer he only lets her say about 4 words before finishing her sentences for her, yet he knows nothing about skiing or Fernie. This went on for far to long then he returns to his HOT girlfreind at his table. Soooo, who the dumb one here, he or me.

[skiATL]

Last nite in the take away joint buddy is hitting on the check out chick (he's clearly a flatlander) asking about Fernie ski hill, asks if it has a ski school(WTF!) then asks if it will be open tomorrow (sunday, and its snowing) but what I can't translate in here is how he would ask a lame question and just as she is trying to dumb down the answer he only lets her say about 4 words before finishing her sentences for her, yet he knows nothing about skiing or Fernie. This went on for far to long then he returns to his HOT girlfreind at his table. Soooo, who the dumb one here, he or me.

you because there is no way to follow that incoherent rambling.

[toast2266]

Either the maggots have stopped paying attention or gapers have ceased to exist, because this thread is now the suck.

[WTF is dat]

not really a quote, but I had my own gaper moment this weekend.

While looking for a spot at wildwood smokehouse at vail, I tripped over a chair. My arms flew out in front of me, and my left hand landed right on some woman's chest. she was PISSED to say the least.