Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

**only temporary** · 12-15-2009, 01:31 AM

Patience is hard when you have not made a turn for a week and it is finally clear. It is a good time to ride a resort.

(be careful)

**KillWW** · 12-15-2009, 08:40 AM

While riding Gents Ridge at Aspen on Sunday, saw a fat, out of shape couple on their snowboards shimmying across the flats because they'd not had enough speed to make it to the lift:

Fat Guy: HONEY MOVE TO YOUR RIGHT AND HIT THAT POW!
(Fat girl scooches her board into the fresh snow on the side of the trail)
Fat Guy: YEAHHHHH HOW ABOUT THAT POW!!! AWESOME HONEY!!
Fat Girl: But I'm not even moving!
Fat Guy: THAT'S POW HONEY! ISN'T THAT SOMETHING?? THIS IS AWESOME!!!!!!

**raymonster** · 12-15-2009, 10:15 AM

Yesterday at CB, heard from about 150'-200' away near the Avalanche, cornpoke looking middle age guy screaming into his cell phone at the top of his lungs.....

"WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!?!"

**montanamike** · 12-15-2009, 10:56 AM

I heard this re: the lenin slide in bs: "How 'come they opened it if it was gonna avalanche?"

**seel25** · 12-17-2009, 12:46 PM

So this girl from cali at the dining hall asked me what I was doing for winter break and I told her I'm going to Squaw. She responds "they dont really have good skiing there, I think you may be better off going to Vail or something."

I just said "If it's good enough for Mcconkey I think it will be more than good enough for me" which not surprisingly, drew a blank stare hahaha

**BushwackerinPA** · 12-17-2009, 12:58 PM

Originally Posted by gunit130

Dude on the lift says to me: "Hey man, do you have change for a nickel?"
Me: "Na man, I don't carry my wallet when I ski."

whats the point off using change for nickel when you respond like this(well unless you told him ya or something afterwards) ....

just sayin there is no reason for anybody on here to come off as elitist to even the lurkers here, the worst that can happen is that they cant keep up and join you for beers later.

**old goat** · 12-17-2009, 01:09 PM

Originally Posted by seel25

So this girl from cali at the dining hall asked me what I was doing for winter break and I told her I'm going to Squaw. She responds "they dont really have good skiing there, I think you may be better off going to Vail or something."

I just said "If it's good enough for Mcconkey I think it will be more than good enough for me" which not surprisingly, drew a blank stare hahaha

Maybe she's trying to tell you something--like what kind of skier she thinks you are.

**Ted Striker** · 12-17-2009, 01:22 PM

Originally Posted by BushwackerinPA

just sayin there is no reason for anybody on here to come off as elitist to even the lurkers here, the worst that can happen is that they cant keep up and join you for beers later.

quoted for truth

**seel25** · 12-17-2009, 02:32 PM

goat, if that were true i wouldn't have posted it here...I know what kind of skier she is and she gets maybe 3 days a year tops maybe a few more if she goes with her family-she was definitely referring to "good skiing" as groomers...also she didn't even know what Squaw was just that there is no good skiing in Tahoe.

I think Squaw is just right for me to push my game...ive been wanting to go there for a while now

**jmf** · 12-17-2009, 03:40 PM

Originally Posted by seel25

goat, if that were true i wouldn't have posted it here...I know what kind of skier she is and she gets maybe 3 days a year tops maybe a few more if she goes with her family-she was definitely referring to "good skiing" as groomers...also she didn't even know what Squaw was just that there is no good skiing in Tahoe.

I think Squaw is just right for me to push my game...ive been wanting to go there for a while now

So you're saying you got gaper-pwned by a chick who skis three days a year? I'd have to agree that Vail sounds like the right place for you.

**Sinecure** · 12-17-2009, 04:32 PM

If she said she was from "Cali" she's from southern california. No one up north ever says that. Same with putting "the" in front of a freeway number. Sounds like they wouldn't want her at Squaw anyway.

**seel25** · 12-17-2009, 05:35 PM

ya she's from LA...Vail is too expensive for me, I'm sure it's fun and pretty much anywhere I get to ski is the right place for me, trust me I'll take Vail over anything in or near NJ (not like there is anything to ski here anyway). The terrain at Squaw was just too enticing for me. I may be a gaper but I'm a college student and I got a great deal for Squaw and it looks like an awesome place, I don't see how I got gaper-pwned she's the one who said tahoe has no good skiing...

**old goat** · 12-17-2009, 05:54 PM

Just teasing, man. Odds are you're ten times the skier I am--everyone else is.

**seel25** · 12-17-2009, 06:07 PM

Nah I'm sure you're a pretty good skier man...I think no matter how good a skier anyone is they are better off on any mountain than not on a mountain if that makes sense, it's all relative, if im sitting on my couch in NJ and someone tells me I'm better off at Vail then fuck yeah! I didnt mind the "better off" bc she clearly was clueless...the "no good skiing in Tahoe" comment was the gaperific statement...I'm sure you being from Truckee agree hahaha...can't wait to get out there, only 16 days!!!

Helldawg · 12-17-2009, 09:28 PM

^^Sensitive little bitch, aintcha???

**Neurodoc** · 12-17-2009, 10:51 PM

Originally Posted by gunit130

Dude on the lift says to me: "Hey man, do you have change for a nickel?"
Me: "Na man, I don't carry my wallet when I ski."

Originally Posted by BushwackerinPA

whats the point off using change for nickel when you respond like this(well unless you told him ya or something afterwards) ....

just sayin there is no reason for anybody on here to come off as elitist to even the lurkers here, the worst that can happen is that they cant keep up and join you for beers later.

Not only elitist, but a total JONG reply. The new standard response to "change for a nickel?" is "Get a life, beater":

[ame="http://www.tetongravity.com/forums/showthread.php?t=150656"]Got change for a nickel? An ALTA TR - Teton Gravity Research Forums[/ame]

**Bullet** · 12-17-2009, 11:24 PM

Originally Posted by seel25

So this girl from cali at the dining hall asked me what I was doing for winter break and I told her I'm going to Squaw. She responds "they dont really have good skiing there, I think you may be better off going to Vail or something."

I think she's telling you that you are a gaper, and gapers belong at Vail. When she stared blankly at you, it was because she realized you were far more gaperish than she had imagined.

**stuckathuntermtn** · 12-17-2009, 11:25 PM

This dude in the bar at Lookout on Monday had a Budlight speaker box that he rigged up with better speakers and an sansa. It was fucking awesome. I think he was in the bar way more than on the slopes because I didn't actually get to see him ride it.

And this chick standing near the side of the trail talking to her friends says this to me: "Don't snake my line." Yeah it was fucking freshies and they were getting thin by the afternoon, but if you're just standing there yakking on the side of the trail you have no right to said "line." (50 feet long?) It's not like when you hike out to a coulier and everyone gets to the top and stops to catch their breath and you only drop in one at a time. Then it's first come first serve. But fuck, it's just the side of the trail, and you're flapping the gums.

[Iceman from Top Gun]so I took it.[/Iceman from Top Gun]

**Edgnar** · 12-17-2009, 11:36 PM

I'm gonna bag on myself here:

2006, April my first trip to Squaw riding KT-22 powder day, something like 36 for the weekend.

Me: where are you guys from?
Other people: california (don't really remember actually), you?
Me aka the gaper: north carolina
Them: uh, do you know know what you are getting into?
Me: yeah its cool, this is like day 93 for me. I'm an instructor in NC.
Them: they have snow in NC?
Me: yeah.
Them: quiet headshaking.

That was one of the steepest things I had ever ridden. But it was awesome!

JONG away. I learned a lot that day. Should have moved to tahoe instead of Breckenridge.

**seel25** · 12-17-2009, 11:47 PM

nah helldawg just being friendly

lol loving how its only people from California ripping on me...ur just gonna have to deal with another gaper on the mountain

im fine with that

**gisforgaper** · 12-17-2009, 11:52 PM

I witnessed a good one today. While waiting for my skis to be mounted and having a little boot fitting done I watched a complete attempted sale transaction go wrong in the worst way.

Older dude, aggressive skier (of course), wants a new pair of boots. Boot fitter does a good job of shell fitting, checking the appropriate last, etc. Boot fitter recommends a Solly boot as the best fit.

Gaper immediately complains and wants to check out the "sweet pair of green technicas on the wall." Boot fitter obliges and puts them on the guy. From the shell fit you can totally tell there is way too much room in the heel/ankle area.

Guy tries them on and is like "they're perfect." Boot fitter says, "but they're loose on your ankle, right?" Gaper says, "oh yeah they're perfect." Boot fitter shakes head in shame.

Get to the purchase decision, and the gaper asks about their return policy and fit guarantee. Boot fitter rightly says, "I can't guarantee the fit on the technica, it's just not right for your foot. But I can guarantee the Solly, as it will fit really well with a few changes." Gaper relies "yeah, but those technicas look really sweet in that green. But if you can't guarantee them, I won't buy."

Long story short, gaper goes to REI or something to buy the sweet green boot that won't fit. I felt so bad for the boot fitter, and so contemptful of the guy I nearly vomited. I hope to see him at kirkwood, where he "only ski[s] chairs 6 & 10", in the lodge with sore feet and a matching green/gold bogner 1 piece.

**Garth Bimble** · 12-18-2009, 12:02 AM

Originally Posted by seel25

So this girl from cali at the dining hall asked me what I was doing for winter break and I told her I'm going to Squaw. She responds "they dont really have good skiing there, I think you may be better off going to Vail or something."

Wake up dipshit...when a chick that skis says "you may be better off going to Vail or something" what she really means is "get me drunk as shit and fuck me in the poopenhausen"...

Women are complex...you need to read between the lines.

**seel25** · 12-18-2009, 12:16 AM

hahaha it wasn't my gf who said that...and girls in this college arent that complex it usually skips straight to the "get me drunk as shit and fuck me in the poopenhausen" part, that is if they aren't drunk already...

Rutgers is called Slutgers for a reason!

**AbsolutStoli** · 12-18-2009, 02:49 AM

HAHA! slutgers. i miss the grease trucks though.

**bendtheski** · 12-18-2009, 04:10 AM

Originally Posted by gisforgaper

I witnessed a good one today. While waiting for my skis to be mounted and having a little boot fitting done I watched a complete attempted sale transaction go wrong in the worst way.

Older dude, aggressive skier (of course), wants a new pair of boots. Boot fitter does a good job of shell fitting, checking the appropriate last, etc. Boot fitter recommends a Solly boot as the best fit.

Gaper immediately complains and wants to check out the "sweet pair of green technicas on the wall." Boot fitter obliges and puts them on the guy. From the shell fit you can totally tell there is way too much room in the heel/ankle area.

Guy tries them on and is like "they're perfect." Boot fitter says, "but they're loose on your ankle, right?" Gaper says, "oh yeah they're perfect." Boot fitter shakes head in shame.

Get to the purchase decision, and the gaper asks about their return policy and fit guarantee. Boot fitter rightly says, "I can't guarantee the fit on the technica, it's just not right for your foot. But I can guarantee the Solly, as it will fit really well with a few changes." Gaper relies "yeah, but those technicas look really sweet in that green. But if you can't guarantee them, I won't buy."

Long story short, gaper goes to REI or something to buy the sweet green boot that won't fit. I felt so bad for the boot fitter, and so contemptful of the guy I nearly vomited. I hope to see him at kirkwood, where he "only ski[s] chairs 6 & 10", in the lodge with sore feet and a matching green/gold bogner 1 piece.

Sucks being a boot fitter! I did it for a few years. You know how a boot is supposed to fit and every one of your reps can back you up on how to shell fit and what foot shape their boots will accomodate and yet there's always some gaper who knows better! Then they get all offended when you try to give them the benefit of your experience and talk them out of making a huge mistake! Kind of makes you appreciate customers with a clue or at least the ones who are willing to concede that someone who makes a living fitting boots might actually know what they're talking about!
Sounds like this boot fitter made the right call. More often than not if you let the gaper walk out with the wrong boot, you'll be seeing them again and they'll blame you for their troubles. Probably better to lose a sale than to have to accept a return on a boot that's been modified beyond repair to accomodate the wrong foot! On the other hand, a lot of gapers get the wrong boot and you never see them again. Either they never use the boots or have just accepted that boots should look good and feel as though they accidentally stepped into watering can while rummaging through the garage!