Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

[oftpiste]

got hit in the head with a bar today.

[skiATL]

not a gaper quote, but a guy on the lift on friday:
[normal lift converation...where you from, where you ski all that bs] then out of nowhere this guy on the lift says:
"You Christian? Do you know Jesus?"

it was just completely random, and I dont exactly want to talk about Jesus when Im skiing.

[jonesy]

[santaclaus]

this chinese guy had all metal twin-tips with chinese graphics, maybe an 80 waist
the guy next to him says 'whoa those are wide!'
chinese guy says 'yea but probably not right for today, just wanted to try them out'
mind you it was a skating rink, but come next years powder he'll be ready to go with his 80mm steel breeze beams.

[Powder Pirate]

Everything that comes out of the mouth of "Tom from Austria"

[eblackwelder]

Spring break...
Guy asks: Is Fall Line a mogul run?
Patroller says: : Yes.
Guy says: Is it the groomed kind?

Some people live for powder. Some for groomed moguls. Who are we to judge?

[mtsprings]

Big Sky this past Saturday, in line for Swiftcurrent:
Start of the day, the line was as long as it gets at Big Sky (not that long). A southern gentleman is polling himself backwards from the front of the line, running into people, over people’s skis and into the barrier fence, basically causing a shit show. Bellows out to his group, “I have to have a ticket”

[Garth Bimble]

not a gaper quote, but a guy on the lift on friday:
[normal lift converation...where you from, where you ski all that bs] then out of nowhere this guy on the lift says:
"You Christian? Do you know Jesus?"

it was just completely random, and I dont exactly want to talk about Jesus when Im skiing.

I got the same shit the other day...guy sitting next to me says out of the blue, "what do you think of the man they call Jesus Christ?" I think to myself..."Oh shit...I'm stuck on a chair with this guy...what do I do now?"

But I took the high road...turned up my Ipod and pretended I didn't hear him...

[pbourdon]

On my recent field trip for my Petrology class we tent camped in a KOA campground (not my choice). Needless to say, our crew were the only ones in tents every other occupied site was taken up by an RV or 5th wheel. One of the chicks in my class over heard this in the women's showers in the morning.

RV camper woman:"oh shoot, I forgot my hair brush......looks like I'm just going to have to rough it."\

Later on in Shenandoah National Park while we were in the middle of a lecture on Metamorphism from our professor, this cross-over vehicle from FLA rolls up and the guy sitting in the passenger seat says, "Holy cow, did you guys see all those deer over there!!!! There must be 4 or 5 of them!!!!!"

I responded in a very sarcastic tone "Really!!! Where!!!"

There were deer everywhere in the park, they were practically tame, it was kinda sad.

My friend said I should've responded with, "What's a Deer?"

[OSECS]

it was just completely random, and I dont exactly want to talk about Jesus when Im skiing.

Well who does ?? You might want to strike a conversation up with him if you huck off the odd unintended cliff face with the boulder strewn landing zone though.

[Ville]

From some muppet on an expat forum in Switzerland...



He was SO EXTREME that wearing a backpack with shovel and probe would have been suicidaly dangerous.



Avy danger was 3, which suprisingly enough also means considerable in Switzerland, not zero avalanche risk except on the nursery slopes.

If you are interested, the full thread can be found at http://tinyurl.com/czkepd

Please resist the temptation to post to that forum. They are very soft and sensitive there and the mods and general community would be very easily upset by the level of diplomacy and gentleness typical of TGR

That guy is definately a winner! Read he's explain for he's actions, some funny shit there.

[Bud Green]

This gaper quote came on a tuesday, not the weekend, but here it is anyway:

Well who does ?? You might want to strike a conversation up with him if you huck off the odd unintended cliff face with the boulder strewn landing zone though.

[OSECS]

This gaper quote came on a tuesday, not the weekend, but here it is anyway:

Um, yeah.... you do get that it was a joke ??

[Downbound Train]

^^^^^^^
Apparently he heard mags were violating "Thou shalt not kill (it)." <---bad joke, I know.


bad joke #2 - As for your Southern Gentleman at Big Sky (prior thread), he wasn't actually a gaper, but a guy who has only skied backcountry for the last 20 years.

Don't sell yourself short.

Two pretty strong efforts if you ask me...

[IskiEC]

On my recent field trip for my Petrology class we tent camped in a KOA campground (not my choice). Needless to say, our crew were the only ones in tents every other occupied site was taken up by an RV or 5th wheel. One of the chicks in my class over heard this in the women's showers in the morning.

RV camper woman:"oh shoot, I forgot my hair brush......looks like I'm just going to have to rough it."\

Later on in Shenandoah National Park while we were in the middle of a lecture on Metamorphism from our professor, this cross-over vehicle from FLA rolls up and the guy sitting in the passenger seat says, "Holy cow, did you guys see all those deer over there!!!! There must be 4 or 5 of them!!!!!"

I responded in a very sarcastic tone "Really!!! Where!!!"

There were deer everywhere in the park, they were practically tame, it was kinda sad.

My friend said I should've responded with, "What's a Deer?"

What do you call a deer with no eyes?




No idea.

[BroGnar]

What do you call a deer with no eyes?




No idea.

what do you call a dear with no eyes and no penis?


No fuckin' idear

[Hugh Conway]

brit snowboarder to snowboarding girlfriend he'd drag offpiste far beyond her (and his) abilities: "Just sideslip the wholething dear, that's what I'm going to do"

[Sinecure]

/\/\ I call that "making boarduroy."

[eblackwelder]

^^^^^^^
Apparently he heard mags were violating "Thou shalt not kill (it)." <---bad joke, I know.

You should be ashamed of yourself. Don't quit your day job to become a stand-up comedian any time soon.

[P!NK_polez_Boi]

"What does afterbang mean"

haha, those fucking gapers.

[mogul5480]

You should be ashamed of yourself. Don't quit your day job to become a stand-up comedian any time soon.

Self-awareness is the first step towards recovery....

[Njord]

This is actually from a couple of years ago when I was living in Europe:

American lady asks me: "Where the Alps built after or before World War II?"


I was soooo shocked at the stupidity of this question, that I still have yet to come up with an appropriately snappy answer...

[oftpiste]

/\/\ I call that "making boarduroy."

That's good. Mind if I use it?

[eblackwelder]

This is actually from a couple of years ago when I was living in Europe:

American lady asks me: "Where the Alps built after or before World War II?"

I was soooo shocked at the stupidity of this question, that I still have yet to come up with an appropriately snappy answer...

<in a Napoleon Dynamite voice> During! Everyone knows that. The allied forces built them to surround the Germans. Gawd!

[Sinecure]

That's good. Mind if I use it?

Go for it. I don't recall who I stole it from.