Wiping ass

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03-27-2008, 12:03 AM
Garrett

Quote:

Originally Posted by A-wreck

That said, I have moved on to baby wipes.
A couple swipes with tp, a baby wipe or 2, then a final wipe, it really makes life quite enjoyable.

You really aren't supposed to flush the things though are you?

I want a washlet.
03-27-2008, 12:37 AM
Gordyman

This is a great thread. I must admit I have only read 3/4 of page 1. I can only laugh so much or I'll hurt myself. Gonna make this thread last.

Yo, Obstruction!
"Only a fool looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart."
"I don't want any damn Fop! I'm a Dapper Dan man!"
"I am gonna R-U-N-N-O-F-T"
03-27-2008, 01:24 AM
Nanuq

I drag my ass across the floor like a dog. Big hit at restaurants, malls, and cocktail parties.
03-27-2008, 07:30 AM
MrZach

Quote:

Originally Posted by A-wreck

I can't believe this thread came back.

You're welcome! ;) Seems to be moving along quite nicely as well.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mtsprings

I was a stander but switched to sitting.

The first day at a summer camp, 8th grade, the bathroom had a line of 5 stools with no barriers. It was a full house, I stood to complete the paper work and was humiliated when there were several comments about me being a stander. I never stood again at camp and have just continued.

I was really scarred……………. but not nearly as bad as the young catholic boys.

Ummm...whoa - I can't believe I started my day with that story. Thanks :D

Quote:

Originally Posted by Garrett

I want a washlet.

^^^ That thing seems pretty cool. I've never had the gumption to shower my bootie in a bidet before, but the washlet would make me think twice. A warm air dryer!? Damn. Serious poopin' luxury there.
03-27-2008, 07:43 AM
DrRy

Holy shit. I totally forgot about this thread.

It still amazes me that people stand.
03-27-2008, 07:46 AM
Lonnie

If I don't stand, how can I observe my handi work without paper on top of it?
03-27-2008, 07:47 AM
DrRy

Good point.
03-27-2008, 09:19 AM
arild

I find squatting, and doing a right hand around my ass the most effective way of wiping ass. It greatly reduces the risk of urinal tract infection, too, as the soiled paper(containing e.coli bacteria) will never ever come close to my penis.

I have a technique for keeping the pecker above thigh level when squatting, and I manage to read Playboard, Fri Flyt and Pondus at the same time as wiping. I utilize a one-hander folding technique for this to remain possible.
03-27-2008, 09:27 AM
Crass3000

Standing evolved more out of evolution than anything. It's alot easier to wipe your ass when your standing/squatting since your cock is not freezing in the cold water below. Obviously the sitters would not need the standing adaption.
03-27-2008, 09:36 AM
Mr. Belvedere

Only 2,460 views and 84 posts from a thread titled "wiping ass"?
I think we can do better than that!
03-27-2008, 09:48 AM
Tuckerman

I tried sitting just now and there is just not enough room for the paper work. The stand/squat is the only way to keep everything clean.
03-27-2008, 10:30 AM
My Pet Powder Goat

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tuckerman

I tried sitting just now and there is just not enough room for the paper work. The stand/squat is the only way to keep everything clean.

what? ...rookie.

U have 2 lean a cheek. haven't u been taking notes?

sometimes my last wipe is on the way up 2 a stand. usually cuz I realize I have read half of a Newsweek and been sitting 4 a half hour
03-27-2008, 11:16 AM
fez

I am REALLY looking forward to getting my cast off so i can go back to some proper right handed ass wiping. the last 6 weeks have sucked!! It's amazing how difficult it is to do a proper job with my left hand.

and i only get a week of freedom until i have shoulder surgery and have to back to left handed wiping again.
03-27-2008, 11:20 AM
Obstruction

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gordyman

This is a great thread. I must admit I have only read 3/4 of page 1. I can only laugh so much or I'll hurt myself. Gonna make this thread last.

Yo, Obstruction!
"Only a fool looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart."
"I don't want any damn Fop! I'm a Dapper Dan man!"
"I am gonna R-U-N-N-O-F-T"

And for the squat to wipe types ...

"How can I lay a hold of them Soggy Bottom Boys?
03-27-2008, 11:45 AM
timvwcom

Quote:

Originally Posted by fez

I am REALLY looking forward to getting my cast off so i can go back to some proper right handed ass wiping. the last 6 weeks have sucked!! It's amazing how difficult it is to do a proper job with my left hand.

and i only get a week of freedom until i have shoulder surgery and have to back to left handed wiping again.

Not to mention, your wanking must be second rate too? :fmicon:
03-27-2008, 12:29 PM
WWCD

I'm a sitter and go between the legs from the front.
03-27-2008, 12:59 PM
2nd mate

stand,lean forward a bit, spread left cheek with left hand and charmain away!
03-27-2008, 01:25 PM
The AD

Wow, I must have missed this one the first time around...

Count me in with the camp that had no idea people stand to wipe their asses before reading this thread. Standing really makes no sense to me.
03-28-2008, 08:36 PM
A-wreck

Quote:

Originally Posted by Garrett

You really aren't supposed to flush the things though are you?

I]

I think it's o.k. to flush baby wipes.

My ancient toilet is about 32 gallons per flush so, everything goes down very smooth. I've been quite suprised at the mountains of tp that have made it down. I'm not sure why I wasted money on a plunger. You could flush small people down my toilet.
03-29-2008, 12:27 AM
iscariot

Quote:

Originally Posted by foxy

stand=better access w/o having to stick yer hand in the john.

The REAL question is: BUNCH OR FOLD?

base ball mitt.
03-29-2008, 09:37 AM
fez

Quote:

Originally Posted by timvwcom

Not to mention, your wanking must be second rate too? :fmicon:

ha, first thing my boss said to me when i told him about my broken wrist and surgery 'It's not your girlfriend hand, is it?'

fortunately im ambidextrous in that area

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