Crazy Steamboat Snowboarder Manifesto

I personally give snowboarders shit everytime I see one, it really sucks though cause sometimes I'm to busy giving shit to actually tele... But i look real cool with my Patagucci and duckbills. I got my pubes dreaded in order to show how soycore I am. Steamboat is definately a place just for tele people. Everyone else should leave and as far as I can see we do an awesome job of getting this vibe out there. I refuse to ride with anyone less cool than me... I think generally everyone here feels that way. We are by far the hardest core meanest tele mountain out there. He should just go away if he can't handle it.

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Originally Posted by glenplake

Ooooohhhhh pick me, pick me!!!! Let's engage in an online battle!!!

Seriously, though. They display nothing but self-righteous behavior with their stupid little holier-than-thou attitude. It's fucking nature and it's meant to be shared. I would think the "tolerant" telemarkers should understand this.

As I said earlier, though, this should've never gotten to the point of having to write anything. If a telemarker pulled that shit with me, I would've pounded his face in right there on the spot. I can't stand that passive-aggressive bullying type shit... this isn't high school. Not to mention that most of these telemarkers are in no position to thug anyone... what with their soy-based diet and girlish upper bodies.

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Another cloistered ignorant hater jong, just what tgr needed. Seriously, you could straighten out a lot of tele-ers. Do you ever share your smack talk with pinners or is it just kind of your private thoughts?

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Originally Posted by respect others

10 things you might not know about the '' Crazy Snowboarder"
1. this crazy snowboarder led 3 dehydrated lost tourists out of the b.c to safety in the dark freeing up the local search rescue tohelp others.
2. this crazy snowboarder has helped at least 10 other lost people back to civilization.
3. this crazy snowboarder has hiked back up a mountainside toretrieve a panicked local homeowners skis he had left behind.
4. this crazy snowboarder has spent more hours than anyone repairing postholes made by others just to keep things running smooth.
5. this crazy snowboarder has nothing but etiquette when it comes to faster traffic on the trails.
6. when encountering others w/o means of efficient backcountry travel this "crazy snowboarder has given up one of his own snowshoes to aid them in their egress.
7. this crazy snowboarders message has no mention ofcausing harm to anyone, only the unaware snowflake.
8. this crazy snowboarder agrees that snowboarders should carry the right equiptment,including snowshoes.
9. all this crazy snowboarder was tring to do was make a few people open their eyes to their own ignorance.
10.this crazy snowboarderthinks some b.c. skiers should'nt just assume that all snwboarders are inexperienced postholers.
maybe next time this/these tele dudes and dudettes will open their eyes before their mouths and see that this crazy snowboarder has the right equiptment and knowledge. because maybe it might be this crazy snowboarder who pulls you out of atreewell ,creek, orsinkhole or digs you out of an avalanche.

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So dude, are you going to post up those secret spots or what?

Perfect venue right here....

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Originally Posted by montanagirl

Manifestos = "crazy" only when actions are followed up with armed bulldozers!

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That was soo awesome

All skiers and all snowboarders just suck. Period. Especially those with the audacity to think they can just walk up someone else's mountain. What pricks!

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Originally Posted by Lonnie

So dude, are you going to post up those secret spots or what?

Perfect venue right here....

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Secret stashes?
Just follow the crusty telemarkers, DUH!

Damn,he repairs post holes even. Thats dedication,homes!

Open letter to the Equalizer/RespectOthers/Uni-Boarder

Your Manifesto mentions "respect" three times. Obviously this is what your manifesto is really about.

Aparently you don't feel you get the respect you deserve so you publish and post your butt-hurt manifesto.

Respect is earned, not demanded.

People are most angry about the things they lack in themselves. What you expect others to do is what you expect out of yourself to do.

If you want respect then you must first show respect to others. It's more than just your altruistic trail maintanance, it's a deeper attitude of listening, and considering your own friends and strangers you might meet.

Your enemies have a message and a lesson for you. Look for it.
your solution does not lie within changing the attitudes of the tele-nazis, but in changing the attitudes within yourself. Good luck.



Now out the powder stashes already!!

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Originally Posted by Pegleg

Jesus, this is silly. Rule 1: don't be a dick. Rule 2: see rule one. Presto, everyone gets along. We're all doing this for fun, right?

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Srsly, Pegleg. Thank you. Posititivity can go a long way.

Is it too late to get in on the handjobs?

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Originally Posted by Meadow Skipper

Another cloistered ignorant hater jong, just what tgr needed. Seriously, you could straighten out a lot of tele-ers. Do you ever share your smack talk with pinners or is it just kind of your private thoughts?

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I don't talk smack to anybody. I'm out there to enjoy myself and have a good time...as I suspect most people are. But that doesn't mean I would tolerate being harrassed by a bunch of overzealous telemarkers.

Like I said before, though, they love their passive aggressive bully tactics. And they're lucky, too, that most people are too timid to physically respond to their childish taunts. The reality is, though, that just like rogue cyclists, these bigot telemarkers would get absolutely creamed in a physical altercation with even an average-sized guy. They continue to run their mouths, though, because they have a group-think, bully mentality.

Telemarkers are scary....

http://anakin_sky.homestead.com/news_ep3_wookie01.jpg

Also, open letter to the "equalizer": Stop being a fucking pussy and just make an example out of one of the telemarkers. Don't cut off your nose... so to speak by giving away your best spots.

Men of this generation have forgotten how to act like men. Leave the irrational, psychobabble warfare to the highschool cheerleaders. Unclip your bindings, walk over, and sock the hemp-shoe-wearning, soy-bean-eating fool right in his kisser. Case closed...no need to make threats like you have are suffering from the ghey.

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Originally Posted by glenplake

Men of this generation have forgotten how to act like men. Leave the irrational, psychobabble warfare to the highschool cheerleaders. Unclip your bindings, walk over, and sock the hemp-shoe-wearning, soy-bean-eating fool right in his kisser.

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I totally agree.


What skiing today really needs is way less stink-eye backcountry disrespect, and way more face-punching.

On to more important things...

Just what the fuck did Chewbacca have in his bandolier, anyhoo?

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Originally Posted by IrieRon

I totally agree.


What skiing today really needs is way less stink-eye backcountry disrespect, and way more face-punching.

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Thread over. Thats comedy gold.

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Originally Posted by rideit

On to more important things...

Just what the fuck did Chewbacca have in his bandolier, anyhoo?

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condoms, man... trojan magnums for his wookie girth.


oh, and check out my new sig... :yourock:

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Originally Posted by rideit

On to more important things...

Just what the fuck did Chewbacca have in his bandolier, anyhoo?

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Fuckin Zippos,man! Chewy's always good for a light

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Originally Posted by TeleHoar

Respect is earned, not demanded.

!!

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Tell this to the tele skiers that had their dogs shit on the blind downhill exit for the groomed snowmobile trails up at the pass.

Love rolling over dogshit at the end of the day.

Tell this to the tele skier that I saw chewing a couple snowshoers a new ass for not staying to the outside of the trail,............. on a groomed hardpack run at a ski area!

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Originally Posted by montanagirl

Manifestos = "crazy" only when actions are followed up with armed bulldozers!

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I think crazy snowboarder is a Routte county guy, not a Grand county guy...

http://msnbcmedia4.msn.com/j/msnbc/C...ed.hmedium.jpg

don't call for close air support yet...

http://www.math.univ-montp2.fr/~moha...lvaweb/A10.jpg

I'd watch out, The Equalizer might fuck you up...
http://www.tvacres.com/images/equalizer_logo.jpg

A little old for a snowboarder though

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Originally Posted by jibij

WTF are "generic" peeps.

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Like these, but not brand name.
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/207/4...67b7ce.jpg?v=0


RespectOthers,

I hear everything you're saying, and it all sounds like you are in the right here, but broadcasting stashes is not the way to go. That is hurting everyone because of the actions of a few.

I usually don't advocate this, but I think the best solution would just be to bust some heads. Someone talks shit to you for no reason, clock em in the face. That at least wouldn't make the actions of a few assholes the whole community's problem.

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Originally Posted by leroy jenkins

RespectOthers,
I usually don't advocate this, but I think the best solution would just be to bust some heads. Someone talks shit to you for no reason, clock em in the face. That at least wouldn't make the actions of a few assholes the whole community's problem.

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Plus, you might wind up in jail, problem solved!

Leroy, I've never met a smarter idiot than you.

That has to be one of the funniest things I have ever seen, I too have been feeling increasing resentment as a snowboarder and agree with him and also agree that runining the stashes is not the way to go. Whoever created that Manifesto is very creative and i think deserves some credit for being so creative!

Respectothers,
Partners in Routt County is in need of male senior partners. There are many kids that need your time. If you have all this time maybe something like this would be a good constructive way to spend your time... If you already do this maybe Lift Up could use your help. You could make sure the next generation has the respect of which you speak. Just a thought.

OK. Although expereinced with other backountry activities, I am a skiing JONG. When it comes to BC skiing etiquette there is a gaping hole in my knowledge. Are the rules of backountry skiing etiquette written somewhere, or are they handed down from generation to generation? I've learned a little from some randonee skiers I know, but they don't seem to show much deference to telemarkers. Maybe they do not know the true rules. I've been lurking on this forum to learn. So far I have learned that people should not walk where telemarkers like to go, even if the land is public. I've learned that the best response to harrasment may be to beat the crap out of the offending party. There must be more...please help. I'd like to learn all the rules, and an explanation of why the rule exists would be even better.

For example: yesterday I took a nice long ride, skinning up the ridge behind my house and coming back down. Early on I came to a place where a snowmobile had been on the trail. I skied in the snowmo track. Later I found where a cross country skier had herring-boned up some hills and cut things up. At various other times I saw places where a snowshoer had been, and even a person in plain boots. I came across the trail of a moose who had broken trail up to where I wanted to go. He was post holing but I skied in his tracks. I brought my dog and she post holed too. She laid a steamer in the trail, but I kicked it off the trail and buried it. How many violations were committed by the various parties?

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Originally Posted by I. Torres-Balzhoff

OK. Although expereinced with other backountry activities, I am a skiing JONG. When it comes to BC skiing etiquette there is a gaping hole in my knowledge. Are the rules of backountry skiing etiquette written somewhere, or are they handed down from generation to generation? I've learned a little from some randonee skiers I know, but they don't seem to show much deference to telemarkers. Maybe they do not know the true rules. I've been lurking on this forum to learn. So far I have learned that people should not walk where telemarkers like to go, even if the land is public. I've learned that the best response to harrasment may be to beat the crap out of the offending party. There must be more...please help. I'd like to learn all the rules, and an explanation of why the rule exists would be even better.

For example: yesterday I took a nice long ride, skinning up the ridge behind my house and coming back down. Early on I came to a place where a snowmobile had been on the trail. I skied in the snowmo track. Later I found where a cross country skier had herring-boned up some hills and cut things up. At various other times I saw places where a snowshoer had been, and even a person in plain boots. I came across the trail of a moose who had broken trail up to where I wanted to go. He was post holing but I skied in his tracks. I brought my dog and she post holed too. She laid a steamer in the trail, but I kicked it off the trail and buried it. How many violations were committed by the various parties?

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wow dude, you are a candidate for some serious face punching. Also the moose is begging to be face punched for his impolite actions. I personally almost never ski BC anymore because of all the face punching. It takes up all my time back there. I can barley skin up the mountain in a reasonable amount of time because of all the punches to various faces that I have to hand out. Just the other day a mountain lion wouldn't let me pass him on the way up, guess what? face punch. Then when I got to the top there was some congregation of crunchy tele-nazis having a rally and eating soybeans. By the time I got done handing out face-punches it was getting dark, day = ruined.

CS please out your stashes! I'm gonna be at the Boat this weekend and I'm itching to begin the face punching!!

God I wish that skiing article about this place hadn't of been printed.

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Originally Posted by Thrill Hammer

wow dude, you are a candidate for some serious face punching. Also the moose is begging to be face punched for his impolite actions. I personally almost never ski BC anymore because of all the face punching. It takes up all my time back there. I can barley skin up the mountain in a reasonable amount of time because of all the punches to various faces that I have to hand out. Just the other day a mountain lion wouldn't let me pass him on the way up, guess what? face punch. Then when I got to the top there was some congregation of crunchy tele-nazis having a rally and eating soybeans. By the time I got done handing out face-punches it was getting dark, day = ruined.

CS please out your stashes! I'm gonna be at the Boat this weekend and I'm itching to begin the face punching!!

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Face punching is fun, receiving and giving :biggrin:

There was another article, in a non skiing magazine, about how many people have left corporate America and moved to the mountains, to live "the life" and telecommute to work. The example they gave was steamboat. I wonder if this guy’s "16 years" at steamboat is actually 14 years of vacations from Houston and 2 seasons of living in Steamboat.

Or maybe O'bernhard-franz has escaped the nut house in Austria and settled in Steamboat.

Crazy read...

All I have to add is I am super glad I live where I live. It may not snow a shit tonne but we share our wide open spaces quite well, most likely cause there just isn't that many users.
Commence the face punching...

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Originally Posted by jetski

Crazy read...

All I have to add is I am super glad I live where I live. It may not snow a shit tonne but we share our wide open spaces quite well, most likely cause there just isn't that many users.
Commence the face punching...

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I'm sure you have some exceptions also... I can tell you I have never ran into this issue around here, even when I'm hitting the actual Stashes that have nothing to do with the mountain. (plus I've been with snowboarders:eek::eek::eek:) This is a pretty good place to live. This guy just has his panties in a bunch and forgot his meds...

MEN,

I JUST RETURNED FROM SEA KAYAKING THE NORWEGIAN COAST IN A HOLLOWED OUT NARWHAL TO FIND THIS SAD TRAIN WRECK OF POSTHOLING AND FACEPUNCHING. TWO RULES I HAVE:

1. A MANIFESTO MUST BE WRITTEN BY A MAN. THIS IS WHY IT IS CALLED A MAN-IFESTO. OTHERWISE IT SHOULD BE CALLED A "RECIPE."

2. TELEMARKERS AND SNOWBOARDERS ARE A-OK BECAUSE THEY LEAVE THE MAN FUN TO THE MEN!

THE LAST EXTREME SKIER,

BURT BRONSON

^^^GOLD!

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Originally Posted by BURT BRONSON

MEN,

I JUST RETURNED FROM SEA KAYAKING THE NORWEGIAN COAST IN A HOLLOWED OUT NARWHAL TO FIND THIS SAD TRAIN WRECK OF POSTHOLING AND FACEPUNCHING. TWO RULES I HAVE:

1. A MANIFESTO MUST BE WRITTEN BY A MAN. THIS IS WHY IT IS CALLED A MAN-IFESTO. OTHERWISE IT SHOULD BE CALLED A "RECIPE."

2. TELEMARKERS AND SNOWBOARDERS ARE A-OK BECAUSE THEY LEAVE THE MAN FUN TO THE MEN!

THE LAST EXTREME SKIER,

BURT BRONSON

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:yourock:

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Originally Posted by CommanderBaker

Face punching is fun, receiving and giving :biggrin:

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The offer still stands, Commander. Time to step up.

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Originally Posted by TeleHoar

Your Manifesto mentions "respect" three times. Obviously this is what your manifesto is really about.

Aparently you don't feel you get the respect you deserve so you publish and post your butt-hurt manifesto.

Respect is earned, not demanded.

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that's what he's doing, he's using the power of his knowledge to get people to be civil with one another. I'd like to imagine that once the ice is broken everyone will get along and this will be something they can laugh about later.

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Originally Posted by rideit

On to more important things...

Just what the fuck did Chewbacca have in his bandolier, anyhoo?

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AA batteries

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Originally Posted by This End Up

Or maybe O'bernhard-franz has escaped the nut house in Austria and settled in Steamboat.

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Nope, he already tried that but didn't last too long away from his sweet, sweet lambs.

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Originally Posted by respect others

10 things you might not know about the '' Crazy Snowboarder"
3. this crazy snowboarder has hiked back up a mountainside toretrieve a panicked local homeowners skis he had left behind.

6. when encountering others w/o means of efficient backcountry travel this "crazy snowboarder has given up one of his own snowshoes to aid them in their egress.

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=>3. why did the local homeowner ascend a mountain just to leave his skis there? Did he carry his skins back down in his back pack? What about his poles?

=>6. That leaves two people with one snowshoe each. Did they fucking hop up the trail or what?

Next time I see someone bootpacking a track I'll offer them my splitboard. And they can piggyback me. That works.

oh yeah, he carried nude pics of Yoda and some lube.