A man walking past the Olympic stadium carrying a long case is stopped by a guard.
"Are you a pole vaulter?" the guard asks
The man replies "No, I'm German actually; but how did you know my name was Walter?"
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A man walking past the Olympic stadium carrying a long case is stopped by a guard.
"Are you a pole vaulter?" the guard asks
The man replies "No, I'm German actually; but how did you know my name was Walter?"
My dawg has no noes.
How duz he smell?
Awful.
What do you call a deer without eyes?
No I-deer.
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
I can't jelly my cock in your ass
If Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are on a boat and it sinks, who survives?
America.
Just kidding. It's Hillary- Bill says she never goes down.
Remember the ads in 2008 about whether you'd want Hillary or Barry when the phone in the White House rings at 3AM?
Hillary: " Bill, where the fuck are you?"
How did the boy scouts describe their camping trip?
In-tents.
I actually laughed at That.Quote:
Originally Posted by Buster Highmen
What's Forrest gumps password? 1forrest1
My friend has a trophy wife, but apparently it wasn't first place.
A chicken and an egg just had great sex, and the egg takes a pull from his cigarette and says, "well, I guess we solved that question".
Bob Weir used that joke in a Dead show decades ago.Quote:
Originally Posted by scottyb
What is fifty feet long and has two teeth? The funnel cake line at the Arkansas State Fair.
Two silkworms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
I bought my shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.
http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/...angerfield.jpgQuote:
Originally Posted by Mudfoot
Actually, it's Stephen Wright and not Rodney.
What's black and white and red and can't turn around in an elevator?
A nun with a javelin through her head.
What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One is really heavy . , . and the other is a little lighter!
I had no idea. It just sounded like Rodney when I read it and laughed. I can see Stephen Wright too now.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mudfoot
for the ancient ones here, it could be a Henny Youngman jokeQuote:
Originally Posted by BmillsSkier
Take my wife, please!
I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport.Quote:
Originally Posted by Danno
Did you hear about the dyslexic that walked into a bra?
Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshipper who sold his soul to Santa?Quote:
Originally Posted by InspectorGadget
that one is Henny YoungmanQuote:
Originally Posted by Mudfoot
Never believe anything an Atom says....
They make up everything.
This is the best thread on TGR
A repete
Whats the difference between a tele chick and a hockey team?
The hockey team takes a shower after 3 periods.