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Parking in downtown Seattle for the Mariners game yesterday my wife just leaves her purse/bag thing on the passenger seat. I told her to put in the center console so it’s out of sight.
So she says to me “why, I already took my wallet out”
Women, can’t live with’em……grab me a beer.
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I got one really cheap from a buddy. That fucker was heavy. Had great sound. "Flat" screen. Heh. Got rid of it in 2015 and miss one cool feature. It was great for nerf guns. You could probably throw a brick at it and not damage the glass. The modern TVs don't like being shot with nerf darts.Quote:
Originally Posted by ironhippy
Nice. Make her get the broken window fixed and clean out the homeless person's feces.Quote:
Originally Posted by AK47bp
Attachment 495228Quote:
Originally Posted by AK47bp
I believe my response was; “you think the fentheads have X-ray vision and will know your wallet isn’t in there!?!?”Quote:
Originally Posted by riser4
Tense walk to the stadium.
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Connecting in Copenhage, huge passport control line filling the maze and a hundred feet past it. My wife decides to try to buy legos for the grandkids when we first get into the terminal. She arrives at passport control just as I'm the first in line, waiting to be called. She passes the whole line, goes into the crew/diplomat maze which is empty, ducks a couple of ropes and joins me at the booth where the officer is happy to process her with me. Nobody says boo. It is challenging to be married with someone with that kind of chutzpah.
So much balls. Does your wife identify as male? NttawwtQuote:
Originally Posted by old goat
Dude, that's awesome. I can imagine it can be a double edged sword though.Quote:
Originally Posted by old goat
The problem is that her problems become my problem to fix. And if i dont fix it, then its our shared bank account that gets charged for someone else to fix the problems. And i contribute the lions share to that account.Quote:
Originally Posted by riser4
There really isnt any way to "let them learn the hard way" without me also having to "learn the hard way" even though i learned that lesson years ago and dont make that mistake anymore. Its infuriating. Sometimes i really wish that i could be the cliche dumb slob/mess of a husband who has their wife cleaning up after them constantly.
Women can do things like that with no repercussions. Kinda like taking a piss in the mens room because the women's line is too long. Guys don't mind but try doing that in the women's room.Quote:
Originally Posted by old goat
What Halliday says. No man would do that, and if he did he would get his ass kicked.Quote:
Originally Posted by riser4
Double edged sword with no handle. Try holding on to that.Quote:
Originally Posted by dan_pdx
Right, so that's the paradox. Because it takes balls to pull off a move like that. Or, if it's not balls, then the answer simultaneously more amusing and terrifying at the same time.Quote:
Originally Posted by old goat
It's not balls, they're wimpy and fragile. A pussy on the other hand can take a pounding and still want more.
Sounds exactly like something my mom would have done. Fearless. I grew up in a perma-cringe though.Quote:
Originally Posted by old goat
This is almost word for word Tina Fey’s stand up routine.Quote:
Originally Posted by Beaver
User name checks out!Quote:
Originally Posted by Beaver
Betty White said it first.Quote:
Originally Posted by plugboots
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Of course.Quote:
Originally Posted by Harry
My wife says about women: "Our balls are in our brains, your brains are in your balls". I think she sees through the bullshit quite well.Quote:
Originally Posted by riser4
There's 8 fucking billion of us, so I guess god planned it that way for a reason.
8 fucking billion ..... balls? brains? lbs of pussy???? lbs of bullshit?
.... bated breath.
Sorry, "us" not "it".Quote:
Originally Posted by PB
Related, but not, I member in 2000, end of the semester, I had a 3 week trip (not) planned to Argie. I left the hill in Boulder at 4 am. I ended up bumping into this super drunk chick who I felt I needed to get to a safe home. We, me being we carrying her on my shoulder, around the hill for an hour. I finally pulled out her purse and found her addy. We had walked by it 3x. I dropped her at the door, knocked and woke the whole house up.
I set a flip phone alarm for my international flight. Missed that alarm. The only connection I knew what the hippy limo. Called them at 6 am, dread boy picks me up, I give him $200 and say I need to be at DIA in 1/2 hour. He does mach loonie. I ran ran ran. Just had a little alpine attack approach pack, still probably drunk. Pulled a full 1980's slide through the side of the security maze under much screaming protest, made my flight and slept for 14 hours. Showed up in Argie and was like, now what do I do for 3 weeks. That was a great trip. Not possible post 911. My best slide ever.
8 billion pounds of pussy. NiceQuote:
Originally Posted by PB
Maybe tits in the world? Math checks out.Quote:
Originally Posted by PB
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