I love my wife and all, but Jesus Hercules Christ...

And the bike seats aren't even heated.

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Originally Posted by MontuckyFried

Little basket of clean, small towels. Another basket (with a lid) for the used ones. Have this setup in both bathrooms. I have a custom cycle on my washing machine for when it's time to launder everything. Come on, guys. This ain't rocket surgery!

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Its suprising how many people have made it to be adults butt could not figure this out

A 10 pack of those micro fibre small hand washclothes is ideal, launder/ soak on a super hot cycle

Sounds kinda disgusting to me but if Uranus is happy that is what matters.

It’s all fun and games until you’re picking corn out of your washer’s filter.


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Originally Posted by nickwm21

My “high end” Bidet seat with heated water, heated seat, adjustable pressure, heated blow dry was $350. People in this thread spend 20x that on bikes that get less seat time….


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One thing that the high end ones require is power and/or hot water. The cheap ones are a five minute install.

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Originally Posted by nickwm21

My “high end” Bidet seat with heated water, heated seat, adjustable pressure, heated blow dry was $350. People in this thread spend 20x that on bikes that get less seat time….


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Originally Posted by Supermoon

One thing that the high end ones require is power and/or hot water. The cheap ones are a five minute install.

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and cost under $30.

I have zero "construction" skills and installed a bidet on my own. The high end ones would have required I get some help. Also, I'm a renter so I was not about to spend that kind of coin on an upgrade to this house, even if it is an order of magnitude cheaper than my mt bike. But I will leave the budget bidet when I leave. :D

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Originally Posted by Supermoon

One thing that the high end ones require is power and/or hot water. The cheap ones are a five minute install.

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Yeah, I’ve been wondering about the power for the heated ones. No outlets near my crappers, and retro-fit hard wiring…nope, not gonna try that.

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Originally Posted by Diamond Joe

Having never used a bidet, the question that comes to mind for me is, how do you then DRY said butthole after the event? Air dry? TP?

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My water is warm. A couple of seconds of drip dry here. Never even dab and it's not like Uranus traps a lot of water.... The blow dryer doesn't really do much.

Best $250 I ever spent, trouble free for 6 years.

For the cheap bolt-on one's, wouldn't the water be pretty cold, or does it have a reservoir were it can warm to room temp?

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Originally Posted by Thaleia

For the cheap bolt-on one's, wouldn't the water be pretty cold, or does it have a reservoir were it can warm to room temp?

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It’s the same as the cold water from your tap

When is the last time you heard of somebody running over their own dog in their own driveway when they came home from work?

Never. It never happens.

Just drive into the goddamned garage. They’ll get out of the way.

Cold water is refreshing. And soothing if you're feeling the aftermath of something you ate that was too spicy.

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Originally Posted by Mustonen

When is the last time you heard of somebody running over their own dog in their own driveway when they came home from work?

Never. It never happens.

Just drive into the goddamned garage. They’ll get out of the way.

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One of my friends had an 8 m/o puppy run over by someone with the same thought. Gruesome.

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Originally Posted by ghosthop

One of my friends had an 8 m/o puppy run over by someone with the same thought. Gruesome.

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Caveat: puppies and old dogs. If I’m creeping along at 5mph the dog is not going to just stand there.

best three billz I ever did spend:

https://bidetking.com/products/alpha...et-toilet-seat


edit, since this is the thread for splurgin on wives :fm: ... ladies like the "front feminine wash" for pre/post coitus etc.

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Originally Posted by Norseman

best three billz I ever did spend:

https://bidetking.com/products/alpha...et-toilet-seat


edit, since this is the thread for splurgin on wives :fm: ... ladies like the "front feminine wash" for pre/post coitus etc.

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Then why don't they call it the Bidet Queen. (And it looks exactly like the HD model and the Brondell model I mentioned. I'm getting the idea that all the bidet seats except Toto come from the same factory in Korea.)

Now $299. https://www.brondell.com/swash-se400...RoCxyoQAvD_BwE

Chicks do indeed dig 'em. Truly a life changer along with the cordless vacuum. Which I suppose you could use to suck the few drops of water of your ass if it actually bothered you.

There are definitely some aftermarket attachment bidets that will heat up the water. But if it’s cold just go for it - think of it like a wim hof session for your asshole.

I have cold water, it's not a problem. My butthole can take it.

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Originally Posted by Danno

My butthole can take it.

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Now there’s a sig for someone.

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Originally Posted by ötzi

Now there’s a sig for someone.

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Jer?

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Originally Posted by Mustonen

Caveat: puppies and old dogs. If I’m creeping along at 5mph the dog is not going to just stand there.

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Buddy of mine did this to his dog. Not a puppy or senile either.... I guess just a dumb fuck dog. Bro was crushed, it was really sad.

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Originally Posted by dannynoonan

Buddy of mine did this to his dog. Not a puppy or senile either.... I guess just a dumb fuck dog. Bro was crushed, it was really sad.

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Did he run over his goat and horse next?

I don't know why anybody would assume a dog is going to be smart enough to get out of the way of a car. Some are, but lots aren't.

Well. Fine. I guess I’m not speaking generally, or I shouldn’t.

My dogs get out of the way when they’re milling around when you get home. I drive less than 5mph.

But horror stories and tragedies abound.