Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

**abraham** · 01-29-2015, 04:49 PM

I might have just pushed him off the ramp.

A year ago I was on one if those ramps and looked down at I5 south to see that a semi had jackknifed, flipped on it's side and wedged itself so there was no space for a car to pass by it. I think a person could walk past.

I also just saw someone pull into a parking spot, get out and smoke a cig. Then he got back in and pulled forward over the planted divider with one axle. He was completely unfazed until something scraped louder than the other scraped. That got him to stop for 5 seconds, look around, make eye contact with me and pull forward over the divider like it was no big deal. Strange. And not Asian.

**core2** · 01-29-2015, 06:45 PM

If I ever die skiing it will be while driving to or from the mountain, probably hit by an Asian guy.

**raueda1** · 01-29-2015, 09:34 PM

So I get hooked up with a weird guy on a sidecountry trip behind Stowe (don't ask). The return was through their nordic area, miles of perfectly groomed skate trails and XC tracks. Coming out it's slightly downhill, so it's easy to skate & pole out except for a couple small bumps that you need to herringbone or aggressively skate up.

So, I'm well ahead of this guy, who turned out to be pitifully out of shape, and turn around to see what he's doing. To my amazement he's carrying his skis up a little 10ft incline and postholing up in the XC track. I yell at him to get the hell out of the track. He yells back at me that he doesn't give a shit. Not 3 seconds later some badass 70 year old woman comes blasting by and shouts at him to "Young man, get out of that track immediately!!! They work very hard to make it and you're ruining it for everyone!" So then the guys screams FUUUUUCKKKK!!! at the top of his lungs, literally throws his skis into the woods and starts beating them with his poles. Complete meltdown tantrum. I've never seen anything like it before or since. I headed back the car and haven't seen him since.

**TahoeJ** · 01-29-2015, 10:08 PM

^^ Haha. The meltdown tantrum is always amazing to watch. I played in a golf tournament against a guy who hit three balls out of bounds on the second hole, then grabbed his bag / clubs and tossed them over a nearby fence into a stream and stormed off.

**Aus George** · 01-30-2015, 03:56 AM

^^ Skiing street = Meldown.

**skiitsbetter** · 01-30-2015, 07:51 AM

"which way should I go?"
"uhh, the easiest way down is over there"
"I don't want the easiest way down, I want the fucking powder"

**jonesy** · 01-30-2015, 08:15 AM

I would of paid good money to see that. Expecially the badass senior skater tear him up.

Originally Posted by raueda1

So I get hooked up with a weird guy on a sidecountry trip behind Stowe (don't ask). The return was through their nordic area, miles of perfectly groomed skate trails and XC tracks. Coming out it's slightly downhill, so it's easy to skate & pole out except for a couple small bumps that you need to herringbone or aggressively skate up.

So, I'm well ahead of this guy, who turned out to be pitifully out of shape, and turn around to see what he's doing. To my amazement he's carrying his skis up a little 10ft incline and postholing up in the XC track. I yell at him to get the hell out of the track. He yells back at me that he doesn't give a shit. Not 3 seconds later some badass 70 year old woman comes blasting by and shouts at him to "Young man, get out of that track immediately!!! They work very hard to make it and you're ruining it for everyone!" So then the guys screams FUUUUUCKKKK!!! at the top of his lungs, literally throws his skis into the woods and starts beating them with his poles. Complete meltdown tantrum. I've never seen anything like it before or since. I headed back the car and haven't seen him since.

**raueda1** · 01-30-2015, 10:00 AM

The same guy had numerous tantrums. He slipped into a kind of ski group I was running at the time and quickly proved himself to be a very exceptional person. Just lasted 2 days, never saw him after the meltdown. But he provided us with some other moments to cherish.

To paint a better picture, he wore one of those old NF Steep Tech jackets. They're just festooned with straps, zippers, belts, buckles and all kinds of useless hardware. There are at least 12 zippers on the front. This guy had little toy carabiners hanging off of all but 2 of the zipper pulls. On those he had a keychain/Crackerjack box toy compass (just in case) and a tiny squeegee for goggles. Looked like a walking Christmas tree. You can't make this shit up.

The day before the meltdown we're getting off a lift but he yells that he's stuck. He rides about halfway around the bullwheel and then there's a kind of bang and he slides off. I ask him WTF? He says that he must have gotten stuck to ice on the chair. I said bullshit, that's impossible, and then noticed that the waist belt on his stupid jacket, which was buckled behind his back, had been completely torn out. The buckle had apparently snagged on the chair. His escape plan sacrificed the jacket.

**old goat** · 01-30-2015, 10:18 AM

Originally Posted by raueda1

The same guy had numerous tantrums. He slipped into a kind of ski group I was running at the time and quickly proved himself to be a very exceptional person. Just lasted 2 days, never saw him after the meltdown. But he provided us with some other moments to cherish.

To paint a better picture, he wore one of those old NF Steep Tech jackets. They're just festooned with straps, zippers, belts, buckles and all kinds of useless hardware. There are at least 12 zippers on the front. This guy had little toy carabiners hanging off of all but 2 of the zipper pulls. On those he had a keychain/Crackerjack box toy compass (just in case) and a tiny squeegee for goggles. Looked like a walking Christmas tree. You can't make this shit up.

The day before the meltdown we're getting off a lift but he yells that he's stuck. He rides about halfway around the bullwheel and then there's a kind of bang and he slides off. I ask him WTF? He says that he must have gotten stuck to ice on the chair. I said bullshit, that's impossible, and then noticed that the waist belt on his stupid jacket, which was buckled behind his back, had been completely torn out. The buckle had apparently snagged on the chair. His escape plan sacrificed the jacket.

Hey don't knock the goggle squeegee--nice to have when skiing through the guns, which has been all too frequent around here the last few seasons.

**PNWbrit** · 01-30-2015, 10:25 AM

Originally Posted by old goat

Hey don't knock the goggle squeegee--nice to have when skiing through the guns, which has been all too frequent around here the last few seasons.

Are they the same colour as your cat tracks?

**old goat** · 01-30-2015, 10:26 AM

Originally Posted by PNWbrit

Are they the same colour as your cat tracks?

Nah, green. No cattracks either--skitrax, which are much better, seriously.

**PNWbrit** · 01-30-2015, 10:29 AM

Originally Posted by old goat

skitrax, which are much better, seriously.

You're taking the piss?

Hopefully.

**stuckathuntermtn** · 01-30-2015, 10:44 AM

Originally Posted by raueda1

The same guy had numerous tantrums. He slipped into a kind of ski group I was running at the time and quickly proved himself to be a very exceptional person. Just lasted 2 days, never saw him after the meltdown. But he provided us with some other moments to cherish.

To paint a better picture, he wore one of those old NF Steep Tech jackets. They're just festooned with straps, zippers, belts, buckles and all kinds of useless hardware. There are at least 12 zippers on the front. This guy had little toy carabiners hanging off of all but 2 of the zipper pulls. On those he had a keychain/Crackerjack box toy compass (just in case) and a tiny squeegee for goggles. Looked like a walking Christmas tree. You can't make this shit up.

The day before the meltdown we're getting off a lift but he yells that he's stuck. He rides about halfway around the bullwheel and then there's a kind of bang and he slides off. I ask him WTF? He says that he must have gotten stuck to ice on the chair. I said bullshit, that's impossible, and then noticed that the waist belt on his stupid jacket, which was buckled behind his back, had been completely torn out. The buckle had apparently snagged on the chair. His escape plan sacrificed the jacket.

That jacket doesn't look safe. I would still love to see someone in a beaver tail with it.

**snoqpass** · 01-30-2015, 11:25 AM

Originally Posted by PNWbrit

On my commute home the other night I-90 express lane ramp in Seattle stadium district. A single lane, jersey barrier lined, elevated ramp about 3/4 mile long that spits you out into Baker lid tunnel, then the middle span of floating bridge, then Mercer Island

Car in front of me gradually slows.

Then Stops.

The inevitably Asian driver gets out of car walks back to mine. Asks, "Excuse me where does this road go to?"

WTF?

Usually they stop in the middle of the road with a turn signal on waiting for someone to let them in

**TomCrac** · 01-30-2015, 11:42 AM

Originally Posted by raueda1

The same guy had numerous tantrums. He slipped into a kind of ski group I was running at the time and quickly proved himself to be a very exceptional person. Just lasted 2 days, never saw him after the meltdown. But he provided us with some other moments to cherish.

To paint a better picture, he wore one of those old NF Steep Tech jackets. They're just festooned with straps, zippers, belts, buckles and all kinds of useless hardware. There are at least 12 zippers on the front. This guy had little toy carabiners hanging off of all but 2 of the zipper pulls. On those he had a keychain/Crackerjack box toy compass (just in case) and a tiny squeegee for goggles. Looked like a walking Christmas tree. You can't make this shit up.

The day before the meltdown we're getting off a lift but he yells that he's stuck. He rides about halfway around the bullwheel and then there's a kind of bang and he slides off. I ask him WTF? He says that he must have gotten stuck to ice on the chair. I said bullshit, that's impossible, and then noticed that the waist belt on his stupid jacket, which was buckled behind his back, had been completely torn out. The buckle had apparently snagged on the chair. His escape plan sacrificed the jacket.

That story mad me sad.

**jonesy** · 01-30-2015, 01:15 PM

Came cookn off a inter-change from 5 to 84 in a loaded semi years ago. As I round the bend going down hill here's a Asian parked in the lane changing a tire with the drivers door open. GOD looks over fools. Shot the gap and hammered down to the nxt town.

**southern_expat** · 01-30-2015, 01:36 PM

I almost took some one's Porche cayan's door off this weekend. I shit you not...stopped in their lane (oncoming) on a corner with their door in my lane & no shoulder taking a cell phone pic.

Not sure of their ethnicity but in my experience, stupidity crosses all barriers.

**old goat** · 01-30-2015, 08:44 PM

Originally Posted by southern_expat

I almost took some one's Porche cayan's door off this weekend. I shit you not...stopped in their lane (oncoming) on a corner with their door in my lane & no shoulder taking a cell phone pic.

Not sure of their ethnicity but in my experience, stupidity crosses all barriers.

Pic of a moose?

**jamal** · 01-31-2015, 02:12 AM

Have not heard of the porch cayan. Who makes that?

Whenever I am driving my grandfather somewhere, if I point out another driver doing something dumb he snaps to the "asian or a woman I bet!'

No grandpa, just some guy. Bad drivers know no limits.

**dcpnz** · 01-31-2015, 08:49 AM

Particularly gaperific with his buddies ski there I thought

**Cocximus** · 01-31-2015, 08:56 AM

That jacket looks like a bondage suit lol. I do dig the not in your chin zipper though.

**Shadam** · 01-31-2015, 09:14 PM

have you ever noticed when doing carpentry work that your pencil gets shorter as the week goes on ...

every day its harder to reach in the pocket ???

**Dshack89** · 01-31-2015, 09:32 PM

A few weeks ago I was skiing Catherine's at Alta. I had just finished the boot pack and was waiting for the dude in front of me to click into his skis. The guy is taking forever so I finally sidestep buy him. As I skate past him, I give a tow-rope-wedgie quality laugh as I see that he is trying to put his skis on backwards...He was really struggling to get his toes clicked into the heelpiece. Twin tips FTW!