Coaching young kids sports teams

[Mazderati]

sports are not important - end of story

You don't get to decide what is important to who.

[DBdude]

so that's the perspective to view team participation - the team you are coaching is all about your kid? an eight year old really knows what is important?

my eight year old is crazy for mine craft - guess what - it's not important

[DBdude]

You don't get to decide what is important to who.

I do for my kid and what I participate in

I don't make decisions for others

[Timberridge]

I wasn't arguing for any particular stereotyped approach

kids who come to organized sports with no sense of organization, they're going to be uncoachable, shouldn't parents be helping their kids with social skills like ...um... being respectful? you don't have to put your kid in organized sports, why make organized sports become disorganized sports? because now it's a babysitter not an athletic experience? if it's just a babysitter, why are so many helicopter parents in there telling coach they think he's bullying the kids? couldn't they find a day care, or is that not what cool parents do now if they're afraid to let their kids run free after school? the best Q may be, why are parents so afraid to let their kids run free and play casual sports via free association? and why, while complaining that organized sports are too rigorous/roughneck/bullying?

I agree, and I'm not advocating turning sports into Sunday School. Unfortunately times have changed and you no longer see a group of kids riding their bikes to the field on their own to play unsupervised sports. Everything is done under the watchful eye of parents. I think that's a shame.

I deal with the cards as they are dealt. In my town, parents pay $100 a season to have their kids play baseball whether the kid is a natural athlete, or an artist there for socialization skills. I have no preconception that even my best players at 9 yrs old will become superstars later because I coached them. I've had divorced parents fighting in the bleachers during games, parents yelling me and at umpires, and kids who show up w/ no glove to a game, etc. I also had one kid last year who was quite uncoordinated, but loved baseball and tried his hardest at everything. Just to see him progress from a low skill level to a (less) low skill level was quite rewarding for me as a coach.

I'm also competing with lax for town funding and player participation. Somehow it boils down to a (volunteer) coach dancing the fine line between discipline and teaching while not pissing too many folks off, all the while ensuring that you somehow instill the love of the game in the 95% of the kids who will never play the game after the age when youth programs end.

[4matic]

so that's the perspective to view team participation - the team you are coaching is all about your kid? an eight year old really knows what is important?

There is vast contradiction in this post vs previous posts.

[creaky fossil]

my eight year old is crazy for mine craft - guess what - it's not important

he should set up an online site where he's the Minecraft expert, doling out strategies as a precocious tycoon of a burgeoning economic paradigm, just like J R Vansant

There is vast contradiction in this post vs previous posts.

and thus, the entire gambit was exposed
flags at half mast, people

[DBdude]

who is it that keeps forcing DBdude's kids to play in organized sports? that person's obviously an idiot!

nobody does. It's the poor experiences they have had and why does the basketball coach for my oldest keep asking me to get my kid to play? they need bodies, and it has been such a poor experience for so many, nobody wants to play

[4matic]

Everything is done under the watchful eye of parents. I think that's a shame.
.

I talk to parents about that. They have no choice.. If they let their kids run free they risk getting ridiculed, chastised, or worse. The car line to pick up kids at my local High School is a half mile long.

[DBdude]

There is vast contradiction in this post vs previous posts.

oh stop, I understand what you mean and that is bullshit

my point is eight year olds don't need a super structured environment. Booner's team is different because it is a club team. something I wouldn't put an eight year old in

my 12 year old played after school basketball for four years and one year of AAU and walked because it sucked. he had the same experience I did at that level. poor coaching that led to humiliating losses and poor team play where he ran up down the floor to stand like a post under the basket because of his height and never getting the ball after he passed it off.

[creaky fossil]

I talk to parents about that. They have no choice.. If they let their kids run free they risk getting ridiculed, chastised, or worse. The car line to pick up kids at my local High School is a half mile long.

it's amazing what people will do in order to feel like their behavior "fits in," even if that means stunting their child's development they'll try to "fit in"

astounding

[Mazderati]

sports are not important - end of story

I don't make decisions for others

Apparently that doesn't stop you from trying.

[booner]

the conduct of your athletes is what you have to deal with. don't like, don't do it

most parents are idiots - get used to it

I agree

I don't have to deal with any bullshit from parents yet really....all playing time is equal still

[creaky fossil]

my 12 year old played after school basketball for four years and one year of AAU and walked because it sucked. he had the same experience I did at that level. poor coaching that led to humiliating losses and poor team play where he ran up down the floor to stand like a post under the basket because of his height and never getting the ball after he passed it off.

nobody made him play basketball, right? what's the humiliation?

I got cut from jr high basketball and HS tennis. so what? I wasn't humiliated. what would be "humiliating" about that? I could still play casual BB with friends, casual tennis with friends, nobody was stopping me/us, and we could be as competitive as we wanted. sometimes it was serious, people even got angry! and no referees to immediately declare a foul had happened or a player needed to be booted. how did anyone even have any fun without referees, paint lines, uniforms, and parents to 2d hand live through our deeds?

gosh. it's almost like humans are afraid of some of their own tendencies. like people who want to say "I'm not competitive," when you see other areas of their life where they clearly are very driven and competitive.

[booner]

Booner's team is different because it is a club team. something I wouldn't put an eight year old in.

not to say your choice is wrong, but....if a kid wants to play club travel at any point, they have to be there from the start. 5 yrs old is the avg age that players start and always has been

And this is nothing new...not part of the craziness sports have become. Hockey is very different because of the skating. You can put a gifted athlete in football, baseball, golf, basketball, etc at a later age and they can pick it up and do fine.

All good hockey players started very young...the ones that didn't can never catch up

There are guys in the NFL and NBA that didn't play until HS

Every single professional/college/good HS hockey player started at 5 or younger....every one

[creaky fossil]

All good hockey players started very young...the ones that didn't can never catch up

the more it's like walking...

there are occasional exceptions like Jordan in BB, Larry Nelson in the PGA in the 80s was fairly successful despite a late start, but the more it's like walking...

[DBdude]

nobody made him play basketball, right? what's the humiliation?

I got cut from jr high basketball and HS tennis. so what? I wasn't humiliated. what would be "humiliating" about that? I could still play casual BB with friends, casual tennis with friends, nobody was stopping me/us, and we could be as competitive as we wanted. sometimes it was serious, people even got angry! and no referees to immediately declare a foul had happened or a player needed to be booted. how did anyone even have any fun without referees, paint lines, uniforms, and parents to 2d hand live through our deeds?

gosh. it's almost like humans are afraid of some of their own tendencies. like people who want to say "I'm not competitive," when you see other areas of their life where they clearly are very driven and competitive.

I guess we both take losing badly - or I take losing badly and project it on him - that said he wont play organized ball anymore - I know for a fact he didn't have fun. It was the same experience I had. you liked it - more matue outlook or a love for the game(s). he and I both lack that love for the game. I have only enjoyed non team sports. I liked hockey and still love soccer, but participating on organized teams always sucked.

What I have railed about over and over again, is the over seriousness for third graders organized sports. there is a lot of diversity at that age in maturity and coaches and parents take it way too seriously

[creaky fossil]

it's not hard to take "less serious" kids and give them a soccer ball and a place to kick it around

I find it incredible, the current generation of young kids' parents like you're describing (elem/middle) is affluent and well-educated compared to when I was their age, and yet the parents seem to seek complexity instead of the obvious solution I just gave. they seem inclined to demur on parental obligations and push them onto schools for behavioral training between breakfast and mid-afternoon, with sports leagues the next surrogate in line, all so parents can hustle their $$ to buy more trinkets and afford those prep school fees. money, not guidance. stuff, not nurture. I guess the affluence feels good somehow, and makes up in other ways for the neg ways in which its pursuit (imbalance of career/parental attention) affects the kids.

[DBdude]

not to say your choice is wrong, but....if a kid wants to play club travel at any point, they have to be there from the start. 5 yrs old is the avg age that players start and always has been

And this is nothing new...not part of the craziness sports have become. Hockey is very different because of the skating. You can put a gifted athlete in football, baseball, golf, basketball, etc at a later age and they can pick it up and do fine.

All good hockey players started very young...the ones that didn't can never catch up

There are guys in the NFL and NBA that didn't play until HS

Every single professional/college/good HS hockey player started at 5 or younger....every one

yes I know - I grew up on skates - my parents are dutch - talk about stereo types. I was on skates as soon as I could walk

I put my oldest on skates to get him ready to ski - thank god he did it just to humor me

I am so glad they both didn't have an interest in the sport. I prefer sleeping in on the weekend and schleping to the hill for a couple of hours and then back home with meadow skipping on week days and more downhill on vacations and snow days

[DBdude]

it's not hard to take "less serious" kids and give them a soccer ball and a place to kick it around

dude - i live in the country and don't get home till 6:30 - then it's make dinner - homework

there is no neighborhood

[DBdude]

ok - i'm done

didn't mean to denigrate anyone - I just hate people taking sports seriously

a family member groomed their kid for d1 hockey (talk of pros - yes I know - unbelievable) - prep school the whole 9 yards. injured himself at prep school - now playing d3

booner you know the program before he went to proctor - skaneatalas NY

they literally talked pro prospect - dedicated substantial time and resources - not going to happen - what bafoons

[booner]

ok - i'm done

didn't mean to denigrate anyone - I just hate people taking sports seriously

a family member groomed their kid for d1 hockey (talk of pros - yes I know - unbelievable) - prep school the whole 9 yards. injured himself at prep school - now playing d3

booner you know the program before he went to proctor - skaneatalas NY

they literally talked pro prospect - dedicated substantial time and resources - not going to happen - what bafoons

Yep...played against them a lot

If the kid had made the pros, would they still be bafoons?

I never saw the kid play, so who knows...but maybe he really did have what it takes and his parents were willing to give it a shot.

I played with guys that were 1st round draft picks and STILL didn't make it...there's so much talent it's next to impossible to make it even if you're good enough to do it


This guy was on my team till he left for OHL. Biggest bust in NHL history

http://prohockeytalk.nbcsports.com/2...on-bonsignore/

he was a doosh. got jumped for running his mouth by 4 guys at a school dance right before nationals. he had to cut his jaw wires to get a mouthguard in so he could play

[creaky fossil]

i made it back, was out yelling at the kids to get off my lawn.

hah it's like a little jolt of caffeine!

[creaky fossil]

dude - i live in the country and don't get home till 6:30 - then it's make dinner - homework

there is no neighborhood

right, but the kids can't play between last bell and your 6:30 arrival? what do you mean, "no neighborhood"? your house/apartment/condo/etc has no land surrounding it? no place a kid could kick a ball, ride a bike, ride a skateboard, use a pogo stick, drift a BigWheel? are you bats living in caves? moles living in an underground tunnel network?

even bat and mole youth get to play!

i need both to feel better.
i've been coaching the kids getting off the school bus to hurry the fuck up crossing the street.

frogger used to be a good indirect lesson on that one, but today a kid might get a frogger app on her phone and stop mid-crossing to make sure the frog makes it

[skiballs]

Well you retards shit the sandbox nicely.

Booner you're a good coach. Don't sweet the little shit. There will be those moments, that will make it all worth it.
Let's play some golf someday, get drunk, stoned and swap stories.

[Timberridge]

Booner, I think you're a good coach too.

Golf is for old men and weed just makes you lazy. Let's go bang some of the hot hockey moms then drive around town...throwing empty beer cans out the car window and shitting on the porches of the parents we don't like. A coaches night out, if you will.