Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

**The SnowShow** · 01-12-2011, 02:42 PM

I am constantly amazed how gapers don't get that snow levels around the mtn. vary...heard a girl on the Zuma lift complaining about the thin snow on the knoll below the lift about halfway up, as if the whole mtn. was skiing bad. She said "I thought it has been snowing a lot up here? Guess not."

**EC_tech** · 01-12-2011, 05:02 PM

older dude in full neon fartbag on some 210's...."LIKE RIDING A BIKE, WILLY!"

glad to see him getting back at it

**D-ROCK** · 01-12-2011, 08:35 PM

Originally Posted by EC_tech

older dude in full neon fartbag on some 210's...."LIKE RIDING A BIKE, WILLY!"

glad to see him getting back at it

haha thats awesome.

**mangled** · 01-12-2011, 08:39 PM

good one today, found a guy on top of the cbc waterfall on rental skis,
"you know thats a watferfall drop"
"no why isnt this better marked"
"cause were about half a km out of bounds"
"o thats what those signs meant i went by"

**californiagrown** · 01-12-2011, 08:44 PM

Originally Posted by PhiberAwptik

From Newschoolers gear trade:

"I'm selling my hellbents because we don't get enough snow in Montana to justify owning these"

normally i wouldnt say this but.... Pics or STFU!
if it was true you should be able to screenshot that thread and prove it.
otherwise you are just a dbag who is trying to prove just how extreme he is

go hit jamie pierre's cliff... in the summer

asshat

**farmer** · 01-12-2011, 10:39 PM

^^ You might be an alias, but if not, you seem to fit in pretty well for a JONG.

**curtisbb** · 01-13-2011, 12:09 AM

I had a pretty good one last Friday morning standing in the Emerald lift line:
Gaper: "I've never seen a board like that, what's it good for?" (Lib-tech Banana Hammock)
Me: "Powder and pretty much days like today."
Gaper: "So is it good for rails?"
Me: "Ummm...........no, not really"

**Wes Mantooth** · 01-13-2011, 12:28 AM

Originally Posted by californiagrown

normally i wouldnt say this but.... Pics or STFU!
if it was true you should be able to screenshot that thread and prove it.
otherwise you are just a dbag who is trying to prove just how extreme he is

go hit jamie pierre's cliff... in the summer

asshat

This can be the best gaper quote I heard this weekend.

**PearlJam09** · 01-13-2011, 07:27 AM

Night skiing at Sundown after CT's Snowpocalypse 2011, one of the trails had a pretty decent kicker built into the side of it. We'd taken runs all night and enjoyed catching air off of it, until one run when things went awry.

My buddy went first and hit it, I followed after I knew that it was safe, admittedly failing to call my drop. There was a couple, (woman on a snowboard, guy on skis) about 2/3 of the way between my starting point and where the kicker was, that I figured had just stopped and were watching since from there they wouldn't have enough speed do anything besides ride up and over the kicker and fall straight off the backside.

As I approached them, the woman, WITHOUT LOOKING BACK UPHILL starts going, I pull up, but in the process scare her, and she doesn't hit the jump, but speedchecks and stops directly in the landing.

Her: "What the fuck!?!"
Me: "Sorry. Didn't realize you were going to go. Anyways, you're in the landing, can you slide left."
Her: "I was gonna take a picture of him"
Me: "Well I don't want to land on you so can you please move"

She moves over, I hit it. I decide that its my responsibility to instruct her on what mistakes we both made in the situation.

Me: "Just to let you know, you should look up the hill before you start going in the future in case someone is coming from behind you."
Her: "You fucking f-----. You cut me off."
Me: "Actually, you were below me and you started without looking. Technically, you cut me off."
Her Toughguy Boyfriend: "Don't talk shit to my girlfriend! I'll kick your ass."

He continues to make threats about kicking mine and my buddy's asses.

I ignore him and continue to try to explain that: a) she still could have hit the jump since I'd stopped, and b) she needed to look uphill before she started.

As we were exchanging words, she heelslipped down to where me and my buddy were standing, and took a swing at me. Her fist glanced off my shoulder and she fell down, and instead of getting up, she tried to throw snow at us, while calling us douchebags.

The boyfriend was still yelling at us, and we bailed before the situation escalated into something even uglier.

What amazes me is why someone could be so angry on a powder day...

**boltonoutlaw** · 01-13-2011, 07:34 AM

Originally Posted by PearlJam09

What amazes me is why someone could be so angry on a powder day...

You are in the vortex of Patheticut, you should be used to the SOP.

**time2clmb** · 01-13-2011, 07:56 AM

Originally Posted by PearlJam09

Night skiing at Sundown after CT's Snowpocalypse 2011, one of the trails had a pretty decent kicker built into the side of it. We'd taken runs all night and enjoyed catching air off of it, until one run when things went awry.

My buddy went first and hit it, I followed after I knew that it was safe, admittedly failing to call my drop. There was a couple, (woman on a snowboard, guy on skis) about 2/3 of the way between my starting point and where the kicker was, that I figured had just stopped and were watching since from there they wouldn't have enough speed do anything besides ride up and over the kicker and fall straight off the backside.

As I approached them, the woman, WITHOUT LOOKING BACK UPHILL starts going, I pull up, but in the process scare her, and she doesn't hit the jump, but speedchecks and stops directly in the landing.

Her: "What the fuck!?!"
Me: "Sorry. Didn't realize you were going to go. Anyways, you're in the landing, can you slide left."
Her: "I was gonna take a picture of him"
Me: "Well I don't want to land on you so can you please move"

She moves over, I hit it. I decide that its my responsibility to instruct her on what mistakes we both made in the situation.

Me: "Just to let you know, you should look up the hill before you start going in the future in case someone is coming from behind you."
Her: "You fucking f-----. You cut me off."
Me: "Actually, you were below me and you started without looking. Technically, you cut me off."
Her Toughguy Boyfriend: "Don't talk shit to my girlfriend! I'll kick your ass."

He continues to make threats about kicking mine and my buddy's asses.

I ignore him and continue to try to explain that: a) she still could have hit the jump since I'd stopped, and b) she needed to look uphill before she started.

As we were exchanging words, she heelslipped down to where me and my buddy were standing, and took a swing at me. Her fist glanced off my shoulder and she fell down, and instead of getting up, she tried to throw snow at us, while calling us douchebags.

The boyfriend was still yelling at us, and we bailed before the situation escalated into something even uglier.

What amazes me is why someone could be so angry on a powder day...

Jong. No harm no foul, she was down hill regardless of whether or not she looked up, which she should have. Bottom line is she was down hill from you, and then you lectured her about it being her fault for not looking up hill....good for her for telling you off.

**Sinecure** · 01-13-2011, 08:11 AM

Originally Posted by time2clmb

Jong. No harm no foul, she was down hill regardless of whether or not she looked up, which she should have. Bottom line is she was down hill from you, and then you lectured her about it being her fault for not looking up hill....good for her for telling you off.

That's not true. At least the way he told the story, he lived up to his side of the responsibility code. He avoided colliding with a downhill skier.

She took a swing at you? WTF? Had to be from some tough part of CT like Bridgeport or something.

**PearlJam09** · 01-13-2011, 08:32 AM

Originally Posted by time2clmb

Jong. No harm no foul, she was down hill regardless of whether or not she looked up, which she should have. Bottom line is she was down hill from you, and then you lectured her about it being her fault for not looking up hill....good for her for telling you off.

She was a MOTIONLESS rider. She had stopped, and her and her BF were discussing why snow was white or some other such shit.

From the Skier responsibility code:
"Whenever starting downhill or merging into a trail, look uphill and yield to others."

She failed to look uphill when starting downhill.

I avoided a collision with her, following:
"People ahead of you have the right of way. It is your responsibility to avoid them. "
and
"Always stay in control, and be able to stop or avoid other people or objects. "

Until she started moving, she was an inanimate object which I would have avoided.

One of us was following the skier responsibility code, one of us wasn't.

Would you ever get onto the highway without looking over your shoulder?

Jong.

Originally Posted by Sinecure

That's not true. At least the way he told the story, he lived up to his side of the responsibility code. He avoided colliding with a downhill skier.

She took a swing at you? WTF? Had to be from some tough part of CT like Bridgeport or something.

Probably Waterbury. I get the feeling that the pair may have had a few screws loose....

**time2clmb** · 01-13-2011, 09:07 AM

I like how you totally ignored the part where I acknowledged that she should have looked up. "which she should have".

**PearlJam09** · 01-13-2011, 09:18 AM

Originally Posted by time2clmb

I like how you totally ignored the part where I acknowledged that she should have looked up. "which she should have".

My bad. Reading comprehension is suffering this morning due to extreme jealousy of those at MAGIC right now while I'm stuck in New Haven.

**old goat** · 01-13-2011, 11:51 AM

Originally Posted by mangled

good one today, found a guy on top of the cbc waterfall on rental skis,
"you know thats a watferfall drop"
"no why isnt this better marked"
"cause were about half a km out of bounds"
"o thats what those signs meant i went by"

Excellent. But didn't you leave out the part where the guys does a double backflip and nails it?

jgb@etree · 01-13-2011, 12:07 PM

Originally Posted by boltonoutlaw

You are in the vortex of Patheticut, you should be used to the SOP.

No worse than being a guilder, right?

**butterscotch** · 01-13-2011, 01:33 PM

Overheard at Bridger Bowl during Christmas week while riding the *NEW* Bridger lift:

Guy, gesturing to mid-station: Has this always been here?

His buddy, with a touch of disdain: It's a new lift.

**time2clmb** · 01-13-2011, 02:10 PM

At Sunshine Village on the Standish chair. Gorby, while looking directly and pointing to the Divide chair, "how do we get over to that chair?, does it go to the top?". He says this while looking over a very obvious and direct run to get there. Also, you can see exactly where it tops out and it was bluebird.

**Bobcat Sig** · 01-13-2011, 02:46 PM

Originally Posted by PhiberAwptik

From Newschoolers gear trade:

"I'm selling my hellbents because we don't get enough snow in Montana to justify owning these"

Bullshit. That guy is an asshat. But them off of him for cheap and then beat him over the head with them.

**jjdec5** · 01-13-2011, 03:01 PM

Originally Posted by guroo270

Me at 5:45 this morning in Boulder - "Hey darlin', Vail just got 5 inches, want to make a run up there?"
gaper wife - "I can stay in bed and get more than 5 inches..."

probably the funniest thing in here.

**PowderHound93** · 01-13-2011, 03:06 PM

I was going up the lift with a middle aged gapper and he said "You must get amazing edge grip with skis that long".. I was riding 195 Praxis Powder boards. Hes right my reverse/reverse skis work wonders on groomers, you have no idea *cough* In his defense funshape skis are a terrifying/confusing topic for gappers I wouldnt expect him to understand the purpose of the ski besides its obvious applications to water sports such as water skiing =P

**karpiel** · 01-13-2011, 06:58 PM

Skiing is a water sport.

(What's a "gapper"?)

Oh yea, saw a guy wedging down the groomers with a go pro. Feel sorry for his friends.

**Micol** · 01-13-2011, 10:40 PM

Had to sit through a 30 tower chairlift ride this morning with a drama filled domestic dispute in full swing next to me btwn guy and girl. The girl kept saying things to me to get me to reinforce her points. I finally just said, you'll forget about all this once you're out on the snow.....(although they probably wouldn't) jeese leave me out of it....it's why I ski alone...

**DasBlunt** · 01-13-2011, 10:49 PM

Originally Posted by MiCol

Had to sit through a 30 tower chairlift ride this morning with a drama filled domestic dispute in full swing next to me btwn guy and girl. The girl kept saying things to me to get me to reinforce her points. I finally just said, you'll forget about all this once you're out on the snow.....(although they probably wouldn't) jeese leave me out of it....it's why I ski alone...

What was the subject? Fuck, if she was hot I would have been looking for a rebound hut fuck.