Dear Diary, I just got off the phone with a hudge bitch of a realtor

[RootSkier]

Yes lady, I realize your clients didn't like our offer. It's called 'lowballing.' You have had this listing for 268 days, and you were dumb enough to tell my clients you have only had three showings.

Don't come crying to me because your client was upset. I don't give a shit. Yeah, I told my clients you might be pissed off...they laughed. Deal with it, but don't call me and complain. I have had to present shitty offers, too.

So here's the deal: we may or may not be able to put something together, but don't be a whiney bitch, because we are probably going to have to deal with each other numerous times.

P.S. Anytime you make a reference to how many years you have been doing this kind of thing and blah blah blah, I know immediately how bad you suck at your job.

[rideit]

Jeez, I am now just SO excited about my new profession.

Yummy biscuits!

[Stone-Free]

P.S. Anytime an agent makes reference to how many years they have been doing this kind of thing and blah blah blah, I know immediately how bad you suck at your job.

I feel you.

I had a contractor call me when I did the appraisal on a new construction a while back. The appraisal came in about $17K lower than what he was thinking. He told me about how he had been building houses forever, and how good his quality was (average) and blah blah.

He then asked me how long I'd been an licensed appraiser and how I didnt know my ass from a hole in the ground, ect, ect.

Screaming into the phone he asked me who was going to pay for the excess dirt removal and excavation costs, and I told him, "for a guy who has been in the business forever, you'd think you would have figured in those costs into your initial bid. I cant create another $17K in value out of nowhere because your a dumb ass." The old fuck was speechless.

And people wonder why appraisers have bad attitudes

[Beaver]

I feel you.

Are you a homo? Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[Core Shot]

Yes lady, I realize your clients didn't like our offer. It's called 'lowballing.'

[Your Diary]

Dear RootSkier,

Oh. My. Fucking. God. This has got to stop. Honestly, get a fucking grip, accept the fact that you're lousy at your job, and look for a new career. Let's think of some possibilities. How about a phone book? You get to help people find answers, that's good. And there are addresses, which are real estate related. Or maybe some kind of cook book? That would be good too. Food is delicious, I hear.

Okay, fine, these probably not realistic for you, but what the fuck do I know? I'm just trying to help as best a collection of wood pulp and fabric can. Now if you'll quit your pathetic whining for five minutes, I'm going to go jerk off to that shit you wrote three pages ago about the girl who works at the recycling center going down on Bea Arthur.

[Stone-Free]

Are you a homo? Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Thanks for your interest Beaver, but I'm straighter than a grizzlies dick.

However, if you'd get off yer ass and post some poon, you could save a good many guys on the board from turning soy...

[rideit]

I'm going to go jerk off to that shit you wrote three pages ago about the girl who works at the recycling center going down on Bea Arthur.

After putting you in the second drawer with the sticky socks and she male porn, you go and do this to me?
You two timing little literary excuse for a book.
You are a waste of paper and binding glue.

Slut.

[MeatPuppet]

I'm going to go jerk off...

If my diary had a dick, I'd throw it in the fireplace.

Not that I'm homophobic or anything. I just think it would be distracting to be writing about my date last night, feel something poking me in the stomach, look down and find that my diary had a woody.

I mean seriously, what self respecting heterosexual male is going to be able to write a coherent sentence with that going on?




























Have you thought about seeing if Rontele needs a diary?

[Beaver]

Thanks for your interest Beaver, but I'm straighter than a grizzlies dick.

However, if you'd get off yer ass and post some poon, you could save a good many guys on the board from turning soy...

I'm feeling rather worthless & despondant, the last 3 poon posts I tried rexed. I've got to find a site that allows hotlinking.

[cascadianwarrior]

Yes lady, I realize your clients didn't like our offer. It's called 'lowballing.' You have had this listing for 268 days, and you were dumb enough to tell my clients you have only had three showings.

Don't come crying to me because your client was upset. I don't give a shit. Yeah, I told my clients you might be pissed off...they laughed. Deal with it, but don't call me and complain. I have had to present shitty offers, too.

So here's the deal: we may or may not be able to put something together, but don't be a whiney bitch, because we are probably going to have to deal with each other numerous times.

P.S. Anytime you make a reference to how many years you have been doing this kind of thing and blah blah blah, I know immediately how bad you suck at your job.

I've had to present some pretty shitty offers but NEVER have I called the other agent to complain about a offer. That's just bad business because you know that your paths will continue to cross for years. Listing agent, seriously, ask your clients this: 'Do you really want to sell this house? If so, then get a grip, counter-offer this motherfucker and let's all get $$paid$$!'

[smitchell333]

Ohhh the professionalism thats so prevalent in residential real estate.

I've had brokers vomit all over my clients' offers before - so much so that I've been convinced they were never even presented.

I don't understand why some think its such a big deal to present a low-ball offer. Tell them before hand - "its pretty low, but lets take a look and we'll counter if it makes any sense." If its too low, its too low.

Clearly here having been on the market for going on a year its overpriced.

Fuck em.

[mrryde]

"How dare you make an offer on my house, what do you think, we actually want to sell this place?"

I never understood why people get insulted by offers, its a fucking offer, nothing personal, either counter or STFU.

[mcsquared]

When I bought my house, the lot next door was for sale at the same time. It was a dilapidated shack that was being sold for land value. The asking price was an obscene $175k. I thought it would be a wise purchase but I didn't have alot of cash at the time since i just bought my place. I called the agent and offered $75k. I probably would have paid in the low 90's. The agent laughed at me. Literally laughed at me and was very rude. I don't think he even presented the offer. 6 months later the lot sold for $80k. Dumbass cost his client at least 10g's and six months of time.

[pechelman]

having just been through this whole home buying bs, I concur with sellers and realtors being dumbasses when it comes to offers.

This one place i made a *low* offer, but definitely not "lowball". ~15% below asking price. Place had been on the market for 168days or so. The morons just completely ignore my offer, dont even counter. So then I come back with a slightly more generous offer, totally reasonable I might add (93% of asking), then their counter is 1% below the asking price.

The next day they took the house off the market.

which brings me to my next point
sellers need to be fuckign serious about selling their stupid fucking house or they shouldnt fucking list that house, waste everyone's time, and subsequently have another house I was interested in go under contract while we were fuckign waiting on their stupid fucking asses. /rant

[The Reverend Floater]

Question for you RE folks, as I am house hunting. In a relatively down market like we are experiencing now in MT, ID, WY, etc., what is an acceptable lowball offer, generally speaking. I mean, where's the line? Is it always a case by case basis? I've been looking at a house and my limit is about 10 - 14 percent below their asking price. Is this generally "way out there" or is this normal?

Love,

First Time Buyer, Long Time Renter

[mrryde]

Question for you RE folks, as I am house hunting. In a relatively down market like we are experiencing now in MT, ID, WY, etc., what is an acceptable lowball offer, generally speaking. I mean, where's the line? Is it always a case by case basis? I've been looking at a house and my limit is about 10 - 14 percent below their asking price. Is this generally "way out there" or is this normal?

Love,

First Time Buyer, Long Time Renter

You would be surprised about what people will accept. There are no hard rules I follow about presenting an offer, but i routinely make offers that are 20-25% below asking price. Sometimes i get laughed at and sometimes I get right to the bottom line.

[Danno]

You would be surprised about what people will accept. There are no hard rules I follow about presenting an offer, but i routinely make offers that are 20-25% below asking price. Sometimes i get laughed at and sometimes I get right to the bottom line.

The only "danger" is that presented in this thread, that your low ball offer may offend someone to the point that they don't want to counter or do business with you.

It's stupid, but this thread has demonstrated that it is reality.

[smitchell333]

Question for you RE folks, as I am house hunting. In a relatively down market like we are experiencing now in MT, ID, WY, etc., what is an acceptable lowball offer, generally speaking. I mean, where's the line? Is it always a case by case basis? I've been looking at a house and my limit is about 10 - 14 percent below their asking price. Is this generally "way out there" or is this normal?

Love,

First Time Buyer, Long Time Renter

You can never tell for sure until you submit an offer what they're willing to do.

The only time I might advise against offering significantly under the ask is if its a relatively seller's market and/or the property is new on the market, is unique, and offering low might simply mean you have no chance - esp if other buyers are likely drafting offers.

Otherwise base your offer on what you think the value of the property is. Have your agent run a quick market analysis. If you're a low-ball investor, then thats all you'll write and you'll probably be writing lots of offers. If you are looking for that special house with views, just the right layout, yard, location, etc and you find it and don't want to lose it - then offer full or close to full price.

[mavrick]

I'm straighter than a grizzlies dick.

Is anyone else wondering how he knows a bears dick is straight??

just askin...

[Tye 1on]

You can never tell for sure until you submit an offer what they're willing to do.

The only time I might advise against offering significantly under the ask is if its a relatively seller's market and/or the property is new on the market, is unique, and offering low might simply mean you have no chance - esp if other buyers are likely drafting offers.

Otherwise base your offer on what you think the value of the property is. Have your agent run a quick market analysis. If you're a low-ball investor, then thats all you'll write and you'll probably be writing lots of offers. If you are looking for that special house with views, just the right layout, yard, location, etc and you find it and don't want to lose it - then offer full or close to full price.

Never bought a house, just some land. But this advice sounds solid to me. I wonder if an offer that's lower than list because that's all the buyer can afford is looked at differently than a 'low-ball investor'. Just wonderin...

[SKISC]

Question for you RE folks, as I am house hunting. In a relatively down market like we are experiencing now in MT, ID, WY, etc., what is an acceptable lowball offer, generally speaking. I mean, where's the line? Is it always a case by case basis? I've been looking at a house and my limit is about 10 - 14 percent below their asking price. Is this generally "way out there" or is this normal?

Love,

First Time Buyer, Long Time Renter

Just throw the offer out there. Right now in my area you can expect to pay 96% +/- 1% of asking price (if priced right using the lastest and closest comps available). However as mrryde said, you would be surprised at what some will take. There are a lot of people who will put a very high price on a house just to see what happens. If some one buys it fine if no then they will lower it. An individuals financial situation can have an impact on what they will take as well. You can get some home relatively cheap if it will keep someone out of a reposition. Of course some will just fuck the house up and let it be reposesed.

[Venus Flytrap]

Don't let an agent strong arm you into making 'a higher offer.' We had one do this to us....under the guise of the old "they'll never go for that. How about upping it to_____."

Don't forget they work on commission. The more you spend, the more they make.

Some homeowners are just assholes. We put an offer on a house that was $10k below asking, and asked for a new roof and a few other incidentals that didn't add up to a whole lot of cash outlay, but some work. They rejected us flat. They countered with a full price offer and a roof tossed in. We countered with a lower offer than the first one, just because they were being pricks.

They countered -expecting us to keep playing- and we backed out entirely and bought another house. That house stayed on the market for another 6 months, and the selling price in the end? $10k BELOW our first bid!

Stand your ground on what you want at the price you want to pay. Ask for everything and anything you want. I've bought houses with riding mowers and furniture thrown in. You never know what you can get if you find a motivated seller.

[RootSkier]

Don't let an agent strong arm you into making 'a higher offer.' We had one do this to us....under the guise of the old "they'll never go for that. How about upping it to_____."

Don't forget they work on commission. The more you spend, the more they make.

You know, SOME agents might do this, but seriously. $30,000 in sales price equals $900 in commission (in an ideal world) which for me, is probably less than $600 in my pocket.

$600 is worthless compared to an excited client who feels like you helped them get the best deal they could. I would never, ever try to inflate the price of a deal, that would be ridiculous. Putting together deals where everyone feels they did well is far more important than a couple hundred bucks.

People in real estate live on referrals and repeat business, without it...nothing.

Stand your ground on what you want at the price you want to pay. Ask for everything and anything you want. I've bought houses with riding mowers and furniture thrown in. You never know what you can get if you find a motivated seller.

I sort of agree with this. It depends on the specific situation. I always tell people that it doesn't hurt to ask, as long as it's not ridiculous. You will never know a seller's level of motivation until you try.

That said, nickel and dime people to death, and you might just miss out on your dream house.

Plus, if you are never willing to compromise, your agent might fire you.

[InspectorGadget]

You have had this listing for 268 days ...

There is a ginormous difference between a listing and a house that is actually for sale; it sounds like this one was the former rather than the latter.

People in real estate live on referrals and repeat business, without it...nothing.

Amen brutha.