......You might live in Montana

**FreakofSnow** · 12-10-2006, 10:36 AM

Jeff Foxworthy's comments on Montana

If "vacation" to you means going shopping for the
weekend in Great Falls, Billings or Bozeman (while
the kids swim at the Comfort Inn), You might live in Montana.

If parking your car for the night involves an extension cord
You might live in Montana

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling
through 8 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the
food will swim by,
You might live in Montana.

If you're proud that your state makes the national news primarily
because it houses the coldest spot in the nation, You might live in
Montana.

If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too spendy",
You might live in Montana

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March,
You might live in Montana.

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work
there, You might live in Montana.

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his
forehead, You might live in Montana.

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time,
You might live in Montana.

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches,
You might live in Montana.

If you know how to correctly pronounce Butte, You might live in
Montana.

If you measure distance in hours, You might live in Montana.

If your family vehicle is a crew cab pickup, You might live in
Montana.

If you know several people who have hit deer more than once,
You might live in Montana.

If you often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back
again,
You might live in Montana.

If you can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging
blizzard,
without flinching, You might live in Montana.

If you see people wearing hunting clothes at social events,
You might live in Montana.

If you've installed security lights on your house and garage and leave
both unlocked, You might live in Montana.

If the largest traffic jam in your town centers around a high school
basketball game, You might live in Montana.

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how
to use them, You might live in Montana.

If there are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Wal-Mart at
any
given time, You might live in Montana.

If there are more people at work on Christmas Eve Day than on Deer gun
Opener, You might live in Montana.

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit,
You might live in Montana.

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled
with snow, You might live in Montana.

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and
road construction, You might live in Montana.

If you can identify a southern or eastern accent,
You might live in Montana.

If you consider Red Lodge exotic, You might live in Montana.

If your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to
your cottonwood,
You might live in Montana.

If the sunbelt to you means Miles City, You might live in Montana.

If a brat is something you eat, You might live in Montana.

If finding your misplaced car keys involves looking in the ignition,
You might live in Montana.

If you find 0 degrees a little chilly, You might live in Montana.

If you actually understand these observations, and you forward them
to all your Montana friends,
You must live in Montana

**AsheanMT** · 12-10-2006, 11:38 AM

that seems purty accurate.

**Steven S. Dallas** · 12-10-2006, 12:36 PM

If you're dumb as shit and have a crappy sense of humor, you might live in Montana.

**RyanSkiSurfSkate** · 12-10-2006, 01:59 PM

Yup, thats seems right,

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time,
You might live in Montana.

Yup...

**adampecush** · 12-10-2006, 04:42 PM

seems as though you could replace each Montana with Alberta and there wouldn't be a difference

**mtaylor** · 12-10-2006, 06:24 PM

Originally Posted by adampecush

seems as though you could replace each Montana with Alberta and there wouldn't be a difference

exactly what i was thinking. off to snow valley!

**shirk** · 12-10-2006, 07:17 PM

Originally Posted by adampecush

seems as though you could replace each Montana with Alberta and there wouldn't be a difference

Or Northern Ontario.

**mtmtneer** · 12-10-2006, 07:35 PM

Most of that is pretty right on, if you live in good ole' MT.

**AsheanMT** · 12-10-2006, 08:22 PM

Originally Posted by adampecush

seems as though you could replace each Montana with Alberta and there wouldn't be a difference

cept for the fact that there a helluva lot more guns in MT

**mntlion** · 12-10-2006, 08:28 PM

well more legal guns....

**Gripen** · 12-10-2006, 08:53 PM

Those rang very true....

If you measure distance in hours, You might live in Montana.
Loved that one, so true.

**coJibbin** · 12-10-2006, 10:13 PM

The same rules apply to Minnesota!

**FreakofSnow** · 12-10-2006, 10:53 PM

Originally Posted by Gripen

Those rang very true....

If you measure distance in hours, You might live in Montana.
Loved that one, so true.

Or if you measure distance in beers.....4 beers to Butte from Missoula.

**adampecush** · 12-10-2006, 10:53 PM

Originally Posted by mtaylor

exactly what i was thinking. off to snow valley!

Yeah...I'm not quite at home right now...It is 31C and toilets flow clockwise

I'd give a nut to be on the hill right now, but I am sure not missing -20 temperatures...Sydney beaches are damn nice too. However, I will certainly be making the most of April/May skiing this year.

**stump832** · 12-10-2006, 11:37 PM

Jeff foxworthy should be shot in the face.

**cj001f** · 12-10-2006, 11:41 PM

Originally Posted by stump832

Jeff foxworthy should be shot in the face.

I nominate Peter North

**Gripen** · 12-10-2006, 11:44 PM

Originally Posted by FreakofSnow

Or if you measure distance in beers.....4 beers to Butte from Missoula.

I was going to mention that... too bad about the new open container law. Always loved the ablity to have a beer on the way back from the mtns or river!!

**ak_powder_monkey** · 12-10-2006, 11:45 PM

seems acurate for AK too

**stump832** · 12-10-2006, 11:52 PM

Originally Posted by cj001f

I nominate Peter North

I was thinking of something more lethal.

**72Twenty** · 12-11-2006, 10:55 PM

pur'y near sums up Wyoming too, pardner.

**Peewee** · 12-12-2006, 12:43 AM

yep, i've seen several of those in "you know you're from Wyoming when.... " emails.

**Rasputin** · 12-12-2006, 03:34 AM

Originally Posted by Gripen

I was going to mention that... too bad about the new open container law. Always loved the ablity to have a beer on the way back from the mtns or river!!

Damned radical poilticians!!!