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Thread: Guaranteed way to get someone to stop by your office...

  1. #1
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    Guaranteed way to get someone to stop by your office...

    Or cubicle, in my case.

    Anyway, I find that releasing an odoriferously (got that word from a Right-Guard commercial) unpleasant fart is a sure-fire way to ensure a visit. Also, the speed with which the call is answered is directly related to smell intensity.

    I'm honestly at about a 90% "success" rate with this. I used to get sort of embarrased and even thought about saying something, but now I just like to act like nothing's wrong and watch the visitor try their hardest to do the same.
    Remind me. We'll send him a red cap and a Speedo.

  2. #2
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    Weird! You'd think that's the surest way to keep people away from your orifice!

    Try this: Fart Deodorizer

    Sprite
    "I call it reveling in natures finest element. Water in its pristine form. Straight from the heavens. We bathe in it, rejoicing in the fullest." --BZ

  3. #3
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    See ya soon, bagtag!

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by snowsprite
    Weird! You'd think that's the surest way to keep people away from your orifice!

    Try this: Fart Deodorizer

    Sprite
    Easy now. I'm not sayin' I got a problem...everybody farts. I just have an unfortunate ability to lure people to my office when I decide to.
    Remind me. We'll send him a red cap and a Speedo.

  5. #5
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    Face it bags, people just love the smell of your gas. One man's stench is another man's perfume.
    Of all the muthafuckas on earth, you the muthafuckest.

  6. #6
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    bwahahahahahahahaa!

    so im not the only one with this issue?

  7. #7
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    Talking

    Jeez bagtagley...you're luring them now!? Maybe you should bottle it and put out your own scent, like J-Lo and Britney Spears.

    I'd never buy it though because what I really want is a cubicle repellent scent.

    Sprite
    "I call it reveling in natures finest element. Water in its pristine form. Straight from the heavens. We bathe in it, rejoicing in the fullest." --BZ

  8. #8
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    Sprite. Just pick up a dead skunk alongside the road. Place it under your desk and wa la. I am very confident that nobody will be visiting your cubicle. You might even get the whole floor of the building to yourself for the day or week?
    If you had a nickel for every nickel he has, you would have a lot of fuckin' nickels!

  9. #9
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    I just discovered a solution to your problem.

    Get to work at 7am.. and fart to your heart's content until 8:30am when everyone else starts to arrive.

    ........ahhhh....

  10. #10
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    Here's a product that actually exists - which is amazing in and of itself.

    http://www.flat-d.com/chairpadblack.html

    Its a pad for your chair that absorbs fart odor! You can even take it with you.

    What'll they think of next?


  11. #11
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    "Love the gas, Meg. Love the gas!!!"

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by bagtagley
    Or cubicle, in my case.

    Anyway, I find that releasing an odoriferously (got that word from a Right-Guard commercial) unpleasant fart is a sure-fire way to ensure a visit. Also, the speed with which the call is answered is directly related to smell intensity.

    I'm honestly at about a 90% "success" rate with this. I used to get sort of embarrased and even thought about saying something, but now I just like to act like nothing's wrong and watch the visitor try their hardest to do the same.
    Bag works with a bunch of fart sniffers.
    Quando paramucho mi amore de felice carathon.
    Mundo paparazzi mi amore cicce verdi parasol.
    Questo abrigado tantamucho que canite carousel.


  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by bagtagley
    Or cubicle, in my case.

    Anyway, I find that releasing an odoriferously (got that word from a Right-Guard commercial) unpleasant fart is a sure-fire way to ensure a visit. Also, the speed with which the call is answered is directly related to smell intensity.

    I'm honestly at about a 90% "success" rate with this. I used to get sort of embarrased and even thought about saying something, but now I just like to act like nothing's wrong and watch the visitor try their hardest to do the same.
    YES! Always happens to me. It doesn't matter what is going on... I can wait on it, hold it in, whatever, but the minute I let it go, someone just has to stop by. Drives me nuts!

    The only real solution is to float a tester...

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