Big Wednesday

[Superstar Punani]

Kirkwood - Big Wednesday 3/15/2006

It all started with a text from Shoe the night before. Kirkweed remained closed yesterday, and according to Mr Cohee, 36" fell in 36 hours. I had to leave my office high-rise jail cell. Telling the boss that it was a sick day wouldn't be untrue.

Around 7:45am we were greeted by an open Spur showcasing the 3 feet of fresh that fell in the past day and a half.

The clusterfuck of a line had zero regulation, and our 5th chair turned into 20th chair as the mob pushed and shoved like a group of jailbait at the front row of a Backstreet Boys concert.

Feelings of getting robbed and general pissed-offness wore off after two turns down Oops. Face shots abound. Luckily my full-face helmet doubles as a snorkel (not to mention avoiding the dreaded goggle mark that would raise questions when you return to the office from a "sick" day.Ooops to lower oops was slayed.


After a couple of laps of powpow the top ridge to Sentinel and Pali had finally opened up. Our pack swarmed and overtook 'troller Kevin, who gladly let us pass and save him the trouble of cutting the high T (props to StoneyWall).

Pali pow was slayed, as can be seen in Slim's pics. We picked up a hot rippin skier chick, Megan, who joined the sausagefest krew. She rips.

By the time we came around, 10 was rolling and loading. A beeline was made. Skiin' Ian (who DOES NOT poach the Cirque) meets up with us. He, Ty and Kush probe the Hospital Air LZ like a bunch of proctologists.

Slim, Brooks and I check out Heart Chute. Brooks and I are Heart chute virgins with our cherries ripe for the picking. Slim happily shows us the ropes. He dropps in to some windbuff "A little firm but windbiffed!", he yells, and launches heart chute. *CRUNCH!!!!*


Brooks drops in and launches too. *CRUNCH!!!*

I peer down and didn't get a visual of the two guys. That, along with the "Crunch" sound caused my sphincter to tighten and back out immediately. My handle should now be replaced with "Big Hairy Pussy".

I went over to the adjacent chute and launched the windlip into a soft landing. Slim and Brooks were at the bottom of heart, a little shaken by the hard landing of 4 inches over firmpack. Mad Props, nonetheless.

We skied a lot more pow back to 10 and went up. As we reached the top we saw the familiar orange jacket walking around the launch pad. The AKA-Brooks exchange went something like:
"Oh fuck! Do you think he's gonna do it?"
"I'll bet you five bucks he's gonna do it!", AKA says nervously.
"Uhhh. I don't have five bucks"
"Ok I'm goin' over Eagle. See you guys in a bit"
AKA decides to go skiing. I heard later that he "didn't want to have to call his mom to tell her that Kush broke his neck" or something like that.

The three stooges, I mean, stuntmen, are taking a good long look at one of the craziest in-bounds shit I've ever seen in any lower-48 ski resort. I knew they were gonna do it. There was a strange vibe in the air that signified that the stars were aligned, and this once-in-a-decade line was about to get pwned.

Kush launches. Immediately the entire valley erupts like a stadium. Cheers and hoots filled the air. He skis out of it. The words "Holy Fucking Shit" would be a gross understatement.

Shoe was next. "Let's Do This!" he mutters to no one in particular. Followed by another insanely sick air that had the entire valley screaming in a collective orgasm. He sticks it. (No, Shoe, we don't give a shit that your pole strap got loose. You stuck it and you know it, so quit your bitching! )

Skiin' Ian would complete the trifecta. Same huge fucking air, lands deeeeep, and for a few seconds we just see his hands waving underneath at the bottom of the hot tub. The crowd scrambles up and I prepare to hit Once to dig him up. Luckily, a few seconds later his head is up and he's digging himself out.

The rest of the day was spent doing a lap on the backside and hitting Big Trees / Dogleg area, and then a few more on Palisades/Ooops area. Beer-Thirty rolls around at 2:15 for these adrenaline-overloaded guys, who were probably bored out of their skulls after THAT air. Slim and I milk Palisades for two laps of soft fluffy untracked, turning into heavy mank at the lower areas.

Unfortunately, one of the most fun days ever eventually came to an end. Another day to be filed in your brain's "Most Memorable Ski Days" section.

(Full pics to be uploaded when I get around to it)

[Oldtimer]

I wish I was there. Kind of feels like a missed a historic event. Sickity sick.

[powder11]

My handle should now be replaced with "Big Hairy Pussy"

thats funny. after looking at your pics of those guys hucking hospital air, I think Im going to do the same.

[Superstar Punani]

I wish I was there. Kind of feels like a missed a historic event. Sickity sick.

The vibe reminded me of the section in Walls of Freedom when you slayed Schmidiots for the first time in years!

[runethechamp]

The vibe reminded me of the section in Walls of Freedom when you slayed Schmidiots for the first time in years!

Wasn't that about 10 years as well?

Great write-up. Historic.

[iceman]

I wish I was there. Kind of feels like a missed a historic event.

Or like Christmas, when you were a kid, and it would be better if the night just didn't happen....[/immersion]

[MacDaddy]

Hey Supu is this "Brooks" character you speak of spend any time in SLC (sandy) in 2000-2002?

nice report

[slim]

Hey Supu is this "Brooks" character you speak of spend any time in SLC (sandy) in 2000-2002?

nice report

I doubt it. He's part of the Lehigh Valley crew brought west with the Brothers Kush.

[kush1]

Hey Supu is this "Brooks" character you speak of spend any time in SLC (sandy) in 2000-2002?

nice report

Nope, at that time he was in Pa finishing high school and starting college along with me.........

[Brooks]

Not me MacDaddy I've only been in SLC once

that was a pit stop on the drive to Tahoe to ski at Snowbasin with Meatdrink and crew

[MacDaddy]

cool cool thanks for the reply

Just thought you might be the (other) Brooks who worked at Evo ski outfitters in Sandy.

[kush1]

Hey Pu thanks for emailing the pics, I just put together the seq.........

[Ubersheist]

Hey Pu thanks for emailing the pics, I just put together the seq.........

POST THAT SHIT UP!!!!

Sounds like a wicked, wicked day!