Need excuses stat

[iceman]

So I got another pair of bros, soft ones this time (they're supposed to be blems but I can't tell what's wrong with them).

And a good friend of the family, an Austrian guy who was kind enough to put us up at both his Vienna home and his Salzburg farm when we were there, is having a big birthday.

Well this guy is a big skier and we've been trying to get him to come out to utah with us, and he also has bucks and we couldn't think of what to get him.

Well the bros came and it all seemed to make sense, I'd give up the skis, he'd be reppin' a cool USA product in Austria, and he'd have to come ski with us and bring the bros, and besides I already have a pair.

But then...just now...I opened the package. They are beautiful and I want them. No way do I want to send these babies to some frickin' schmoe across the pond. Besides, he's rich, he can buy his own damn skis, am I right?

But my wife thinks we're sending them. In fact it was her bugging me to open the package to see what the blem problem was before we shipped them that got me to open the package in the first place.

I want to keep these guys but I need something to tell her. Help a brother out?

[Zeedashbo]

tell your wife the juggernaut got to them and now the blem is supremely blem'd.

[Viva]

Throw a red herring by reminding her that it's steak and BJ day.

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[soul_skier]

tell her somthing about the bros being too much/too little ski for him, whichever your wife will believe. Then send him some wine and call it good enough

[Steven S. Dallas]

Tell your wife that the key to the Bro's performance is their top-secret core material- pure Brazilian cocaine- and that mailing them could result in your arrest and subsequent incarceration in federal pound-you-in-the-ass prison. Then you won't even have to make something up.

[gonzo]

tell her you asked splat what the defect actually is. he told you that it is internal - the core is bad - and that they will fall apart while being skiied at any moment. you can't send your loaded buddy two pieces of shit that will blow up can you?

[seatosky]

If you don't keep the bros you obviously hate freedom.

[Schmear]

Take a file to the topsheet. Then the skis really will be too blem'd to send.

[Danno]

send him some hestra gloves instead, they're dexterous as fuck.

[Owens Never Sleeps]

Tell her that Hitler was Austrian and you think this guy might be related.

[assgasorgrass]

tell her the shipping costs are too great because the shippers will consider it oversized and ding you hard. Throw in some import\export taxes, VAT jibberish and you should be in.

[slim]

Tell her that Hitler was Austrian and you think this guy might be related.

I vote for this one.

[DBdude]

The skis are too stiff or too soft for such a hard core Euro ski ripper and he will never use them, while you on the other hand will use them all the time and they will become a family heirloom to pass on.

[DBdude]

nice sig owens. that makes me laugh. I feel like that all the time.

[scarlet begonias]

Can't you send him the used Bro's? Tell him the top sheet is really fuct on the new ones and you want him to have a pair, so you are willing to send the old one's (which are still in good shape???).

Or tell him to fuck off there your ski's, he want's a pair go buy them. And then remind the wife it's Steak and BJ day, pay up or you keep the skis.

[Buzzworthy]

YOUneed excuses???


You could tell her the truth.


















Notice I said COULD.

[DerJaeger]

tell her the shipping costs are too great because the shippers will consider it oversized and ding you hard. Throw in some import\export taxes, VAT jibberish and you should be in.

In all seriousness, this is probably true. He might even have to pay duty on them, and having pay duty on your own present would definitely take the gloss off it.

Is there some other stuff that's not commonly available in Europe that you could send him that would be cheaper to ship? Perhaps some Arc'Teryx or Black Diamond gear?

[DJSapp]

Show her the skis, and remind her that you are sending him the blems. These skis are obviously not blems. When the blems arrive, you will forward them to Europe.

edit: on second thought, tell her that you're holding the skis hostage until he comes out to UT to ski with you guys. He can pick them up then (thus saving on tax, duty, VAT, etc.)

[Woodsy]

tell N you spent the money you had to ship them on a train ticket for me tocome down.
you know she willl be so excited to see me and for meto hang out wiith ice boy that she will totlally forget about it.

ok nevermind

[Red Baron]

just leave 'em here in Utah, you're here more than I am.

[truth]

The dog ate your homework.

[cj001f]

It's not you, it's me

[jayfrizzo]

Just give him the skis you greedy old bastard. He hooked you up and you'd be spreading PM Gear love across the world.

[iceman]

Wait, there's cocaine inside them?

The truth? C'mon Buzz, you can do better than that.

Dude may be related to Hitler for all I know, I do know his Dad was in the German army in WWII and did time in a Russian slave labor camp.

Oh and she would be excited to see you Woodsy, but most likely not enough to pay for your train ticket. But you never know.

[Karl Stall]

Ice - Is he married? If so, it would be inappropriate to send a gift juft for him and not his wife/family. Also, in general, you could just play the "a pair of skis is not really a classy/gracious gift" and "$500 is a bit of an innapropriate amount to spend for a birthday present".

Hopefully, he is married. In which case, I stand by my first suggestion.