9 Things I Hate About Everyone

KQ · 01-27-2006, 01:17 PM

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

**Viva** · 01-27-2006, 01:21 PM

Whistler must have sucked.

**irul&ublo** · 01-27-2006, 01:27 PM

Batteries died.

**Odin** · 01-27-2006, 01:32 PM

You know what pisses me off. Sitting in the goddamn -40 weather with a -10 wind chill on top of that not being able to work because of a fuck up that I had nothing to do with.

BASTARDS!

**MrClean** · 01-27-2006, 01:45 PM

West coast drivers... they suck

**Tippster** · 01-27-2006, 01:55 PM

Originally Posted by Odin

You know what pisses me off. Sitting in the goddamn -40 weather with a -10 wind chill on top of that ...

A warming breeze?

So KQ: Dennis Leary or George Carlin?

KQ · 01-27-2006, 02:22 PM

Originally Posted by Tippster

So KQ: Dennis Leary or George Carlin?

Not sure - it was sent to me in an email. Good thing too - I was in the mother of all bad moods this morning and it made me laugh.

**mrryde** · 01-27-2006, 02:39 PM

Originally Posted by Tippster

A warming breeze?

So KQ: Dennis Leary or George Carlin?

I think it GC

**shmerham** · 01-27-2006, 03:10 PM

A lot of stuff that shows up in emails gets credited to George Carlin and most of it isn't his stuff. Most of it isn't even funny.

Most of that posted material was genuinely funny, especially the first one. Still, I'd bet on it not being George Carlin.

**SkiingBear** · 01-27-2006, 03:11 PM

Originally Posted by Tippster

A warming breeze?

So KQ: Dennis Leary or George Carlin?

That's got Carlin written all over it.

**Bodhi** · 01-27-2006, 03:16 PM

Originally Posted by irul&ublo

Batteries died.

ROTFLMFAO!

peace,
D.

**MOHSHSIHd** · 01-27-2006, 04:20 PM

Great post....made me laugh for sure...

**splat** · 01-27-2006, 07:06 PM

Originally Posted by KQ

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

You gotta be kiddin me, KQ. That's a classic way to get someone to shut up long enough to get an edge in wordwise.

Now, why have you been hearing it so much?

**The AD** · 01-28-2006, 12:09 PM

Originally Posted by KQ

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!

Corollary to this one. Ever heard "most ski injuries occur on your last run of the day." Ah, yeah, no duh...

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

It always bugged me in college when someone would raise their hand, then when the prof acknowledged them they'd say "Question. Blah blah blah." Yes, obviously you had a question or else you wouldn't have raised your hand! I think the professors should reply with "Answer."

**fez** · 01-28-2006, 12:23 PM

"are you still working on that?"
from servers in restaurants.
i always want to say, "no, im still enjoying my meal. you are still working."

**PacRimRider1** · 01-29-2006, 10:47 AM

The "having your cake and eating it two" saying means you can't look at your cake on your table or whatever and simultaneously eat it. You have to pick one. I think it's legit.

**edg** · 01-29-2006, 10:56 AM

10. Stupid fucking pedants who create lists of their irritations. Do I look like I give a shit, knob jockey?

edg

**irul&ublo** · 01-29-2006, 11:03 AM

Originally Posted by edg

10. Stupid fucking pedants who create lists of their irritations. Do I look like I give a shit, knob jockey?

edg

Minus 5 points for improper use of the word "pedant". A pedant is one who focuses on minuate in an excessively arrogant or intellectual manner.

By statute, lawyers do not qualify. Everything we say is important.

**edg** · 01-29-2006, 11:43 AM

Originally Posted by irul&ublo

Minus 5 points for improper use of the word "pedant". A pedant is one who focuses on minuate in an excessively arrogant or intellectual manner.

By statute, lawyers do not qualify. Everything we say is important.

You wouldn't say that the focus was on unimportant aspects of human interaction in an arrogant and self-important manner? 'Spose it's all about the intepretation...

-5 for improper spelling of minute

edg

**GrabAss** · 01-29-2006, 02:54 PM

that pretty much sums up everything. thanks. haven't been able to leave my bed for 3 days and wow that gave me a laugh, thanks.

**The AD** · 01-29-2006, 04:06 PM

Originally Posted by edg

-5 for improper spelling of minute

I think he was going for "minutia."

**Mcwop** · 01-29-2006, 04:15 PM

Originally Posted by The AD

I think he was going for "minutia."

Why are you not out skiing?

**The AD** · 01-29-2006, 04:23 PM

Because I suck

Seriously, I'm leaving for Aspen this week. It's a pretty expensive trip and I don't feel like I should be dropping a whole lot more on lift tickets and gas this weekend. Too many other chores to finish before the trip, too.

Yes, I know. All weak excuses!

**Mcwop** · 01-29-2006, 04:39 PM

Originally Posted by The AD

Because I suck

Seriously, I'm leaving for Aspen this week. It's a pretty expensive trip and I don't feel like I should be dropping a whole lot more on lift tickets and gas this weekend. Too many other chores to finish before the trip, too.

Yes, I know. All weak excuses!

Forgot about Aspen - Have fun.

KQ · 01-29-2006, 05:33 PM

My Gawd - when did this place get so damn literal?

I didn't write this - as I mentioned in an earlier response to this thread I said it was sent to me in an email - I was simply passing it along (or perhaps you might say "posting it along") because I thought it was vaguely amusing.

The "having your cake and eating it two" saying means you can't look at your cake on your table or whatever and simultaneously eat it. You have to pick one. I think it's legit.

WTF - Yeah ppl know what "have your cake and eat it too" means. WFT - does it make you feel like a brainiac to tell us? Well guess what - it's meant to be a joke.