I'm going to be a pirate! Avast and ARG!

[Twoplanker]

This post serves no purpose other than for me to whine about my misfortune and troll for a bit of medical advice.

A big chunk of my season just got killed. I've got pretty severe ulnar neuropathy (nerve damage) in one hand. I already had an ulnar transposition at the elbow (they moved my funny-bone nerve to my inner elbow), but it didn't solve my problem. Now I need surgery to relieve pressure in my carpal tunnel and Guyon's canal, which will take me out of the game for a month while I heal. I could probably ski a week or so post-surgery and recover just fine, but at this point I'm risking losing effective use of my hand forever.

My damage has been ongoing for so long that a full recovery is probably unlikely, as far as I can gather. Nerves just don't grow back. The muscles in my hand are very wasted now and, if this surgery reveals that the damage is not repairable, the muscles will continue to waste until I'm looking like Bob Dole.



Mr. Dole's hand wasting is the result of a war injury, I think, but my result will probably be the same.

Don't kid yourself though, I can still take your ass out with a mean right cross if you fuck with me.

A couple of questions maybe you guys can help with:

1) Any docs out there want to comment on nerves? Is there any thing I can do (diet, etc.) that might help to increase my chances of recovering from this nerve damage? How about skiing post-surgery- I KNOW the answer is to follow doc's advice and heal for a month before skiing,

but deeep pow is likely to make we want to get back sooner than a month.

2) Not trying to be pessimistic, just realistic... I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to ski for the rest of my life with a useless hand. I wonder if I just jam a pole grip in there, like Bob Dole's pencil, maybe I'll be able to swing and plant. I'll fucking ski without poles (and make it look stylie!) if I have to. Does anyone know any one-handed skiers? How do they do it? Maybe I can single-handedly (pun intended) bring back the "one big wooden-stick" skiing style like Jim Conway did in the 80s?

- ARRRRRGGG!

[bigtrubs]

duct tape!!!

[AKPogue]

Do you think they would let you through security in the airport with a hook as a hand?

[Tippster]

You'll also be able to hold a pen like a motherfucker.

Seriously tho: good luck. Nerve damage scares the crap outta me.

[Wobbly Pirate]

You'll never get stuck in a tram.

[bklyn]

The bright side is... you can always shill for erectile dysfunction aids when you get older. They'll need to replace Dole. The residuals (payments) for your commercial will make you rich!

[irul&ublo]

Two Planker:

I have two things to say: First, hang in there and keep a positive attitude. No doubt much maggot karma is being cashed in at this very moment in your support.

The second thing is:













ARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHH

[rideit]

Take solace in the touch of His Noodley Appendage. Hail Pastafari, midget!

[flatNshallow]

Well... if holding your pole is a problem... (pausing to appreciate the opportunities that phrase provides)... you could always take up riding!

Seriously - hope it works out for you... but I see disabled skiers (partial paralysis, blind, etc) everytime I hit the slopes.... sounds to me like you a seriously commited to skiing... I am sure you will figure something out and I'll salute your dedication and creativity in advance! (not to mention sending positive vibes in hopes you don't need to!)

[freshie247]

There was a long time local at A-Basin named Wade that lost the use of an arm when he hit a tree OB west of the Rockpile in a place aptly named "The Toilet Bowl".

He strapped it to his body & still ripped everywhere.

Stem cell research will eventually allow one to regenerate nerve tissue.That's probably a while away,so my advice is to seek out the best accupuncturist you can find , get after your nerve damage big time ,& chill Winston until the docs say it's cool for school.

[Nohillsnearby]

Saw a Ski Patroller at Swiss Valley with his arm in a sling, he seemed to do ok. Also, I skied poleless and it was weird, but not too bad. Granted, there's a lot more vert where you are. Good vibes that it works out for you and you find a satisfactory solution.

[ill-advised strategy]

yarrrrrrr

[Lynx]

i had this friend growing up. her dad always walked with a limp. He was active in the boyscouts with our brothers, they went hiking, camping, backpacking, rafting, etc. I've known the family since i was born so when i was young i just thought it was a limp. he never seemed disabled or handicapped to me, just had a limp. I think i was in my teens when i found out that he had no use of the whole left side of his body! I was kind of shocked. I never realized. The dude just kept on keepin on and didn't let it get in his way. pretty goddamn awesome if you ask me!


today's message brought to you by the letters H, O, P, and E

[Buzzworthy]

Man, that sucks. I know you have been struggling with this for a while.

I do hope you find an answer. Let me know if I can help carry shit when we go to the mountain.




On the bright side, I have a snowboard you can use. No poles in hand required.

[PNWbrit]

That sucks.


You're going to have to be very careful when scratching your balls.

[El Chupacabra]

I had carpal tunnel release surgery (endoscopic) done on my right wrist in October. Took about 4-5 weeks to feel back to close to normal, and another 2 or so to feel fully OK. I had textbook carpal tunnel impingement symptoms -- numbness across the palm side of the thumb through 1/2 of the ring finger, pinky and pinky-side of the ring finger were fine. I'd wake up at nights due to pain & numbness. There were times when I couldn't make a fist due to swelling.

I tried 3 cortisone-type injections in the wrist before giving up and going with the surgery. The injections only relieved the symptom for 1-3 months before they would come back. The risk of not doing anything about it is that you can permanently damage the nerves -- i.e., they may never come back fully, and you can lose sensation. As I type this, roughly 3.5 months out from surgery, I can still feel that the inner side of the ring finger has lessened sensation, but it's only really noticeable if I stop and think about it.

Best of luck with this -- don't put it off if it's as bad as you make it sound (sounds worse than mine was when I had the surgery done). And make sure you do all the exercises they tell you to do, so recovery goes smoothly.

[LaramieSkiBum]

doesn't dole take viagra for that shit?

[iceman]

I have fucked-up nerves in both elbows and have had them for over 25 years. Apparently my ulnar nerves are in the wrong place, the docs said they got pushed out of place by muscle from lifting while playing high school football. I was a pretty big boy.

Ever since then I can't really lift. I can't do anything that involves heavy stress on the elbow while it's bending, like pushups or curls or bench presses. I'm still naturally strong enough to move plenty of weight but if I do any amount of reps I'll lose feeling in my hands for a period of days to weeks. Usually it's just the little fingers and ring fingers, sometimes it's worse. I also have a certain degree of numbness in my hands at all times. It is also aggravated by direct pressure such as sitting in a chair with my elbows on the armrests for long periods. Doing things that put stress on the elbow through the shoulder muscles like poling on flats doesn't bother my elbows at all because the elbows aren't bending

I just work around it. With rest I recover sensation and I still have good strength and mobility in both hands. As you all have noticed, I'm still able to type. It has been somewhat progressive, but at a glacial pace.

I'm sure my case is far different than yours but don't give up hope, and in particular try to avoid doing the things that make your hands feel worse. They say nerve cells can't regenerate, but I have been in situations (usually because of testosterone overload, like arm wrestling in bars, where I generally win and then can barely feel my hands for a few weeks) where I can barely hold a pen, but so far it has always come back to a near-normal level in time.

Good luck with it, and support candidates who support stem-cell research in the meantime.

[The AD]

It's a real pisser the name "tonghands" is already taken here.

In all serious, though, good luck and stay positive!

[iceman]

It's a real pisser the name "tonghands" is already taken here.

Hey, "Capt. Hook" is still available.

[taoslcl]

There's an instructor at Taos with a hook that rips all over the mountain. He doesn't use poles. I've skied with him a couple of times and he can do just about anything on skis and looks good doing it.

[Bum Z]

There's a Snowbird local that uses one pole. I think he tele's as well, but I'm not sure. I've seen him ski many times - he rips.

[flatNshallow]

while on that thread - skiing Boyne Mtn (MI) last year a buddy tells me a friend of his is joining us... one leg amputated above the knee... no matter - this dude shredded the living hell out of that "mountain"... easily one of the top 4 or 5 guys out that day... for the rest of the weekend I heard lift line chatter: "did you see that guy....?" Bumps, steeps, trees - he skied it all and with serious steeze...
conclusion: anything is possible.

[shera]

There was a long time local at A-Basin named Wade that lost the use of an arm when he hit a tree OB west of the Rockpile in a place aptly named "The Toilet Bowl".

I've been skiing that way this year...

And I've known several people that ripped without poles. Don't sweat the skiing - I think you'll be fine with that.