Quotes from the Chairlift: 05-06 Edition

[telepow]

On a quad at Copper a buddy and two random folks, a guy and girl, see a teenage snowboarder take off his board and do the walk of shame down under the lift. Being jittery, he drops his board and it goes careening down the groomer about 500 ft until it takes out some poor little girl on skis. All four of us without hesitation booed loudly until we were out of sight.

[samthaman]

last winter, over christmas/new years, i was out at the canyons with soul_skier and a bunch of other people. I was riding up the gondola from the base (not the parking lot one, the next one) and managed to get seperated from the group and put in with a family from, if i remember correctly chicago. the two rug rats are bitching constantly and the mom dosn't look that excited to have been draged out of the spa so the dad makes some comment about "do you know how much we're spending on this, and you dont even want to go skiing?"

at which point i decide to chime in and enquire just how much he was spending:
"If you dont mind me asking, how much is this costing you?"
"the hotel alone was 950 last night (they were clearly staying in the new fancy place)" - guy
"oh really? my whole vacation is going to cost less than that"
"What!"
"Yeah, i'm out here for two weeks, i got a season pass and a new pair of skis(mag prices), and even with that included it'll be about 900 for two weeks"

He became furious at this point and glared at me for most of the rest of the ride. not the funniest thing ever but the guys reaction was priceless.

[mc_roon]

this is from a thread of mine earlier in the year:

On a more hilarious note, we had a very interesting incident with a vacationer at the bottom of Tombstone Lift. It was about 3:45 and we were heading in for the day from 9990, so we took that long groomer to the bottom of tombstone. My friend Ian is on a snowboard and there are flat sections so he was keeping his speed up while staying completly in control. As we get in line to ride up a middle-aged man wearing a grey steet-tech one piece flys up completly out of control and after coming to a stop and falling over takes off his skis and makes a beeline to Ian. He takes off his helmet, and his gloves and here is an exact transcript of the conversation that went down?

<Guy> "Do you think this is funny?"
<Ian> "sorry what?"
<Guy> "I asked you if you think this is fucking funny? You could have killed my family!"
<Ian> "I have no idea what your talking about"
<Guy> "You came within 10 feet of my family back there, what if they had turned?"
<Ian> "You would have been a moron" (starts to skate towards the lift)
<Guy> "This isnt fucking funny, I'm going to teach you a lesson! Guys(calling to his friends), I need some help with this joker"
<Me> "Whatever dude, lets go"
<Guy> "Who the fuck are you? Do you know this guy? Get the fuck out of here!"
<Ian> "Let me get this straight. Your calling for your friends to help 'teach me a lesson' and you dont want my friend around?"
<Guy> "Yeah you queer, were going to show you what happens when you threaten a mans family"
<Ian> "Your a tool"
<Guy> "Im going to fuck you up"(motions to his friends again)
<Liftie> "Sir, your going to have to calm down. You two can go"
<Guy> "Who the fuck do you think you are? Without me your bumfuck state would be nothing!"
<Me> as we start to leave, "You wouldnt happen to be from texas, would you?"
<Guy> "Born and raised and damn proud of it. You fucks wouldnt last a week there.

[AKA]

I get alot of them on my carving board:
"dude, you broke the tail off your board"
"how can you ride with your feet turned that way"
"are those ski boots on your snowboard"
and the classic - 5 times in one day at Bachelor last month...
"How do you like your Monoski?"

I think all of those comments make sense, I mean you are a fucking carving board for christs-sake.

[pappag]

This is even better than www.overheardinnewyork.com

[AKA]

Years ago on closing day at Ski Roundtop I was standing in line to get my ticket when the woman in front of me asks:

woman:"So what are the conditions like today, you got any fresh powder?"

guy selling tickets:" um, what?"


woman: "you know, any good powder, I like powder."


guy selling tickets:"No, its 70degrees and its April."


woman: "Oh well, I was hoping for some powder but I guess Ill ski anyway."

[Roo]

There's a great cliff band in Alpe d'Huez that has the Lievre Blanc chair run up the face of it. Several times we've been skiing down the hanging pow field above it and heard screams and shouts coming from people on the lift. I think the best comment was from one guy urging us to save ourselves.

[skibum193]

so not from the chairlift, but an astounding experience. this girl asks me to have dinner with her, pretty stoked, said she skied, was from CO (im in boulder) and was pretty cute. at dinner, she proclaims she prefers moguls over powder because it's too much work... just about shit myself, haha

[JohnTucker]

Chica: "Holy shit! I think that's my bra?"

Dood: "WTF, is it doing up there?"

"Uhhhh, I don't know. ....Foget it. ...must be someone elses."

[Mudfoot]

Chair lift at Purgatory several years back, on they first ride up one Texas touron says to the other "How do you turn these ski brakes on?"

[pappag]

so not from the chairlift, but an astounding experience. this girl asks me to have dinner with her, pretty stoked, said she skied, was from CO (im in boulder) and was pretty cute. at dinner, she proclaims she prefers moguls over powder because it's too much work... just about shit myself, haha

Der pooper??

[The word Gaper is overused]

Everyone has heard this, but it is funny and pisses me off everytime.

On the lift the guy sitting next to you says, "Powder skis, huh? Gonna need those today, right."

Just wanna say something like,"Well I don't need them, in fact I'm so goddamn good that I could be skiing with a 2x4 duct taped to each foot, but I thought that too many people would ask me what I'm doing."