Why don't the British build computers?
They couldn't find a way to make them leak oil
Did you know Lucas Electrics made a vacuum cleaner? It was the only product they made that didn't suck
What do you call an MG with a dual exhaust?
A wheelbarrow
Did you hear about the guy whose Land Rover didn't leak oil?
The factory took it back and worked on it until it did
Alexander Graham Bell invented the Telephone. Thomas Edison invented the Light Bulb. Joseph Lucas invented the Short Circuit.
The three positions of a Lucas switch: dim, flicker, and off
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