Tof Henry :-(

[Buster Highmen]

[CHAIR_97]

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[powdork]

i'm not sure we can establish that ....

rest in peace Tof Henry

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Exactly

[powdork]

It depends on the age of the child and whether those conversations carry through with the spouse and other remaining family members I think. Everyone has their own interpretation of how to live their life on their terms. Good for you for living life your way, but it’s not a cookie cutter template that everyone needs to abide by.

My kids know that I feel lucky just to be a zygote that made it and we’ve had conversations about risk in the mountains since they were young. Life is finite, there’s no changing that.

It depends upon a lot of things. But anyone that imposes their beliefs into any other peoples relationships is making judgements they have no right to make. Just assuming someone's right to have a father is greater than father's right to live his life is placing your value system into their relationship. Fathers die all the time for a lot worse reasons, or for no reason at all. Pretty much everyone will have to endure their father leaving or dying during their lifetime, and if you don't, well that's a worse outcome isn't it.

[subtle plague]

What exactly do you all consider an acceptable level of risk for yourselves? 1 in a 100? 1 in a 1,000? 1 in 10,000? And what do you consider acceptable for others?.

Well. I did not want to go there and you we'rent referring to me but since you've come up with it.

The reduction Method gets you to 1:100.000 in the Backcountry. Which is less than certain cancer risks.
And you can increase your risk going from there. Which I have sometimes.

The point is: I'm not telling anyone to stay safe and not take great risks. I'm just saying that if your trademark is the Chamonix style of taking risks the outcome is not very surprising.

People idolizing him on social media and lamenting his "unforseeable death" at the same time obviously have never been in the mountains or suffer from massive cognitive dissonance. I couldn't watch his and other Videos of that kind anymore because I knew his luck could run out sooner or later and I wanted no part in it.

[Core Shot]

Never heard of him.

Someone needs to post the best stoke videos of him. Get this thread back on track.

[frorider]

Subtle, I agree with your point about how the ‘unforeseeable death’ comments on social media indicate lack of knowledge or cognitive dissonance. But would you agree that this tgr thread avoids that cliche at least?

I’ve followed Tof for a while, he’s certainly well known. I guess I’m partly watching to see how people like him are attempting to mitigate risk in situations where I can’t see a way to mitigate it to a level I’m comfortable with.

I agree with Powdork that none of us know what personal conversations or agreements have happened between extreme athlete Xxxx and their spouse or family. Since kids aren’t in a position to negotiate in the way a spouse can, that obviously rubs many of us the wrong way.

[californiagrown]

Never heard of him.

Someone needs to post the best stoke videos of him. Get this thread back on track.

As gnarly as they come. Skiing insane closeout chamonix lines in fresh snow conditions at mach chicken was his versions of "good style".

[3PinGrin]

It depends upon a lot of things. But anyone that imposes their beliefs into any other peoples relationships is making judgements they have no right to make. Just assuming someone's right to have a father is greater than father's right to live his life is placing your value system into their relationship. Fathers die all the time for a lot worse reasons, or for no reason at all. Pretty much everyone will have to endure their father leaving or dying during their lifetime, and if you don't, well that's a worse outcome isn't it.

I agree.

[singlecross]

As gnarly as they come. Skiing insane closeout chamonix lines in fresh snow conditions at mach chicken was his versions of "good style".

Thanks for posting that.

[MagnificentUnicorn]

It’s like we’ve never had this conversation before


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[Core Shot]

As gnarly as they come. Skiing insane closeout chamonix lines in fresh snow conditions at mach chicken was his versions of "good style".

Cham wow

Amazing skier. But also a good flick. RIP

[yeahman]

It’s like we’ve never had this conversation before


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For sure, but it is interesting to compare the online reaction to Hilaree Nelson's death. She had two kids at home but I didn't see a lot of criticism. More like adoration at how she was able to have a family and be an extreme skier.

A lot of people have always sort of put Alex Lowe on a pedestal too, but he left behind a couple young kids. Of course that was before social media.

[TahoeJ]

For sure, but it is interesting to compare the online reaction to Hilaree Nelson's death. She had two kids at home but I didn't see a lot of criticism. More like adoration at how she was able to have a family and be an extreme skier.

I think the distinction is she was (or appeared to be) always very calculated. Whereas with Tof some of his decisions were just plain reckless. He was definitely near the top of the list of pro skiers you wouldn't be surprised to hear something unfortunate happened. Not judging, it's just the truth.

[Foggy_Goggles]

Actually, by making the distinction you are judging. And that OK. But realize that we are, by definitional, overlaying our value systems on someone else. I happen to agree with you regarding risk, families, kids, recklessness and so on but I try to stop short of passing judgement because they could be playing with a different set of cards.

[subtle plague]

Subtle, I agree with your point about how the ‘unforeseeable death’ comments on social media indicate lack of knowledge or cognitive dissonance. But would you agree that this tgr thread avoids that cliche at leasty.

Most definitely. That's why im here and not on instagram. As I've said further upthread. That's one of the qualities of tgr. People are usually nuanced.....unless its the bitcoin thread [emoji6] .

[Spooky]

I think the distinction is she was (or appeared to be) always very calculated. Whereas with Tof some of his decisions were just plain reckless. He was definitely near the top of the list of pro skiers you wouldn't be surprised to hear something unfortunate happened. Not judging, it's just the truth.

Ostensibly true, but when you understand the realities of the high altitude environments in which she pursued her main objectives, was she actually engaging is less risky/reckless behaviour? I'm not so sure. The additional objective hazards on those 8000+M peaks are so pronounced, with altitude and weather systems alone removing your safety margins so significantly, that going after such ski descents on those peaks is so inherently dangerous that I sadly was no more surprised at her demise than Tof's. RIP to both - I have huge admiration for both even though their pursuits raise difficult questions about risk.

[ghosthop]

It depends upon a lot of things. But anyone that imposes their beliefs into any other peoples relationships is making judgements they have no right to make. Just assuming someone's right to have a father is greater than father's right to live his life is placing your value system into their relationship. Fathers die all the time for a lot worse reasons, or for no reason at all. Pretty much everyone will have to endure their father leaving or dying during their lifetime, and if you don't, well that's a worse outcome isn't it.

The relativism and whataboutism in this post don't logic. It is unfair to expect a grieving child to rationalize the decisions of adults. Do you support the right of parents to use IV drugs while they have children at home? We all make selfish decisions as parents.

I hope that Tof's son is able to come to terms with his father's loss in a healthy way. I long ago chose not to view Tof's content because I could never agree with the level of risk for a parent, no matter what private conversations and decisions were made with his son's mother.

https://www.powder.com/stories/tof-henry-profile

[3PinGrin]

The relativism and whataboutism in this post don't logic. It is unfair to expect a grieving child to rationalize the decisions of adults. Do you support the right of parents to use IV drugs while they have children at home? We all make selfish decisions as parents.

I hope that Tof's son is able to come to terms with his father's loss in a healthy way. I long ago chose not to view Tof's content because I could never agree with the level of risk for a parent, no matter what private conversations and decisions were made with his son's mother.

https://www.powder.com/stories/tof-henry-profile

Lots of parents don’t take these types of risks and are still really shitty parents. Enforcing one’s choice of parental choices/approach on others is a losing proposition imo.

[Core Shot]

Paging the ghost of Shane Mckonkey.
He was a dad. Kept doing what he loved until he didn’t.

Chill people. And appreciate his love of extreme skiing. RIP.

[bodywhomper]

RIP.

I have no answers. only personal stories.

I've never been to Chamoix, but we've all heard the stories. A friend (who has a high-ish risk tolerance) lived there for a summer, was taking a mellow/into walk near(?) the alpine from the town/village that he was living in, and witnessed several people being crushed to death from a rock fall while they were walking on a well used trail. There were many people on that trail where is traversed a steep talus slope and only a few were hurt or killed.

I remember when my high risk tolerant uncle died in a plane accident on a medical aid mission in mexico (he was a surgeon), his HS-aged daughter was crushed, his adult daughter was crushed, my parents (and I) were crushed, and his mother (my grandmother) very noticeably never got past burying her son.

I remember when a co-worker at the mountain shop died guiding on everest (he held a few records for everest at the time). he fell in a crevasse at camp two. his 4 stateside roommates were all coworkers. we closed the shop for a day or two. i think he had 9 children in nepal. it was really sad. it could be viewed for him as an occupational hazard. there were 2 other funerals attended by coworkers of people close to the shop in my few years there, one was the drowning in the merced after a base jump and the other was a drowning in the american river from a pindown while kayaking.

i've had a very close friend die from a work incident: heat stroke. i still cry thinking of him. I cherish the photos of when when he came and visited by oldest kid when he was a newborn (before we had digital cameras).

we live in a ww community in my area. there was a drowning of a kid (17yo) on a spring break trip with friends this year on the reach where the put-in in 15 minute drive from my house. there was another drowning of a local maybe 8 years ago in the same area (possibly same rapid), that he'd run that reach multiple times every spring, as many paddlers do in my area. that guy was a teacher at the HS, married with 2 or 3 kids. i didn't know him, but have many close friend who did. there was another relatively famous ww paddler who lived in my hood and died from smoke inhalation doing an rx burn on his property. that's an activity that i regularly do myself. he had a spouse and kids who were home at the time.

Pretty much everyone will have to endure their father leaving or dying during their lifetime, and if you don't, well that's a worse outcome isn't it.

begs the question to me, are his parents burying him along with his spouse and kids?

For sure, but it is interesting to compare the online reaction to Hilaree Nelson's death. She had two kids at home but I didn't see a lot of criticism. More like adoration at how she was able to have a family and be an extreme skier.

A lot of people have always sort of put Alex Lowe on a pedestal too, but he left behind a couple young kids. Of course that was before social media.

among my wife and peers, we were asking the questions when hilaree nelson died. There has been a media culture of being more critical of mothers with young children alpine climbing at high elevation than of fathers.

Alex Lowe's kids (as adults) made a film about their dad and what the loss meant for them.

[californiagrown]

begs the question to me, are his parents burying him along with his spouse and kids?

Reading that article from Powder that ghosthop posted upthread a few posts, it seems like he was pretty estranged from everyone in his family (including wife), and only saw his kid once or twice a week. that article is 5 years old now, so hopefully things had changed for the better.


has their been any word on what caused the accident? rockfall, avalanche, slip and fall?

[shroom]

RIP

probability is a bitch, plan for it

[Buster Highmen]

My brother was an alcoholic with a very destructive streak.

I used to get really angry with him because he wouldn't stop his self destructive behavior.

He was always wheedling me for money. I stopped giving him any when he blew off our wedding after I'd sent him $600 for airfare.

He destroyed his liver and kidneys and finally quit drinking alcohol after several failures with AA and other religion based programs, but continued to eat rich foods, like several cheesecakes a week as well as lots of refined wheat and sugar products.

After a few years on dialysis, he died.

I had never seen my dad cry before that. He blamed himself, I held onto a lot of blame for my brother and for my parents. It wasn't good; that kind of obsession just eats at you. That wore me down, I just got so tired of being angry and upset.

The heart of the matter for me was realizing that my brother was sick, he had a disease. He was primarily slightly autistic, brilliant, but couldn't feel other people. So, alcohol became his coping mechanism. Skiing had been mine for a long time before that.

It was my brothers choice to drink, but I no longer feel that anger and feel more compassion by seeing the situation through the lense of disease.

In that same vein, I see how people can hold Tof accountable, I get that. I just see it as a disease with all the sadness in that way, not holding blame for the patient.

Now I have one of my all time best friends from the halcyon daze of massive college lsd trips, killing himself with alcohol.

[cravenmorhead]

I'm not sure I agree about the distinction between Tof and Hilaree. Granted, I don't have a deep knowledge of either of them, but my general sense is that both of them were pretty eyes-wide-open about the risks they were taking. RIP