Poll: How many of you idiots think you could kill a gorilla?

[east or bust]

Thread is giving me strong vibes of this vid https://youtu.be/OA3AZ59Zk_I

Also, fucking thread drift. The question is a gorilla, not a chimp. And obviously nobody is taking a gorilla.

So maybe the question is how many humans would it take to kill a 200-lb gorilla? Bare hands no bats.

I’m saying five.

200 lb gorilla? Fuck that

Make it a silverback, and I’d say 10-15 average adult men

Probably 7-9 before social media influencers became a thing

[Brownski]

Thread is giving me strong vibes of this vid https://youtu.be/OA3AZ59Zk_I

Also, fucking thread drift. The question is a gorilla, not a chimp. And obviously nobody is taking a gorilla.

So maybe the question is how many humans would it take to kill a 200-lb gorilla? Bare hands no bats.

I’m saying five.

Maybe five NFL linemen…. five typical TGR posters would be pounded flat. I assume the strategy would be for four of them to take one limb each and the fifth guy to somehow goes after the head. I don’t think I could control one gorilla limb.

[m2711c]

not with that attitude…..

[stealurface831]

Also, fucking thread drift. The question is a gorilla, not a chimp. And obviously nobody is taking a gorilla.

So maybe the question is how many humans would it take to kill a 200-lb gorilla? Bare hands no bats.

I’m saying five.

I don’t think there is a such thing as a 200lb fully grown male gorilla.

But say we get ourselves a 200lb juvenile, I say it takes no less than 16 mags to even have a chance.



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[Brownski]

I don’t think there is a such thing as a 200lb fully grown male gorilla.

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Maybe it’s a female. You got something against females?

[stealurface831]

Maybe it’s a female. You got something against females?

Ain’t quite right to be fighting a lady gorilla.


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[Falcon3]

Ain’t quite right to be fighting a lady gorilla.
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That’s not very woke of you.

[stealurface831]

That’s not very woke of you.

Okay, I guess some mags can get their asses handed to them by a lady ape.


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[Falcon3]

Okay, I guess some mags can get their asses handed to them by a lady ape.


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I think half the mags in this place would try to win the fight by seducing one, honestly.

[JimmyCarter]

I think half the mags in this place would try to win the fight by seducing one, honestly.

[ZomblibulaX]

I don’t think there is a such thing as a 200lb fully grown male gorilla.

Nazi midget methhead gorilla?

[m2711c]

Yeah, we’re going to need some pictures of this lady gorilla before any rational fight vs fuck decision can be made.

[ötzi]

How about a wolverine?

Versus either SUF or a chimp, I'm taking the wolverine.

[Benny Profane]

Okay, I guess some mags can get their asses handed to them by a lady ape.


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Raises hand.

There was that night in Bangkok. Mind altering drugs mixed with ether.

[exsparky]

2 guys who practiced with spears could do it.
One guy stabs the neck, when the gorilla grabs the spear the other guy stabs it in the neck.


Unless the gorilla takes both spears and stabs them first.
I'm going 50-50 odds.

[m2711c]

That is indeed a cunning plan…. How immersive have you gotten with your spear training?

[MagnificentUnicorn]

I don’t think there is a such thing as a 200lb fully grown male gorilla.

But say we get ourselves a 200lb juvenile, I say it takes no less than 16 mags to even have a chance.



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So 200# juvenile gorilla, 16 mags but 130# adult male chimp and you can dispatch it by yourself? Sounds good


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[exsparky]

That is indeed a cunning plan…. How immersive have you gotten with your spear training?

I would think if you lived in a gorilla environment, spear training may be popular already.

[Brownski]

I would think if you lived in a gorilla environment, spear training may be popular already.

This raises another question. Are we talking about a cage match under controlled conditions or a theoretical encounter in the wild? Cause in the wild there’s no such thing as one on one. Your average gorilla or chimpanzee is gonna have family close at hand.

[Skidog]

That's Gil Scott Heron.

And pre-ER Anthony Edwards, apparently.

New strategy, SUF: throw Goose at the gorilla and hope the turtle can fuck up that chimp.

I think the turtles got a chance...that chimp thumb could be the game changer though

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[stealurface831]

This raises another question. Are we talking about a cage match under controlled conditions or a theoretical encounter in the wild? Cause in the wild there’s no such thing as one on one. Your average gorilla or chimpanzee is gonna have family close at hand.

We are 100% talking a cage. If someone knows anyone that has access to a wild chimp of approximately 120 pounds, I will fight it if given two months preparation and a pair of the new Commander 98s in 190.


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[MagnificentUnicorn]

We are 100% talking a cage. If someone knows anyone that has access to a wild chimp of approximately 120 pounds, I will fight it if given two months preparation and a pair of the new Commander 98s in 190.


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Move those goal posts


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[Vt-Freeheel]

A group of mags can train the chimp for 2 months so the poor thing is aware it might get sucker punched.

[stealurface831]

A group of mags can train the chimp for 2 months so the poor thing is aware it might get sucker punched.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CJkWS4t4l0k


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[Skidog]

A group of mags can train the chimp for 2 months so the poor thing is aware it might get sucker punched.

I think one "sucker punch" will be plenty to kick that sucker into kill mode. Didn't you people see planet of the apes or the story I posted of a group of chimps hunting and killing gorillas?

I like SUF, but he's delusional and I don't want to see him die.

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