Poll: How many of you idiots think you could kill a gorilla?

[stealurface831]

I think they swing their necks and hit with the skull. That's a lot of muscle and velocity.

I'm (reasonably) afraid of giraffe headbutts.

while those neck swings would be devastating if hit, i don't know that they would be able to easily swing that low.

[pfluffenmeister]

this is why i have opted for flakka instead. there are many accounts of users displaying "superhuman strength".

AKA regular chimp strength.

[jono]

while those neck swings would be devastating if hit, i don't know that they would be able to easily swing that low.

They drink from the river. I think they could manage if they saw you coming at them with a bat.

[stealurface831]

They drink from the river. I think they could manage if they saw you coming at them with a bat.

they drink by doing this:

[JayPowHound]

while those neck swings would be devastating if hit, i don't know that they would be able to easily swing that low.

Fair enough, seems with low attackers they utilize the legs. Legs that are long and strong enough to kick off a big male Lion.

Going for the neck seems to be the appropriate strategy.

[stealurface831]

Fair enough, seems with low attackers they utilize the legs. Legs that are long and strong enough to kick off a big male Lion.

Going for the neck seems to be the appropriate strategy.

i can't find any video but apparently some have decapitated lions with their kicks.

[JayPowHound]

Fixed the post with video. Seems like the only way to avoid the strong ass legs is a sneak attack at the head/upper neck with a quick takedown.

Not sure the Olympic high jump champ can get up there for the choke out, let alone us plebs.

GL

[jono]

they drink by doing this:

Dude, you're like 6 ft taller than that water. He's got all his options available. If you lay down he stomps you.

What is the plan?

[stealurface831]

Dude, you're like 6 ft taller than that water. He's got all his options available. If you lay down he stomps you.

What is the plan?

i have no plan. i am not fighting a giraffe. even with a bat.

[JimmyCarter]

Piranha and electric eels, and sharks with frickin’ lasers attached to their heads.

I’ve been waiting for a chance to recycle this:

Attachment 382219


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Has no one mentioned whelks yet?

[jono]

i have no plan. i am not fighting a giraffe. even with a bat.

Makes sense. Of all the animals mentioned I think the two hardest to engage might be the giraffe and the honey badger--cause he don't give a fuck, why bother?

[abraham]

Has no one mentioned whelks yet?

We're not trying to drown the kid. The goose might drown him though.

[JayPowHound]

I admittedly got sucked into a giraffe youtube hole.. but it delivered this:




Content is irrelevant, the announcers voice is incredible. Do you think he talks this way all day, or does he save it for work?

Is this a failed radio host?.

I wonder if he has a podcast...

[jono]

That's amazingly on point for this thread. The deadly voice over while the giraffes gently nudge each other in the neck is great, but I have to give finest moment to "Salvador Dali."

That's a channel, right?

[stealurface831]

I admittedly got sucked into a giraffe youtube hole.. but it delivered this:




Content is irrelevant, the announcers voice is incredible. Do you think he talks this way all day, or does he save it for work?

Is this a failed radio host?.

I wonder if he has a podcast...

that guy is a meme

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/numbe...lowed-to-smoke

[Skidog]

Flakka huh? I wonder if you might consider the crocodile....that shit seems spacey.

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[stealurface831]

Flakka huh? I wonder if you might consider the crocodile....that shit seems spacey.

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i would rather the chimp kill me than the drug i am taking to beat the chimp. i don't think krokodil would help me too much anyway. it acts as a sedative.

[subtle plague]

Stick with the fkakka, but don't forget to double up with meth.

[riser4]

this is why i have opted for flakka instead. there are many accounts of users displaying "superhuman strength".

Why just one?

[riser4]

Yeah neither have I.

Poser.

[TahoeJ]

Only chance to take down a giraffe is to break one of its legs... which would probably be difficult to do even if it just stood there and let you try. How many chimps would it take to beat a giraffe? How many chimps on flakka?

[subtle plague]

How many chimps on flakka?

That depends on whether SuF is allowed to train them in baseball bat fighting techniques and / or flakka use.

[stealurface831]

ow many chimps would it take to beat a giraffe? How many chimps on flakka?

i'm gonna say 20-25 non-flakka'd chimps. subtract 8 or so if given flakka.

That depends on whether SuF is allowed to train them in baseball bat fighting techniques and / or flakka use.

i don't think bats would make much difference. chimps don't have the range of motion to effectively swing a bat.

[smartyiak]

Fixed the post with video. Seems like the only way to avoid the strong ass legs is a sneak attack at the head/upper neck with a quick takedown.

Not sure the Olympic high jump champ can get up there for the choke out, let alone us plebs.

GL

If it’s the women’s champ (or pole vault gold) I’m 100% watching!


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[Core Shot]

Fucking pussys

Give me a bat and I can kneecap that giraffe

Long spindly legs. Easy target