Sobriety, V2.

[buttahflake]

Don’t fucking drink, let it go for good. She’s right.

[riser4]

Party favor covers a lot of ground. In my circles, it usually meant coke. Sounds like you're talking about California Sober in this case. At least i hope you are. There's a lot of discussion in here about trading one crutch for another. And your wife probably knows you tge best. If she thinks once a month won't work, you're probably better off listening to her.

[byates1]

And if you are really a problem drinker there will be a part of your mind just waiting each month for that day.

Free your mind of that. The whole deal is to go from wanting to drink all the time to despising the idea of drinking and truly enjoying being at peace.

[yeahman]

Maybe propose you can drink one beer a day rather than one day a month?

[John_B]

Maybe propose you can drink one beer a day rather than one day a month?

I'm no sobriety pro but have been in your wife's shoes and have watched that line of thinking catastrophically implode multiple times with a close family member vs full no booze has been successful for the last 2.5 years.

[Shorty_J]

And if you are really a problem drinker there will be a part of your mind just waiting each month for that day.

Free your mind of that. The whole deal is to go from wanting to drink all the time to despising the idea of drinking and truly enjoying being at peace.

I definitely don't want a drink all of the time... Far from it.

But I hear you.

Sent from my Pixel 8 using Tapatalk

[XXX-er]

i see guys across the bar who suck back 3 in the time i take to drink one while I read the news, one n done I tell the server and go home YMMV but

since starting the micro-dosing in late 23 I definatly drink less, I notice I drink slower and I quit smoke dope no craving for MJ at all

If you cannot drink you cannot drink

[stapes]

For me it was certainly easier to just say ‘no booze’ than play the mental gymnastics and mind games around counting drinks etc. Plus it’s easy for [emoji637] to turn into a couple…”just one more”…when the good times and social interaction gets rolling. I was always pouring “just one more”. Zero is easier.

[The Iron Horse]

Here is my take. Do with it what you will.

It never gets easier. In fact, every single day it gets a little bit harder because I am one day removed from the day I decided to quit. Back then, I KNEW why I was quitting. It was a life or death decision and I undersood that. Now that I have been sober for 17 years, I do not remember all that clearly why I stopped. Each and every day that I get farther away from that decision the line between sobriety and chaos becomes just a teensy weensy bit thinner.

I learned this early on and it saved my life because if I had been expecting it to get better, after six months or a year or whatever, I would have said screw this, it is not getting any better. It is never going to get better, so I might as well get shit faced.

I want a drink every single second of every single day, and nothing will change that. Sobriety sucks, but I keep going. Seventeen years is a long time.

[Cono Este]

Well, they sent my girl to a yr long term rehab, last chance type of place. I’ve just been doing the clean up work the last 6-9 months. Every 6-8:weeks or so. Last time she called me, she was in a 10 day bender, a box of Chardonnay per day. 150 oz. I went over, shed been on the apps, and some dude beat her up. Nice! I’ve long since detached emotionally, but I called that guy, and some others, try to get the situation under control, and then like the Calvalry,her ex ponies up for this hail marry pass.

The whole town used me. I get it. Stakes are so high, young kids.etc. But man, I’m doin the dirty work, and like that, gone for a yr. No phone, and quite honestly, I dont think this type of behavioral modification will work on her. They must have her tied down with no phone.

Anyway, you’ve all seen it, but I’m here to tell anyone who hasn’t, it’s some hardcore shit and I hope no one ever experiences this. Changed my life. I will never drink again, and havent in 3 yrs.

[TNKen]

Daughter crossed the two-year mark last week.

[fastfred]

Well, they sent my girl to a yr long term rehab, last chance type of place. I’ve just been doing the clean up work the last 6-9 months. Every 6-8:weeks or so. Last time she called me, she was in a 10 day bender, a box of Chardonnay per day. 150 oz. I went over, shed been on the apps, and some dude beat her up. Nice! I’ve long since detached emotionally, but I called that guy, and some others, try to get the situation under control, and then like the Calvalry,her ex ponies up for this hail marry pass. The whole town used me. I get it. Stakes are so high, young kids.etc. But man, I’m doin the dirty work, and like that, gone for a yr. No phone, and quite honestly, I dont think this type of behavioral modification will work on her. They must have her tied down with no phone. Anyway, you’ve all seen it, but I’m here to tell anyone who hasn’t, it’s some hardcore shit and I hope no one ever experiences this. Changed my life. I will never drink again, and havent in 3 yrs.

your an enabler alcoholics adn drug addicts love enablers

learn some boundaries let it go

[byates1]

Good news ken. Word. What fastfred said cono. Bounce my man.

[Cono Este]

They sent her to a place in texas. Seems rough, shaming, 5 minutes on the phone, just fucking insane. No way she reacts well to a yr. of that. Im supposed to hang up if she calls from a rural rd or something. Mother said she will die anyway. Anyone ever hear of burning tree?

Fucking mother has me moving her apartment into storage next week.. It’s not enabling, Ive been used by the entire town. These Midwest families are something.

I will never have a fucking drink again, no way. Learn to hate the shit. I Almost decked two super market managers stacking min bottles at the checkout . My rich vineyard owning friends can suck a dick. George Clooney too. Fucker.

I’ll be free In a week, I see no reason to stick around. If she comes back a day early. It will be more of the same. And if they reprogram her, not waiting to find out.

[Whiteroom_Guardian]

Cono if you don't want to check out a meeting at least get the Al-Anon book and skim through. It's helpful shit.

1yr no phone rehab sounds AMAZING if she will actually stay. It only gets worse dude. This thing doesn't get better on its own.

My sister is 10x felony at this point. Currently in mental facility as last ditch effort to commute a 5-10 YEAR state prison sentence. 2x felony eluding police charges in 2ish months. Already spent 20ish days in mental hospital involuntarily > released > arrested again within 5 days. Legit nightmare. Drugs and alcohol + mental illness = full shitshow. She still doesn't get it. My sister like your ex(?) cono needs all privleges taken away and even that doesn't work sometimes.

Some are just incapable of humility/responsibilty/self-reflection and may never ever get this deal.

Detach. Live your fucking life homie. Put the shit in storage and SET FUCKING SAIL bro. Delete numbers or whatever you need to do man. Your serenity is not worth it. If you are incapable of moving on you may need to take a serious look at your level of co-dependency.

[fastfred]

Cono

Whiteroom beat me to it but here's my nickle of advice.


This is not your battle to fight. Walk away.


You didn't cause it you can't cure it and you can't control it.

Punching a store manager c'mon man. I know alcohol is evil and drugs and drinking are a plague on society. You have lots of resentment and anger. Let it go.

Try al anon. Seriously. Like white room said.

I've been dealing with alcoholics my whole life. My brother is an alcoholic and smokes crack.

He's trying to get sober. But just can't. In and out of jail. Talks the talk when he needs to manipulate some one. I used to support him but no more. Finally talked to him for the first time in two years and I told him to go fly a kite. Its just not worth the mental gymnastics anymore to soothe him and bow down to his bullshit.

[m2711c]

^^^ Pure truth right there.

[Whiteroom_Guardian]

The whole blood is thicker than water unconditional love 1950s shit just doesn't apply to addicts/alcoholics who just lie and manipulate and fuck those over who are trying to help them. Time and time again they will burn you. Sometimes the only thing that will save their life is being completely abandoned by everyone. If a drunk doesn't want to help themselves at all then us family/friends can't do a fucking thing. Period.

[XXX-er]

"" Learn to hate the shit. "" well this ^^ splains lots about Cono eh coincidentally

I just read an FB quote by my younger sister that said " learn to forgive others not becuz they deserve forgiveness but becuz you deserve peace "

which I thot was a good idea SO now I wonder if this means she is going to forgive my older sister ?

[Cono Este]

I appreciate those words guys. I can’t imagine your pain.

I have a counselor who is a past addiction specialist, probably should fire him

Yesterday her Mother said she’ll die. Told me that last yr. I stayed to try to give her some dignity when she came calling to detox, plus getting rid of dudes who were offering her money for sex and shit like that. It did get her here, for this chance. But I am fucking done.

[jackstraw]

Mental illness sucks. Alcoholism can often become a side effect of the underlying issue.

In my small personal size data sample, those that have kicked alcohol's ass and become clean were not necessarily mentally ill. They just drank too much, became dependent, and we're mentally strong enough to beat it.

Obviously the spectrum range for all of this is vast.

Wish everyone the best dealing with it

[Hott Butt Mud]

Checking in. I quit drinking. Long past due. About a week in and looking forward to keeping this going.

[riser4]

Checking in. I quit drinking. Long past due. About a week in and looking forward to keeping this going.

One day added to another, one at a time. May today be another rewarding day for you.

Making changes is hard work. I like the changes I have made in the last year. Feedback loops happen in both directions, going up and unfortunately going down.

[Cono Este]

Workout. I actually developed a very bad weed habit this yr coping with this shit. Very bad. I’m detoxing now, done with that shit. Night sweats, sleeping maybe 3-4 hrs all yr. I have too much free time, planning entire season now, will bug out in November. riding every am for two hrs, kettle bells in the afternoon until I drop, and finally dropping the dip. Headed to see family in uk in two weeks, stay busy.

[Whiteroom_Guardian]

Pretty sure my sister is doing 5 to 10 in state prison. She's been given one last chance at freedom from the courts and she is fucking it up as I type this. It doesn't have to get this bad people.