The worst car

[54-46]

Definition of putting lipstick on a pig.

Cadillac Cimarron

I liked that car; maybe because I got laid in one.

[BmillsSkier]

ahem.
let me just........ slow you all down a little, with your relatively speedy gremlins and LeCars and Yugos, as I pull in front of you, pitifully bogging down, coughing and sputtering climbing this gentle incline, attempting to hide behind a tiny black cloud, laying down the foul stench of failed engineering, perpetually leading a never-ending "parade of frustration" wherever I travel in The. Official. Worst. Car. Ever.....

the DIESEL fuckin CHEVETTE!

Holy. Shit. That is epic-ly bad.

^^^ That's a pretty bad car. I didn't even know they existed.

Right?!? It's like some kind of deformed unicorn.

So my friend's older brother had one of these. One day after high school, we loaded like 10 of us in it and went to the lake for some good old fashioned cliff jumpin at lake Allatoona (Bmills might have heard of it). We actually made it to the lake and nobody died jumping off the cliffs. But on the way back, something caught fire under the front passenger seat and we all had to Chinese fire drill it outta there. It looked like a clown show, ten teenage dudes jumping out of a burning Chevette. If I remember correctly, a drive shaft bearing went bad and caught the whole thing on fire somehow. It literally burnt to the ground on the side of Hwy 92. That was the end of hearing his brother brag on and on about the 55 miles a gallon.

That's hilarious. I can only imagine diving out of a burning shitbox like that. (Know Allatoona well. Every time we drive north to the mountains I try and hit up my buddy with a wake-boat there for a few tows.)

Anyway I thought I had the worst car ever to leave Detriot until my wife came home with a 78 Dodge Omni. Words cannot describe.

Hahaha. My college roommate had an Omni; late-80s I think. Stick. You could jam it in any gear at any speed with zero clutch and get the same result: lots of smoke and zero power. We drove it to a college about 3 hours away and it drank 6 whole quarts of oil. One way. He'd pull off to the side every so often to check the oil and dump another quart in - not that any gauges or warning lights worked (including the speedo), he just was in tune with the poor car.

The Chevy Citation was voted the least likely car to be stolen.

[BobMc]

On a more modern note, behold, the shittiest modern car made...



The 2002 BMW 745. We work on several of them and I try every time to convince the people to get rid of them. Guy calls today on one that he's dumped several thousand into it, now it's setting secondary air faults. He's complaining that he's had to put too much money into this car, I tell him, "Umm, we had this conversation about a year and several thousand dollars ago..."

[BmillsSkier]

It's not just the performance, it's the luxury. Used to drive this thing between Seattle and South Bay a few times a year, lounging on the front velour bench seat comfortably at a top speed of 66 mph...48 past Shasta.

Missed this before. That's fucking great.

On a more modern note, behold, the shittiest modern car made...



The 2002 BMW 745. We work on several of them and I try every time to convince the people to get rid of them. Guy calls today on one that he's dumped several thousand into it, now it's setting secondary air faults. He's complaining that he's had to put too much money into this car, I tell him, "Umm, we had this conversation about a year and several thousand dollars ago..."

Ha, too true. you see the '01 745i routinely on worst cars lists. As if the Bangle design wasn't bad enough to deter you, you had the worst of the iDrive system which I'm convinced its only purpose was to periodically zap various components dead at random. What a shitbox.

[Underoos]

My mom had an Eagle.

Then she had a Pontiac Parisienne like this one.




I drove it for a while in high school. Had three couples hooking up in at the same time one night.

Then she got a Roadmaster like this one. That thing hauled ass and you could fit a pizza on the dashboard.



Speaking of Griswolds, I get to see this beauty every day off my back deck. py photo but sure enough, "Honky Lips" is spraypainted on the rear quarter panel. Brings a smile to my face every damn day.

[ill-advised strategy]

those woody wagons are sweet.

I would drive the shit out of either of those.

how about this:

[BmillsSkier]

My mom had an Eagle.

Then she had a Pontiac Parisienne like this one.




I drove it for a while in high school. Had three couples hooking up in at the same time one night.

Then she got a Roadmaster like this one. That thing hauled ass and you could fit a pizza on the dashboard.



Speaking of Griswolds, I get to see this beauty every day off my back deck. py photo but sure enough, "Honky Lips" is spraypainted on the rear quarter panel. Brings a smile to my face every damn day.

those woody wagons are sweet.

I would drive the shit out of either of those.

how about this:

Why?

Why would someone do that?

[alias_rice]

The Chevy Citation was voted the least likely car to be stolen.

The flat tire is a nice touch.

[neufox47]

Pinto.

Not sure about the o-ring but they were the rear-end explodemobiles.

http://auto.howstuffworks.com/1971-1...rd-pinto12.htm

[old goat]

All you Crown Vic lovers--try getting a girl to go for a ride in one. She's gonna think you're a narc for sure. And if anyone was ever laid in the back seat of one, she had a gun to her head. But if you celibate crackers who took auto shop instead of math in high school are lusting after a CV, knock yourself out.

I didn't notice--has this one been mentioned yet?


Regarding the Pinto--Malcolm Gladwell did a piece about them in one of his books. Statistically the Pinto had no more deaths per mile driven than any other comparable car--but the mode of death was particularly gruesome and as the article pointed out, easily and cheaply preventable. I was glad to be rid of mine. It did get a fuel tank upgrade while I had it.

[Svengali]

[BmillsSkier]

You take that back.

[Obstruction]

Forgot about this one which definitely deserves a place in the motoring hall of shame. My first and only minivan - the execrable Ford Windstar!



Our 1995 was the same celery green color as the one shown above. This pos which we bought new reinforced the adage that I managed to forget about never buying a car from the first production year. After 2 years an about 40k miles the trans and head gaskets let go at about the same time. After 35k more miles and 7 more head gasket failures (paid for by Ford after much wrangling) and one more tranny. I gave up and donated this pig for a tax deduction.

[Timberridge]

Forgot about this one which definitely deserves a place in the motoring hall of shame. My first and only minivan - the execrable Ford Windstar!

This remains a very popular ride with the Hasidic community. There is a regular parade of these heading up to the Catskills and Western MA on Friday afternoon. Usually with more dents.

[BmillsSkier]

This remains a very popular ride with the Hasidic community. There is a regular parade of these heading up to the Catskills and Western MA on Friday afternoon. Usually with more dents.

Why is that? I've seen the same thing. It's like all Ford Windstars went to Crown Heights to die.

Old black men love a 1996 Chevy conversion van - with or without the high top.

Amish and Mennonites are devotees of the 1989 Ford Econoline 15 passenger.


And if anyone is looking to find the largest collection of Buick Rendevous still on the road I believe I found them all on a recent business trip to Detroit. Same for its cousin the Saturn Vue. A real dedicated crowd to these miserable shitboxes.

[The AD]

Amish and Mennonites are devotees of the 1989 Ford Econoline 15 passenger.

Amish aren't allowed to own cars. They can ride in them, so maybe that's why you often see them in vans.

[Mazderati]

What a bunch of freeloaders.

[The AD]

What a bunch of freeloaders.

I'm sure they'd be willing to put up a barn for you in exchange for a ride. Seems like a good trade.

[Mazderati]

It was a joke. But if their furniture prices are any indication, a barn will cost quite a bit more than a free ride in a passenger van.

[MagnificentUnicorn]

All you Crown Vic lovers--try getting a girl to go for a ride in one. She's gonna think you're a narc for sure. And if anyone was ever laid in the back seat of one, she had a gun to her head. But if you celibate crackers who took auto shop instead of math in high school are lusting after a CV, knock yourself out.

This thread is about worst cars ever not cars you don't like. The Crown Victoria is a fine automobile, later models are really nice. There's a reason for it's longevity as a police car and taxi. If you can't get laid driving a Crown Vic that says more about you than the car.

I'd drive this car

[Kenny Satch]

Let's not forget the Audi Sport Quattro
Years produced: 1983–1984
A friend of mine had one and said it was a money pit. Mind you he loved the car but sold it a year later.

[alias_rice]

No love for the pt cruiser convertible?

[Kenny Satch]

No love for the pt cruiser convertible?

Is that a factory job or was an oak veneer adhesive from Home Depot used?

After taking another look....i like it
Hate the hard top. Looks like a clown car

[old goat]

If you can't get laid driving a Crown Vic that says more about you than the car.

You're right--it's just a question of picking the right woman.

[Timberridge]

You're right--it's just a question of picking the right woman.

You have a nice house OG.