I love my wife and all, but Jesus Hercules Christ...

[klar]

Hey Klar, so what does it mean if you are handsome and handy?

Sounds like you might have a chance.

Nobody's perfect. He's probably a bad skier.

[powtario]

Way to go everybody!

How do people in Yurp know about Red Green?

[GimpToo]

Just had a real doozie of a conversation

My son's team that I coach has a game later today. The manager sent out an email that said game was at 11....turns out the game is at 11:20

I figured this out as the wife and I were planning our departure time. Upon learning of the new, later time she says "so we're just going to get there early now?"

When I told her (in a very deliberate tone) "no, we're are going to leave later than we originally planned so we DON'T get there so early" she came back with "I'm not an idiot, you don't have to talk to me like that"


Love you!...(puff puff)

You're the coach of your kid's team and you can't get there 20 minutes early? Instead, you have to be a douche and speak to your wife "in a very deliberate tone"

[booner]

You're the coach of your kid's team and you can't get there 20 minutes early? Instead, you have to be a douche and speak to your wife "in a very deliberate tone"

I do get there early dippy

so an email gives the wrong time, and then I figure out the mistake but should still show up at wrong time.

got it

you should be a professional planner


i hope for your sake you're still drunk from last night

my post was about her not getting it and then you REALLY didn't get it...wow

[stompinlines]

Gimptoo- are you a wife?

[TomCrac]

Your gal, at the least, better be fun to look at.

Nobody ever said life was gonna be fair son.

[uglymoney]

I come home from work today and go out in the garage to spend a few minutes on my Subaru short block swap project and discover the garage is full of smoke. I go into emergency action mode unplugging everything, disconnect the battery in the lawn tractor, take batteries out of my heater. Go into the garage attic and unplug the radon fan which has been getting noisy because the bearings only seem to last five years. I think that is it. To be sure everything is cool I take the ladder outside and go up on the roof and check everything over. This all takes me about an hour and when I close the garage door the smell and smoke don't come back so I think I have the situation dialed.

I text info to wife. She gets back to me right away to let me know that her and my stepson were in the garage burning school papers this morning for a 7th grade project but she forgot to let me know...or air out the god damned garage because opening the automatic door was something they just didn't have time for.

Sigh.

[PNWbrit]

"well it's a stupid place for anyone to have put a post in a garage...."

[KenJongIll]

Love you honey!

Wife has never understood the concept of a thermostat, especially in a vehicle. It's set to either the lowest or the highest temp possible, and usually both in a single car ride. The thought of setting it at a comfortable temp? Nope.
I've given up on this...and most other things. It's the smart thing to do.

[Elkhound Odin]

Shit is absolutely perfect this morning, but the wife wants to be a stick in the mud. Kid asked if we could go play golf instead of skiing (it's supposed to be almost 70 in Denver), so the wife starts huffing around the house talking about how she's trying to get better at skiing and I just bought her new ski boots and now no one wants to go. It never occurred to me that dropping $550 on new ski boots for your wife's birthday could be construed as a bad thing. I dropped a splash of scotch in my coffee, so now she's struggling with the fact that she has a golf bum for a daughter and an alcoholic for a husband. Must be tough...

Be happy you have a wife that can and wants to ski. After my wife's 4th cervical fusion I had to sell all her gear so she would stop whining every time she looked at them in the garage. My ski days decreased dramatically after that. Maybe we can trade wives? She's always going on how she wants to live in the woods without any neighbors in shouting distance.

[Flyoverland Captive]

Wife has never understood the concept of a thermostat, especially in a vehicle. It's set to either the lowest or the highest temp possible, and usually both in a single car ride. The thought of setting it at a comfortable temp? Nope.

Mine's the same way. The scene:

A hot 90F day. Wife is home, AC on in house, set at 80, windows shut. At 9pm, I get home, and it's cooled down to 75 outside, so I start opening windows to cool the place down.
"What are you doing?" she asks. She then closes the windows, and cranks the AC down to 70.
"What are YOU doing?" I ask, "It's cooling off outside."
"I know. It will cool off inside faster if we run the AC."

[jfost]

... After my wife's 4th cervical fusion ...

just be happy she's had her cervix fused. We are on kid #3 and I'm afraid it is going to be up to me to do the snip snip...

[single]

just be happy she's had her cervix fused.

Not sure if you are joking, or...?

My fiancee is pretty great, but a little gullible sometimes. I caught her explaining what a jackalope was to her roommate from new zealand. I stepped in when she was mulling over what part of the US they live in.

[warthog]

I stepped in when she was mulling over what part of the US they live in.

That's easy- the red states.

PNW- hope that wasn't your inheritance car from the FIL. Wasn't it a De Tomaso Pantera?

[PNWbrit]

PNW- hope that wasn't your inheritance car from the FIL. Wasn't it a De Tomaso Pantera?

Nope just a commuter/grocery getter.

The Pantera about to be become a warm topic. Her maternal Grandfather just died. His son (wife's uncle) is "dealing with" the estate. I have little doubt the car is going to somehow find it's way into his garage.

[MagnificentUnicorn]

Love you honey!

Wife has never understood the concept of a thermostat, especially in a vehicle. It's set to either the lowest or the highest temp possible, and usually both in a single car ride. The thought of setting it at a comfortable temp? Nope.
I've given up on this...and most other things. It's the smart thing to do.

How about jumping in a cold car when it's below freezing and pushing the thermostat to high and cranking the fan all the way up? That will surely heat things up faster, won't it?

[booner]

Wife has never understood the concept of a thermostat, especially in a vehicle. It's set to either the lowest or the highest temp possible, and usually both in a single car ride. The thought of setting it at a comfortable temp? Nope.
I've given up on this...and most other things. It's the smart thing to do.

Fuck, does that hit home

The best part is how baffled they are when you explain how simple it is to go up or down a degree or two

[stfu&gbtw]

Maybe we can trade wives?

Seems like if this would be worth it, you would have posted a pic already...

[iceman]

A hot 90F day. Wife is home, AC on in house, set at 80, windows shut. At 9pm, I get home, and it's cooled down to 75 outside, so I start opening windows to cool the place down.
"What are you doing?" she asks. She then closes the windows, and cranks the AC down to 70.
"What are YOU doing?" I ask, "It's cooling off outside."
"I know. It will cool off inside faster if we run the AC."

Now, wait. Are you sure she's wrong? What's the goal temperature and how windy was it out? Do you have a lot of windows? Is this a single-story house or does it have an upper story? Was the still sun on the house?

You have 3 choices: open windows only, ac only and open windows/ac together. Choice one is out I'd say, unless the goal is 75 and it's very windy out. But whether choice 2 or choice 3 cools the house faster is a complicated exercise in thermodynamics. Energy use is not germane to the point she made.

[TahoeJ]

just be happy she's had her cervix fused. We are on kid #3 and I'm afraid it is going to be up to me to do the snip snip...

Cervix fused does not equal tubes tied. I had kid #3 and did the snip a few months back - just do it - it's not that big of a deal. I know we're collectively bitching about the lady folks, but guys can be such pussies sometimes. (not calling you out specifically, I have several friends in the same boat, and I also built it up way too much)

Back to wife complaints... I had no idea the thermostat was a wife thing, but add mine to the list. In the car, she'll jack the thing up full blast. "I'm drying my hair." Great... I guess I should have brought another shirt to change into when we get there.

[hikesalot]

just be happy she's had her cervix fused. We are on kid #3 and I'm afraid it is going to be up to me to do the snip snip...

Note to self: men complain about their flaky wives, but do not understand that cervical fusion is related to the spine, not the vagina. I should not be surprised.

[Flyoverland Captive]

Now, wait. Are you sure she's wrong? ... Energy use is not germane to the point she made.

True; I just hate using AC when I can have nature cool my house for me.

[iceman]

True; I just hate using AC when I can have nature cool my house for me.

I was more hoping for a plane on a treadmill-type thing but I guess I'll just accept your quick surrender instead.

[concretejungle]

Post #84. I still can't fathom why you all let women take control of the thermostat.

[Danno]

pretty sure that this is jfost right now