FACK!!!

[SPREAD EAGLE]

I'm gonna go nutz!!! DUMPAGE here in OOTAH and I haven't made a turn since mid-FEB. AAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
straight jacket please - cause GIMP CENTRAL isn't where I want to hang

[Kellie]

Seconded. Biggest season in Tahoe in years - stuck in the Bay Area with a job I'm not stoked on and zero recreation - on an emotional roller coaster from anger to indignance. I certainly don't feel like this is much of the "growing experience" everyone says it will be. That's bullshit of the truest form!!!!!!! Fuck starting from ground zero.

[Huckwheat]

Yeah.....bluebird powderday at Squaw, with 16 inches fresh.......I am really enjoying it from my couch .

Just talked to Britney on the cell....she was on KT (with all our friends) describing her first hand accounts of people running the fingers and skiing the Eagles Nest. Painful.

Actually though, I seem to be a total glutton. Some people (like Kellie ) avoid skiing, but I seem to be glued to these boards and making all my friends give me the first hand accounts. I think my desire to get back out there (next year) is my fuel for rehab.

OK, off to crutch to the bathroom....then I will need to rest againl.

[Kellie]

Yeah, I wonder why that's the case, HW. I still kind of want nothing to do with skiing. Although I know that next year I'll want to be back out there, and I know how it will make me feel, I am also realizing that I am not totally fueled by a need to be back out there. All I want is to be well enough to be active. I didn't ski for my entire adolescence and found things to throw myself into. Then I started skiing again and loved it, but also had a good balance with other outdoor pursuits. Then skiing took over. It's so easy to get caught up in, but is that really the way to be? Because what happens when it's gone?

I think a lot of it is the effort that it takes to be a passionate skier, packing 75+ days in . . . while working full time, 3 hours away from the nearest snow. I think the reason I feel the way I do is that I am tired of always wishing I am somewhere else. What happened to appreciating the here and now? I am great at that while in the mountains, but that's only the weekends, at this point.

My drive for getting well is a need to be back out there challenging myself. Skiing certainly provides this, but I think I can find it in a lot of areas. I want to feel the burn, I want to climb hills and feel the intense sense of accomplishment that comes with it. I want to feel like I can't make it, push through, and then come out on top. These are the feelings I live for. I also want to climb peaks, discover perfect snow, and nail lines on the way down. I want to explore areas, wake up to mountain sunrises, and basque in the perfection of the high alpine.

So far, this experience has made me realize I need to make life changes: either in passions or geography. But I cannot continue this path for much longer, I am realizing. My analogy is this: when your life gets turned upside down, you look around from this new perspective and realize that some other things are in your current orientation. The question is: what are you going to do about it?

And that's the end of this midnight rant . . .

[gincognito]

...I certainly don't feel like this is much of the "growing experience" everyone says it will be. That's bullshit of the truest form!!!!!!! ...

So far, this experience has made me realize I need to make life changes: either in passions or geography. But I cannot continue this path for much longer, I am realizing. My analogy is this: when your life gets turned upside down, you look around from this new perspective and realize that some other things are in your current orientation. The question is: what are you going to do about it?

Hmmm...seems like you're spouting your fair share of "bullshit" there... Sounds like a growing experience to me.

Sick and ashamed and happy (and ducking and covering),
d.

[Kellie]

Hmmm...seems like you're spouting your fair share of "bullshit" there... Sounds like a growing experience to me.

Sick and ashamed and happy (and ducking and covering),
d.

You POS, why can't you just let me be stubborn and obstinate??!?!?!?!?

[gincognito]

You POS, why can't you just let me be stubborn and obstinate??!?!?!?!?

gincognito goes to look up obstinate in the dictionary...

Sick and ashamed and happy (and kellie has a nice vocabulary...for an engineering geek),
d.

[Kellie]

Laying in bed listening to music and one of my favorite "drive to Kirkwood" songs came on . . . got that feeling of getting out of the truck on a pow day with anticipation and pure joy. Damn what a feeling! It's been awhile since I realized how much I miss skiing.

[pointemstraight]

I've been going through your same roller coaster (although non-injured). Living in LA and driving 5-6 hours to ski is killing me. Especially after living in CO and having 100+ day season, this real-world shit blows. And my friends back home in MN are always wondering if I plan on moving back. I like it there, but I've gotta have mountains. And they always say "Oh, you can go on vacation to the mountains," but none of them realize that it's just not the same. A few ski vacations hoping to hit good snow, being all out of ski shape, etc. just doesn't cut it. They don't understand the level of my skiing addiction, and the need for snow.

And I hear you with those "drive to skiing" songs. Everytime Social D. comes on, it brings me back to CO....

[50kLeg]

Second biggest season in Mammoth and I have my first season ending injury ever halfway through the season. This definately sucks. Especially the phone calls from my buds after a day of sunny riding when they are BBQin and drinking.

[Kellie]

This one gets a bump because I think I may lose my mind soon. It's been over six months since I've skied, so that means winter is here, right?!? I mean, that's the way it works . . . ski through May start again in November = 6 months without. So, where is the snow? When do I get to ski? I am not sure if I can wait any longer, and I am praying for a good season!!! It seems like summer won't end . . . and between being on my bikes a lot and getting my road bike stolen, I think I am ready to hang 'em up for some planks! HELP!

[truth]

This one gets a bump because I think I may lose my mind soon. It's been over six months since I've skied, so that means winter is here, right?!? I mean, that's the way it works . . . ski through May start again in November = 6 months without.

You'll get no sympathy from me.

[FollowMe]

More than 7 for me, likely at least 1 more to go (I figure 1 more on top of that for the really, really, really good shit) - - and I'm stoked about that. I just wanna tuck up, point 'em, float turns, and wheelie some high speed run outs - - all that good stuff! Light, dry, steep and deep baby. P. S. Hang in there Truth.

[Kellie]

You'll get no sympathy from me.

Definitely not asking for sympathy - just venting my anxiety.

[truth]

Definitely not asking for sympathy - just venting my anxiety.

implied

[SPREAD EAGLE]

Kellie and others...

it has been way too long as I am in my 7th. A friend wants to head up Timpanogas this weekend so I am thinking it's on since I got my jones on also.
I am wondering about the 8 hour round trip with full gear in tote on the knee but please, I have been killin' it on the bike and construction job has been great re-habbage so I am into it for sure.

For pics of where I may go check out www.mattturley.com
look at the journal and the epic of August 5th I think. It ain't pow but it's a snowfield!

Git SOME!!!

[Kellie]

Definitely go get some (if you think you're ready) . . . After my 6 month mark, I may try to do the same, but we'll see. Enjoy!

[Kellie]

Then skiing took over. It's so easy to get caught up in, but is that really the way to be? Because what happens when it's gone?

I think a lot of it is the effort that it takes to be a passionate skier, packing 75+ days in . . . while working full time, 3 hours away from the nearest snow. I think the reason I feel the way I do is that I am tired of always wishing I am somewhere else. What happened to appreciating the here and now? I am great at that while in the mountains, but that's only the weekends, at this point.

...

So far, this experience has made me realize I need to make life changes: either in passions or geography. But I cannot continue this path for much longer, I am realizing. My analogy is this: when your life gets turned upside down, you look around from this new perspective and realize that some other things are in your current orientation. The question is: what are you going to do about it?

So, that was a few months ago, and here I am forgetting what that felt like. I have an amazing opportunity in front of me (potentially) that should allow me some significant time off this winter, as well as a great work/activity life balance in an amazing place . . . but something has me not wanting to leave here now. Why is that? Have I gotten too comfortable? Is summer warping my brain? How come the weekend warrior insanity coupled with "always wanting to be somewhere else" and a visitor to my passions doesn't sound so bad right now? What am I holding on to about this place?

This post also has a midnight rant quality about it, but where better to vent than amongst internet friends? I think I am going to quit my job very soon, but tonight I ran the Morgan Chase Corporate Challenge in San Francisco. I had a great time with my coworkers and ran in one of the most beautiful cities in the world. I feel like there is still so much here to appreciate, but I've always felt the urge to go. But now, on the point of leaving, I feel the urge to stay. Is it just fear of leaving what's become comfortable? Is it not wanting to give up?

Anyway, share insight if you'd like . . . or otherwise, thanks for "listening"

[yentna]

It's all in how comfortable you get, you are absolutely right. I had a really hard time leaving Alaska, and utterly hated Utah with a passion when I first got here, it was quite the difficult time. But now, I love it here so much and can't even IMAGINE living anywhere else. On visits to my old home, I feel twinges of missing it, but still don't want to live there, and know it would never be the same as I remember it. So, I don't really have any advice for you, just the grim - and positive too - facts.
If you decide to leave San Fran to pursue your passions, it'll probably really seem to suck at first, but if skiing is what you love then after a while you'll realize you made the right choice. IMHO.