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Thread: Coon Huntin'

  1. #1
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    Coon Huntin'

    i live in a natl. park in San Francisco...take a guess which one...and have recently been having some coon issues.

    The bastards make a mockery of our trash/recycle cans every single night, as well as our neighbor's cans. My 2nd story window looks out right on the scene of the crime and the fucker(s) (not sure if its one rogue coon or a pack, but its usually just one) wake me up at ~3AM about every night.

    I've given up throwing projectiles out my window, as the coon is fairly indifferent to flying nalgenes and old skateboard decks.

    Im at the point now where i think my only option is a high powered pellet rifle with a "hunting" tipped pellet, going for a clean kill. The sunvabitch will literally just sit there staring at me- which is why I think I can get a clean shot off late at night, maybe a spotlight or flashlight would help?

    My question is 2-fold:

    1.) Will the pellet rifle do the trick?

    2.) What are the legalities surrounding this proposed coon-massacre?

    A few more points:
    I dont want to buy a trap, as Im staring at said high powered pellet rifle right now- path of least resistance.

    Don't have a garage, or any place to move the cans inside.

    Lids are already bungeed shut, those varmints are crafty. These are heavy duty, govt. issued cans.

  2. #2
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    I would go trap, which is likely legal, then accelerate their demise elsewhere.
    Something about the wrinkle in your forehead tells me there's a fit about to get thrown
    And I never hear a single word you say when you tell me not to have my fun
    It's the same old shit that I ain't gonna take off anyone.
    and I never had a shortage of people tryin' to warn me about the dangers I pose to myself.

    Patterson Hood of the DBT's

  3. #3
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    smear some shit under the garbage can lid handle, but be ready for retaliation...
    ... jfost is really ignorant, he often just needs simple facts laid out for him...

  4. #4
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    Wouldn't it be easier to just hit it with a few pellets and see if that chases it off first?

  5. #5
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    Leave him a few IPAs.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by iceman View Post
    Wouldn't it be easier to just hit it with a few pellets and see if that chases it off first?
    "I've given up throwing projectiles out my window, as the coon is fairly indifferent to flying nalgenes and old skateboard decks."

    We have had some loud late night showdowns with me blindly reaching for anything within arm's reach of my bed to huck out the window at him...Ive popped him on the nose with a nalgene and he didn't even bat an eye.

  7. #7
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    Get a 55 gallon trash can. fill 2/3-3/4 with water. Cut out a circular wooden platform smaller than the diameter of the opening of the trash can. Place a rod across the trash can opening. Put the circular platform on top of that. Place a can open can of cat food or other assorted food on top of that.
    you get a fool proof coon trap. Those fuckers can only swim for so long.

    also works well for cats.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by skiATL View Post
    Get a 55 gallon trash can. fill 2/3-3/4 with water. Cut out a circular wooden platform smaller than the diameter of the opening of the trash can. Place a rod across the trash can opening. Put the circular platform on top of that. Place a can open can of cat food or other assorted food on top of that.
    you get a fool proof coon trap. Those fuckers can only swim for so long.

    also works well for cats.
    Thats fucked up, especially the murdering of your neighbours' pets part.

    Just shoot the bastard or better yet secure your cans better as this will not be a one time occurence.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by skiATL View Post
    Get a 55 gallon trash can. fill 2/3-3/4 with water. Cut out a circular wooden platform smaller than the diameter of the opening of the trash can. Place a rod across the trash can opening. Put the circular platform on top of that. Place a can open can of cat food or other assorted food on top of that.
    you get a fool proof coon trap. Those fuckers can only swim for so long.

    also works well for cats.
    Sounds like a slick idea if you could keep the cats away. Keep in mind that another troop of them will likely take their place though. Got a dog to scare them away? Coons are tough but they will likely stay away from danger. I've booted a woodchuck that was charging me at least 20 feet in the air and it must have went at least 100 feet and landed on a concrete city street. That fucker got right up and ran off. Animals are tough.

  10. #10
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    The last, quail-egg-theavin'-bandit-coon I shot was with a .270. It did the trick but I think you'll need something with a little more Charles Bronson than a pellet gun to kill one.

  11. #11
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    Coons are tough. Unless you nail it right in the brain, your pellet gun won't kill it, at least not immediately. You could gut-shot it and depending on where you hit it, it will die a slow death. Or not. In any case, a pellet gun is not the right tool for the job.

    Surely you can outsmart a coon. Find something better than a bungee cord to hold the lid on with. If the coon can't get into the trash it'll stop coming around.

    If you can't do that either, then trap it or use the trash can drowning method above.
    ...Some will fall in love with life and drink it from a fountain that is pouring like an avalanche coming down the mountain...

    "I enjoy skinny skiing, bullfights on acid..." - Lacy Underalls

    The problems we face will not be solved by the minds that created them.

  12. #12
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    http://www.tetongravity.com/forums/s...les?highlight=

    Got the Bone Collector rifle in the first picture. Shoots 1300 fps. I think it would kill a raccoon, but you would have to be a really good shot. You would probably just injure it. Not sure how you feel about that, but I wouldn't do it.

    If you want to keep him on his toes, and make your place his least favorite food spot, just get a cheap daisy and sting his ass each time you catch him. They're smart. He'll find a less painful source for food. I have heard cayenne pepper around the cans works too. Maybe load up a cayenne/habanero/ water and olive oil mix into a high powered water gun. Supersoak his ass. I bet it would work. They hate pepper.
    I like living where the Ogdens are high enough so that I'm not everyone's worst problem.- YetiMan

  13. #13
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    Get a paintball gun and mark the shit out of him. I'll bet you actually have several. Shoot each one with a different color. That way you won't get branded an octopus killer in Commifornia.
    In order to properly convert this thread to a polyasshat thread to more fully enrage the liberal left frequenting here...... (insert latest democratic blunder of your choice).

  14. #14
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    Subsonic .22 rounds might do the trick.
    Damn, we're in a tight spot!

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by RockChalk View Post
    "I've given up throwing projectiles out my window, as the coon is fairly indifferent to flying nalgenes and old skateboard decks."
    Well until now you didn't say that you'd actually hit him. I still think that a pellet in the ass would make more of an impression than an empty Nalgene lobbed out a window, call me crazy.

  16. #16
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    fix your trashcans so they can't get into then and they'll go away. stop giving them an easy meal.

  17. #17
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    gang of coons can be very intimidating

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by flowing alpy View Post
    gang of coons can be very intimidating
    Click image for larger version. 

Name:	2004-06-02 01.02.29.jpg 
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  19. #19
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    ,,,or just shake a liberal amount of Ajax cleaner all over your garbage as it sits in the can. That deters most animals. Their food smells like bleach.

  20. #20
    Hugh Conway Guest
    get irul to start having anonymous gay sex in the alley way - problem solved

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by refried View Post
    fix your trashcans so they can't get into then and they'll go away. stop giving them an easy meal.
    Yeah. Its sort of obvious but then again most people who live in the city get their knowledge of animals from Disney and Pixar. Coons are persistent, bold and they have "thumbs" that allow them to manipulate simple latches but they are not really all that clever. Just weight down the lids or install a locking device. Yo, rockchalk, just be glad your garbage pest doesn't weigh 300 lbs and isn't capable of ripping you apart. Or spraying vile musk. Or have dog maiming quills. But seriously, raccoon populations are one of the biggest reservoirs of rabies virus out there so seal up your cans. Killing them will do you no good because you have a niche there and soon enough new raccoons will move in. It's inevitable; no predators and coons will overpopulate when they get extra food. The state parks up the coast all the way to the olympic peninsula are overrun with beggar coons and half starve every winter when the tourists are gone. Starving coons are beyond bold. They'll jump up on a picnic table and swat a pot of soup off a burning stove. I rarely see raccoons in the Tetons, probably because they make a good meal for fishers, coyotes, golden eagles and cougars.

    Plus, if you get caught killing cute animals in a park, in Hippy Heaven no less, expect a horde of lesbian vegan PETA types to call for your blood or, at least, your exile to Oakland. Cuz, in the Bay Area, someone accused of shooting a raccoon might make the evening news. As for the laws, you aren't even allowed to pick flowers or gather morels in the national parks I am familiar with so killing the animals is probably not allowed.
    Last edited by neckdeep; 11-13-2012 at 12:54 PM.

  22. #22
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    How about using your superior human brain to coon-proof your garbage cans? Urban raccoon populations are on a steep upward curve in North America. Toronto has the worst urban coon problem in NA. See Toronto web page re coon-proofing your residence.

    If you are incapable of outsmarting the coons and thus elect to kill them, why no traps? Coon traps are very effective. One of our neighbors got the rage against the coons a few years ago and did a bunch of trapping. No coons on our block for a couple years but they are now coming back.

  23. #23
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    If you wait long enough the rabies will get 'em. Once the population density gets high enough rabies explodes through it. We used to have a huge raccoon problem, now I haven't seen one in probably five years.

    Doesn't do much for you in the short term, but hey.

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hugh Conway View Post
    get irul to start having anonymous gay sex in the alley way - problem solved
    Anonymous? Are you going to wear a mask when you blow me from now on?
    Quando paramucho mi amore de felice carathon.
    Mundo paparazzi mi amore cicce verdi parasol.
    Questo abrigado tantamucho que canite carousel.


  25. #25
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    Just leave a 40 pound bag of dog food next to your trash cans.

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