Rusty Nails and the Man Blouse: or AKA What hath Seattle wraught!

[Odin]

I need a cold compress and a stiff drink.

Really.

My world has been turned upside down.

Chapter 1: In the Gloaming

It all started innocently enough. Skiing in the morning at alpenglow, a chance meeting with AKpowderMankey. Rusty and I carving arcs into the smooth surface of a windbuff soft crust.

Ah but who knew WHAT the night would bring.

We repaired to the domicile of FriendOfRusty, referred to everafter as B. Plans were made to attend dinner and drunkeness was discussed. In the great tradition of male bonding, episodes of Charlie Murphies True Hollywood Stories were summoned from the depths of Tivo.

Who knew the foreshadowing that was placed.

Chapter 2: PURIFY YOURSELF IN THE WATERS OF LAKE MINNETONKA

The Prince episode was broadcast and chorteling was involved. I went to bathe myself as I was verklempt from a long day of skiing and changing tires. I arrived back downstairs to a discussion of clothes. Now please comprehend that the normal Alaskan discussion of clothes is Carhartts vs Jeans vs Camo. There IS limited room for flexibility within the Anchorage scene, however unless we were going to open up the keg of pretentiousness called rumrunners, those options were not to be explored.

HOWEVER!

Rusty emerged from the bathroom wearing what can only be described as THE MAN BLOUSE. Resplendent in its glory it shimmered as though recently off a trendy Seattlite Discotheque Dance Floor. I saw God, Jesus, and The Devil all at once as colors and twirls that entranced me permiated my brain.

We cried and wept as though confronted by something greater than we all were. "B" broke the reverie however by stating, "You know DAMN well where you got that from, and it wasn't the MEN's department"

Chapter 3: Yankees 1

Aprehension was obvious as the fate of the man blouse was to be decided then and for all. Removed it was, for all that it was worth and the generalizations came forth.

It was found that perhaps more seattle maggots had clothes and coiffures of such magnitude. I heard stories of BIG COLLARS, BRIGHT COLORS, and STRIPED BUTTON DOWN SHIRTS

THIS WILL NOT DO!

Chapter 4: The Rescue - or - How I came to love the Hoodie and save the world

We can and will save the seattle maggots from the burgeoning trend of super maggotsexuality. One hoody from each of you can and will be airlifted to the seattle/tacoma/bellingham area to be distributed amongst the men of that area. please log on to www.saveseattlemaggotsfrommanblouses.com and donate your hoody today!

Please! Only you can save a maggot.

[Castro's]

The link DON'T work! And I'm ready to help save a maggot!

[The AD]

While he lived in Alaska Rusty was forced to hide his true personality as a metrosexual. He tried to put up a macho front, but every night he cried himself to sleep because there was nowhere he could get a good pedicure.

[Buster Highmen]

Crenillated coruscations brought about by indirections to Seinfelds frilly shirt episode?

[Viva]

An Angry Whelk hoodie might do the trick.

[A-wreck]

Crenillated coruscations brought about by indirections to Seinfelds frilly shirt episode?

so rusty's friend and neighbor is dating a low-talking clothing designer?

[Zeedashbo]

NOBODY WILL EVER CATCH Z- IN A MAN BLOUSE!

ICH BIN DER KONIG AUS DEN HOODIE!

NEIN IN DER POOPENHAUSEN!
http://www.biglines.com/photos/blpic28809.jpg



i have no excuse for mr. nails, or other trendy shirt wearing seattleites. also, i have no excuse for myself, i slept on yoda's bed. but i will take hoodie donations. russell athletic only, XXL.

[optics]

I own roughly equal amounts of hoodies and button-down shirts. I own nothing shiny, nothing blousy, nothing bright.

I pass blame on to two groups of people: women, and the man.

[Odin]

Names have been named: Rusty Rolled.

Fess up before the calling out ensues.

[joshbu]

Don't look at me. I wear t-shirts. I think the poor misguided lad took it on himself in a pursuit of a higher plane of smooveness...

[Buster Highmen]

http://www.biglines.com/photos/blpic28809.jpg
An opportunity was really missed when z-bo went to bed without the braids and boobs y'know.

[Buster Highmen]

I own roughly equal amounts of hoodies and button-down shirts. I own nothing shiny, nothing blousy, nothing bright.

I pass blame on to two groups of people: women, and the man.

So says the man who, after inviting me to socialize in briefs (or briefly, what does the philology matter?), stood me up at the NWAC benefit.

Harruuumpphhhhhhh!

[Odin]

The light of truth begins to shine upon Optics.

REPENT!

[Viva]

after inviting me to socialize...

Marx, Lennin, Mao, Highman...

[Buster Highmen]

Marx, Lennin, Mao, Highman...

Marx, Lenin, Stalin, Trotsky
Optics thinks Viva's really hotski.

[truth]

The light of truth begins to shine upon Optics.

Leave me out of this you fear mongering phalistine.

# 9 is mine....muhahaha!

[Odin]

Leave me out of this you fear mongering phalistine.

PAGING DOCTOR FREUD

[optics]

So says the man who, after inviting me to socialize in briefs (or briefly, what does the philology matter?), stood me up at the NWAC benefit.

Harruuumpphhhhhhh!

Guilty. But see my previous post for the guilty influences. Same two, too.

I am, as the french say, en wack (and had little faith in the cod foie's powers).

That said, my shirts are still dull cotton. I'm guilty of odd coiffure, but that's because fashion loves nerds lately. I had it first.

[optics]

Marx, Lennon, Mao, Highman...

http://www.lyrics.com/m/marx,_richard/richard.marx.jpg

http://www.bobgruen.com/files/johnle...%20CURL-74.jpg

http://ronwalker.org/china/mao.JPG

?

[Odin]

Highman

http://www.born-today.com/Today/pix/zappa_f.jpg

[optics]

And you question the source of Rusty's fashion foibles?

[The AD]

http://ronwalker.org/china/mao.JPG

No no no. I think you meant:

http://www.nba.com/media/act_yao_ming.jpg


Oh, sorry. That's Yao, not Mao.

[optics]

Easy mistake to make, what with the red and all.

[Rusty Nails]

So Odin stirs a pot that he once swam in. I ask, my young friend, which one of us wore a collared shirt out that night? Which one of us drank TWO strawberry lemonade vodkas? Which one of us kept talking about the Kenneth Cole shoes he used to wear when he lived in "Colorado?" Your Valdez wardrobe reveals itself as nothing but a facade. You are a closet metrosexual and the fact that you drive a Subaru Forester is only further proof.

As for Z-Bo (who does not wear just hoodies), Joshbu (and his "Microsoft intellectual" spectacles) and others in the crowd crying "not me" and thereby lying not only to yourselves, but everyone else -- be ashamed. Be very ashamed.

Also, about damn time that picture of Z-bo passed out on the dog-bed made the board. Poor Yoda -- she looks so confused in that picture.

[Big E]

So Odin stirs a pot that he once swam in. I ask, my young friend, which one of us wore a collared shirt out that night? Which one of us drank TWO strawberry lemonade vodkas? Which one of us kept talking about the Kenneth Cole shoes he used to wear when he lived in "Colorado?" Your Valdez wardrobe reveals itself as nothing but a facade. You are a closet metrosexual and the fact that you drive a Subaru Forester is only further proof.

The pen is indeed mightier than the sword.