It's Official, Winter is Near

**BobMc** · 10-11-2004, 09:47 PM

Every year the realization it is getting cold is thrown in my face. I usually notice it's getting a bit cooler at night, but never really think about it. Yesterday and tonight were my wake up call to the reality...

Let me digress a bit, we bought our house about 7 years ago. When we bought the house our subdivision was fairly new and surrounded by fields on all sides. Our house is located on what was probably farmland. All of this open field land and now houses support a rather thriving population of vermin/mice.

I can practically mark the day on the calender when these little adversaries will begin coming in my house. A few cold nights and in they come. I've been doing battle with them for the last 7 years. A few of you may remember my tale of grinding up one in the garbage disposal.

Just like Puxatawney Phil, these little fellows are my winter forecasters. Yesterday while sitting in my living room I spy the first entrant of the year. I watched him run past my sliding glass door behind our entertainment center. Pretty good sized and definitely a quick one, he dawdled a bit unseen behind the entertainment center. I went back to surfing the web and kept half an eye on the TV.

After a bit he ran from the TV to my fireplace (what I wouldn't have given to had an actual fire in there at the time). He quickly explored the firebox and then squeezed through one of the vent holes at the mouth of the insert. At that point I ran for the pellet pistol. I figured I'd be able to get a shot off at him with only a slim chance of damaging something in the house. Eventually he showed his face on the other side's vents. I took two wild shots and missed with both of them. Of course it hit me after I shot it probably wouldn't have been the best place to shoot him. Him falling back into the insert with no way of retrieval would make for an olfactic delight upon the first fire of the year.

Neither shot seemed to phase him much, he merely went back to the original side and stuck only his head out for quite a while. I think he was gauging me, sensing my quickness and accuracy. Obviously his appraisal was spot on, after a bit of quick looks he shot out and behind my couch without me even getting a shot off. I was off to do other things and left him to his purchase in my house.

Of course I forgot to buy mouse traps today, he currently is behind my couch. He's getting quite bold tonight, scurrying about the furniture knowing I'm currently unarmed. I've got about 8 beers in me right now, watching the Packers game. I'm getting drunk and pissed, about to soon become armed.

Oh yes, he will be mine...

BobMc

**powderhound** · 10-11-2004, 09:53 PM

Those f-ing Packers!!

**iceman** · 10-11-2004, 09:56 PM

While I generally don't actually hunt the rodents that make their way into my house, I will admit to a certain sense of victory when in the quiet of the night I hear that "SNAP" that confirms my trap was well-baited and well-placed.

**Ski Beaver** · 10-11-2004, 10:00 PM

It's 34 Degrees Celcius here today, ski season finished last weekend for me.

Winter must be close for you guys.

**The AD** · 10-11-2004, 10:05 PM

Today also brought home to me that winter is near. My damn furnace konked out

After waiting for the repairman all afternoon he shows up right when I would usually get home from work (typical). Turns out it was a faulty nozzle. The same nozzle they installed a few weeks ago when we go a tune-up on the furnace. Serves me right, I guess.

**Crinkle** · 10-11-2004, 10:06 PM

oh yeah,
same here tonight, but I got the kill. After a little shopping with the Mrs. we come downstairs to my office and she yells that she saw a mouse crawl under my labtop bag (empty). I told her she must have had too much to drink, cause I didn't see it. Well she insists and i proceed to stomp the shit out of my bag. Lift it up.....nothing there. Meanwhile I close the office door, trapping the mouse, my wife and my 2 dogs inside my office, increasing the chances of catching a mouse if it is really there.

So thinking there is no mouse, I drop the bag and BANG, the mouse runs out from under the desk. Now my hunt is on, the dogs are going nutz in my 12'x19' office with a huge desk in the middle. Now I am trying to find the mouse, the dogs are circling the desk. Finally I realize where she must be; between the computer tower and the wall of the desk. I pick up the tower slightly, BOOM, she falls right into my trap and goes UNDER the tower. Whoops, sorry honey, as I proceed to stomp the shit out that little bitch with my tower, which was on and suffered no damage. The dogs were going insane, wife was laughing. I picked up the tower slightly and I guess the carpet didn't provide the pinching point i was expecting to finish this mouse off. So I quick scooped her up with a plastic bag, tied it in a knot and gave it a few good whacks against the desk.

Crinkle 1 Mices 0

**release** · 10-11-2004, 10:08 PM

Althugh I have never been to your abode, I do have a pretty good mental image of you sitting back in your living room with a beer in one hand and a pistol in the other. I hope you don't have a shotgun in the house.

At least you don't have crickets - those things will drive you insane (relatively speaking of course).

**BobMc** · 10-11-2004, 10:12 PM

Originally Posted by iceman

While I generally don't actually hunt the rodents that make their way into my house, I will admit to a certain sense of victory when in the quiet of the night I hear that "SNAP" that confirms my trap was well-baited and well-placed.

This is my first year of the hunting, previously I've relied on the traps. The longer I battle them the more respect I have for them, traps are inhumane. I prefer the spirit and challenge of the hunt.

Of course I have to wait till the wife and kids are either out of the house or asleep. I've failed to inform the wife of my new form of vermin removal, I don't think she'd approve.

I'd be willing to bet the wife will come home with mouse traps tomorrow, then I'll have to go back to the traditional method. Until then, I'm pissed, drunk and getting armed. Hopefully no damage other than mouse damage will be done.

BobMc

**The AD** · 10-11-2004, 10:19 PM

I had a vermin problem a couple years back of the slightly larger size. A mouse is nothing. You go down in your basement and see a freakin' rat staring at you, that's a different story.

Anyway, I bought an electric trap and it did the trick. The trap is basically a plastic tube with an electrified metal plate midway through. You place the bait on the far end, the rat walks across the metal plate, and zap! he's done. There's even an LED on top that indicates the rat is in the trap. Not really needed, since you see its tail sticking out the end.

They can't resist peanut butter, by the way.

**iceman** · 10-11-2004, 10:20 PM

edit: To Bob Mc: meh, don't shoot towards any big expensive stuff, you'll be fine.

If you bag a mouse tonight (no proof required, I trust you), I'll give you ten bucks the next time I see you.

Git ta huntin', boy!

**Max Gosey** · 10-11-2004, 10:27 PM

No mice, but my indicator is here: it smelled like fall today. It happened freakishly in early August (that was really weird) and summer persisted, but today is the day. Today is the day. Besides, the forecast low for Thursday is Edit: 42 DEGREES!!! OPEN THE WINDOWS!!! (That's the "beginning of fall" ritual... I love it). I can't wait, yo. I'm SICK of the hot! (even though wakeboarding on the new motor today gave me a reason to hold on to the warm just a liiittle bit longer). Let the cold days come!

Back to varmint-hunting...

Edit 2: We looked for about 2 days for my gerbil that I got for my birthday a while back. We just couldn't find the little bastard until we noticed that my cat hadn't been around either. We went upstairs in an obscure corner of the room and noticed half a hamster in the middle of the floor. There was a tail hanging from (and presumably a torso inside) the cat's mouth. It was kinda gross, and I missed that poor little bugger for a long time. He was cool...

We still have the cat. No more hamsters, though...

**BobMc** · 10-11-2004, 10:29 PM

Originally Posted by iceman

Carnies smell like cabbage.

I took the family to the fair this year, I beg to differ. They smell like smoke, cigarette smoke. I smoke, I smoke a lot, these guys smoke a LOT.

Old overworked jokes=bad
Old underworked cleverly used jokes=good

BobMc

**gonzo** · 10-11-2004, 10:43 PM

although it is of a larger variety...

i went to college in maine and my buddies and i all lived in these shitty farmhouses in the middle of nowhere 10 or so miles from campus. awesome for parties and shooting guns off the porch and burning couches, etc. also awesome for varmin. at one point my buddies had a family of 5 skunks living under their porch. when winter came they moved into the basement. didn't cause any trouble so we let them be down there. but i digress. the same guys house started to stink one day. as you can imagine or have experienced, it is not unusual for such houses to stink for random periods of time for unknown reasons. this smelled like something dead so we assumed a mouse had died somewhere and continued to get stoned and shoot stuff. a few weeks later the smell was still there and the residents had gotten used to it but when visitors (such as myself) would arrive, it was nauseating. finally, a search was launched to fined the stinky dead varmit. we looked behind desks, under couches, etc. until we had pinpointed the smell to one room. we pulled back the couch and VOILA! there was a dead possum stuck halfway through a hole in the wall. the had somehow gotting into this weird half-living room half-hallway and was behind the couch and chewed a hole through the wall and was trying to get through. but got stuck. and died. and rotted. for weeks.

this thing was fucking nasty. but had to be removed. so the residents bucked up for who was going to put the rubber dishgloves on and pull the rotten possum out of his death hole. my buddy mike lost, put on the gloves, grabbed purchase and heaved ho.

the possum tore in half. literally tore in half. his head and upper rotten torso stuck in the wall, his hind legs and ass and long skinny tail in mikes hands.

anyways, we all freaked out and dry heaved a bit and mike fished the rest of the sucker out of the wall. really fucking gross.

**gonzo** · 10-11-2004, 11:02 PM

so in my house i was sitting on the couch with my roomate watching toob or a ski video or something and we see this little fella come out from under the TV. not a mouse, not a rat, and not a possum. he was really laid back and just kinda sniffed around the middle of the carpet and would look around once in a while. really small and cute. we think he was a mole, but we weren't sure. anyway, we decided not to fuck with him because he wasn't fucking with us. plus, our drywall didn't meet our floors and bare insulation lined the bottom, so critters could get anywhere they wanted whenever.

so we named him andre and saw him periodically just hanging out. he never skittered around or anything and just kinda hung out. he was cool.

a few weeks later, one of us was cooking on the stove and started to smell something awful. the stove was turned off then and used periodically, but the smell kept coming back because there was obviously something dead in it somewhere. the obvious solution was to not use the stove anymore, so the foreman grill was placed on the stove top and became the stove thereafter. then one night people were wasted and cooking food on the foreman and someone was drunk enough to forget that the foreman was cooking the food, not the stove, and they tried to turn the heat up on the foreman with the stove controls. a few moments later we had a small to mid grade electrical fire on the stove top due to the plugged in and fired up foreman being directly on top of a red hot range burner.

the fire was put out that night fairly easily, although we were lucky the whole house didn't burn down. the problem then was that with no foreman, we would have to make the stove unsmelly, which meant we would have to find the dead critter. after a few moments of investigation we found that you can lift up the top of the stove and there is a big crumb-catcher tray thingie.

well, apparently andre had gotten up on the stove top and squirted down under where the coils go down into the crumb catcher to have a snack. then while he was in there we put something on the stove and killed the poor little guy. the smell was coming from his carass that was cooked enough to kill him, but not cooked enough to be all gone, so every time we would fire up the stove we would warm him up and cook a bit more...

gross. not as gross as a rotten possum ripping in half in your hands, but gross nonetheless.

**Tresckow** · 10-11-2004, 11:33 PM

Like Ice was saying, if you knock off a mouse with a pellet gun, after 8 beers, and that poor Packers effort, you've got a couple beers coming your way from me.

Happy hunting

**Tyrone Shoelaces** · 10-12-2004, 12:51 AM

gonzo's story are pretty funny.

i find that i laugh harder when I look up at his avatar and imagine that little midget santy claus dude smokin a doob & tellin these stories over a beer.

**rip** · 10-12-2004, 01:00 AM

Bob is a fudge fan?

say it aint so bob, say it aint so...

aside- how can madden continue to lick favre's nuts even after he has thrown 3 picks, i dont get it. go lions!

**fiddler** · 10-12-2004, 11:58 PM

Picture one neighbor's Dodge Caravan. Picture one huge rat looking for a warm place to hang out. Picture the key in the ignition and then a horrible noise. Look under the front of the mini-van and see long tail hanging down. Open hood and see huge shredded rat caught in the single long winding belt and spread all over the engine compartment. We had to clean it out REALLY good to keep the remains from heating and stenching over and over much like the stove story. That was one of the most fun Saturdays I ever had.

We get the occasional mouse in the house when it gets colder but mostly we get spiders.

Big spiders. Can't say I like big spiders much. Our dog used to chase and eat them but now he's too old and arthritic to move much. He also ate bees and yellowjackets but thats another story. Spiders, yeah, I woke up to one almost as big as my palm once on my back and my wife says I levitated about a foot off the bed.

**snowsprite** · 10-13-2004, 07:05 AM

Three sadistic cats keep my home vermin-free! Of course we have to put up w/ them hanging around trying to look cute and scratching up the furniture but for me it's an okay trade-off.

And yes, I can feel and smell winter everywhere. What I can't understand is despite brrrrr-cold temps at night...why is there still so much green here? Compared to VT which was ablaze in orange and yellow, here in Connecticut it still looks practically like August. Hurry up and die already you stupid leaves!

Sprite

**elevens** · 10-13-2004, 08:06 AM

I'm might go to jail for mice murder this year. I killed 7 so far this fall.

My place is an old A-frame up in VT and has more holes than swiss cheese. Not to mention that it's surrounded by NF. As Bobmc said, once it gets cold, they come in and play.

It's a battle for about a month before they finally get the hint - stay in my place and you will die. Last year the count was close to twenty and at times I felt like the guy from Never Cry Wolf.

I love the sounds of traps going off in the night. The sound of victory.

elevens

**FreakofSnow** · 10-13-2004, 08:10 AM

29 Degrees this morning. First good frost, scraped my windshield with my credit card like I do every year. Time to pull the scraper from the depths of the garage tonight. Bring on Ullr!

**Skidancer** · 10-13-2004, 08:17 AM

32 degrees and snowing. I'm hoping it's coming down in the mts as well. Hello winter (it's about time!

)

I agree that dealing with pet cats is far superior to dealing with live mice (and the kitties enjoy the play and kill far more than I would!)

**gonzo** · 10-13-2004, 08:22 AM

Originally Posted by elevens

I love the sounds of traps going off in the night. The sound of victory.

Nice...

**cmsummit** · 10-13-2004, 08:39 AM

Woke to 6"- 8" of fresh on my truck this morning. Bring it on!!

**DJSapp** · 10-13-2004, 08:55 AM

It kinda rained here in LA yesterday. First sign of weather here in about 6 months. The sad part is that I was really stoked about a minute of sprinkles.