Help me prank my girlfriend

[davieboot]

I am going to visit my girlfriend next weekend, but she doesn't know I am coming, so I want to pull some prank on her where I show up as the punchline (I am not that exciting, but she'll be excited).

She is a cool chick and can take a lot, but it isn't as if anything goes. For example, I could fake her car getting stolen, and she would laugh about it at the end. But I wouldn't fake tell her that I have chlamydia. So, I guess there are limits, but I am happy to hear all suggestions.

My first idea was to wait until Monday and have her boss come into her office and say something like, "we hired this new guy and I was hoping you could get him up to date on your accounts. We have decided to go another direction, and we are going to let you go, but we really need you to transfer your work over to him as smoothly as possible. He'll be here in 15 minutes." Then, I would be the new guy. Obviously, the actual conversation would take some work. But, problem is, I don't want to wait until Monday to head down. Suggestions?

[HaoXianJhao]

So I m banging your girl and you walk in with a rug that has a bunch of conclusions you can...wait for it .........jump to.......

and you say...."so what conclusion should I jump to"

And I say let me finish my conclusion......
ha funny okbye

[Huckin eh?]

Call an escort and send her to her house. you show up with blow 2 minutes after said ho!
Commence the party!

[TheDingleberry]

I wouldn't do anything at her work that involves her boss, unless you are friends with the boss.

[Steepdeepnlong]

Call an escort and send her to her house. you show up with blow 2 minutes after said ho!
Commence the party!

Close. Get some of her girlfriends in on the deal. Have a few of them (and her, duh) gather at someone's house. At some point, someone lets it our that they've hired a male stripper. Get some guy she doesn't know to knock on the door, announce the stripper is here, set up a boom box, etc. Then you walk in. I see two possible outcomes. 1) The girls are so worked up by then in anticipation of seeing a stripper that they all rip your clothes off and take turns having their way with you, or 2), you're girlfriend is so worked up in anticipation of seeing a stripper, and then surprised/excited that it is you, that she takes you home and bangs your brains out. Either way, you win.

[fish]

this is exactly how people find out their girlfriend is cheating on them

[Nathan Explosion]

How has nobody suggested a dick in a box? It's the perfect occasion.

[TheDingleberry]

this is exactly how people find out their girlfriend is cheating on them

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FUUCCCKK!!! How do I ^^^^^^^^embed? I can never do it.

[lobstahmeatwad]

ha funny okbye

woah are you the racoon guy?

[davieboot]

Close. Get some of her girlfriends in on the deal. Have a few of them (and her, duh) gather at someone's house. At some point, someone lets it our that they've hired a male stripper. Get some guy she doesn't know to knock on the door, announce the stripper is here, set up a boom box, etc. Then you walk in. I see two possible outcomes. 1) The girls are so worked up by then in anticipation of seeing a stripper that they all rip your clothes off and take turns having their way with you, or 2), you're girlfriend is so worked up in anticipation of seeing a stripper, and then surprised/excited that it is you, that she takes you home and bangs your brains out. Either way, you win.

Ha, I really like this idea. I'll work on it.

I am friends with the boss, and though I haven't cleared it with him yet, I bet he would be down. It is a pretty relaxed work environment.

I wish it were legal to hire someone to impersonate a police officer.

[davep]

I wish it were legal to hire someone to impersonate a police officer.

Hot cops?

[ill-advised strategy]

I got gonorrhea from the tractor!

[Nathan Explosion]

Feed her some kind of oddly shaped indistinguishable meat. Tell her it's a beloved family pet. Enjoy.

[Name Redacted]

post a bunch of naked pics of her on TGR! Perfect!

That and the "Dick in a Box" of course

Um, or Der Poopenhausen

whew, can't believe it took so long to get that out of the way, you guys are slipping

[vinzclortho]

Hot cops?

hire the one on the right with the gunt.

[Caucasian Asian]

Have a couple of maggots follow her out of the grocery store and stuff her in the trunk of her car, then drive off in said car. Deliver car to where you are waiting, and "SURPRISE!"

[carvedog]

Some guy did a "surprise" on my sis that involved a dead sheep, guns, blood on the douche boyfriend and a termination of the relationship about a month later.

I don't think the you are being fired scenario is quite to that level, but it didn't make me all warm and fuzzy.

The male stripper thing might have some legs.

[carvedog]

hire the one on the right with the gunt.

Preggers.

[Obstruction]

My first idea was to wait until Monday and have her boss come into her office and say something like, "we hired this new guy and I was hoping you could get him up to date on your accounts. We have decided to go another direction, and we are going to let you go, but we really need you to transfer your work over to him as smoothly as possible. He'll be here in 15 minutes." Then, I would be the new guy. Obviously, the actual conversation would take some work. But, problem is, I don't want to wait until Monday to head down. Suggestions?

Too much complicated not enough funneh in my estimation. I mean losing your job is the antithesis of funny in today's economy. I think the chance encounter when she is out getting coffee our grocery shopping is more likely to lead to crazy, spontaneous humping. and after all that is the objective is it not?.

[Caucasian Asian]

I surprised Mrs CA with a visit when she was still in school. Drove 12hrs to her school and just parked in the lot outside the building she had clinic in. Then I sat on the hood of the truck and drank a coffee while I waited for her to notice that I was sitting outside the window.

That did not turn out to be a bad weekend.

[davieboot]

What about having a big box from FedEx when she gets home. I am in the box. I can also put a note on it to throw her off a bit.

[bmg97]

You sure you want to show up unanounced ? Could walk in on something you dont want to see.

[davieboot]

Yeah, good point. If my girlfriend is having midafternoon gangbangs with half the neighborhood, I definitely would not want to find out.

[BSS]

Prank, you say?

"Whoops, wrong hole. Sorry about that!"

[Crock]

What about having a big box from FedEx when she gets home. I am in the box. I can also put a note on it to throw her off a bit.

what if she decides to make a detour on the way home and you suffocate?

I like the stripper idea. Something easy that I've done before is to give her a call a couple blocks before you got to her house, talk to her while you're walking up to the place, saying I miss you etc, then knock and she opens the door to find you!

..and possibly dick-in-a-box, with blow and hookers, der poopenhausen etc...